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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Just curious why you all chose to join Catholic Match.

07/01/2012 new

Well, for starters, I am Catholic. ;) That's one reason why. Second, I have a friend who met her husband on here a few years ago and they are now married with a son. They're not only hopelessly, helplessly in love with each other but they are each other's best friends. And she told me that I should try this site out so I did.

I've been off-and-on Catholic Match for the last two years. I've communicated with a few women. I have yet to meet anyone face-to-face although I did come close to meeting someone in New York last year. It didn't work out because she got cold feet and there were other issues going on in her life which caused the meeting to be postponed. Ultimately, the meeting never happened because she had a change of heart. I really wanted to go, too. So, as you can imagine, it was quite disappointing not to get to meet her after weeks of communication on the phone and through email.

I don't know why it is, but where I live in South Carolina is not a state where a lot of women are from on Catholic Match. South Carolina mostly has Baptists, but there are some Catholics and for some reason there aren't many of them on this site. My problem is that I'm now in this inconvenient age bracket. I'm 39 and I'll be 40. I'm too young for the older women and too old for the younger women. So, I'm kind of stuck, you know what I mean? I mean, unless I win the lottery, become famous or get elected to political office. ;-)

I've dated non-Catholic women and that's never been a problem for me. It's just that over time I decided that I want to marry a woman who shares Catholic values as I do. And we can then raise a child or children to be Catholic. And I know that some women aren't going to like me saying this, but I want to have at least one child with a woman. I don't mind if she's already got a child or children from a previous relationship. I just want us to have at least one child together. And I'd rather be honest from the get-go than to lead someone on and have them believing something that isn't true or real. If you don't want to have any more kids, fine. I accept that. Then I'm not your man. But I do want to have kids. And, believe me, I sure wish that I would have been married and had children sooner. But it wasn't always my fault or up to me. I got a late start in life and love because I was very shy when I was younger and didn't date much. I also concetrated on my work a lot more than relationships when I was younger. And I thought I had found my soulmate three years ago. She was someone that I would have married had things progressed in the relationship. But it wasn't meant to be.

So, that's why I joined Catholic Match. And I'm trying really hard to get my money's worth on here. :)

07/01/2012 new
I'm curious what you mean that people might get upset by you wanting at least one child. I don't find that offensive at all unless you are completely avoiding women your age because of that.

I joined because to be blunt I was striking out on the secular sites. I was finding much older men, guys who were divorced with kids (or worse men who never married the mom), non Catholics (or for that matter non Christians), guys wanting sex, etc. When I would mention my religious views I was often attacked on these sites. I put up a free profile here and got a few responses from guys who lived by me fitting what I wanted: never married, childless, around my age, etc. Sadly though most have faded. One got married I have since found out (but not from here).

I subscribed when I got a few messages from men who seemed like good potential mates. However after I did this I realized I was running into a lot of the same things I ran into on the secular sites. Oh sure I don't run into a lot of men just looking for sex (at least not that they admit to me)but I run into a lot of much older men, guys with kids, and guys who are LDR but sound like great guys if I did LDR. Meanwhile I have had guys my age often bypass me because of my age, when they are just to blame for being single as I am, only they seem to think it's my fault. Many of the men are way too extremist for me and I could never handle marrying a man who believes that I am not equal to him.

My membership expires next month and to be honest I highly doubt I will renew. Outside of a few great guys that could be potentials there's way too many that aren't. Oddly, I think the women here for the most part are much better than most of the men and I can't figure out why men are bypassing them outside of their age (which to me tells me the men doing this are superficial and no quality). Instead I will concentrate on finding a man near me through people I know and singles groups.
07/01/2012 new

(Quote) Jeff-406043 said: Just curious why you all chose to join Catholic Match.
(Quote) Jeff-406043 said:

Just curious why you all chose to join Catholic Match.

--hide--

I felt a sign to be on here, honestly. Back in early 2009, I first heard about it from a guy I was working a retreat with. At the time, he was dating a girl from here. It was maybe 1 1/2 - 2 years later when I did a free membership, and I started subscribing in October. I was reading a Catholic book, and there was a little postcard size advertisement for CM. Shortly after subscribing, I found out that a friend who had recently gotten engaged had met her fiance' (now husband) on here. I had met him in 2009 while they were dating but had no idea that had met online. So it was quite a shock to find out they had met on CM! So, those were 3 "signs" that I should sign up/stay on here. We'll see. I've had 2 F2F's and have dated one guy. I have made many friends and have definitely learned a lot about my faith and have grown in my faith. So, even if I don't meet "him" on here, I don't feel that I wasted time or money.

07/01/2012 new

To meet the last love of my life.. rolling eyes


Since we can all see that didn't happen.. The more important question is..Why have I stayed? Because I have made the most incredible friends anyone could ever be so lucky to find.. And because IT'S SO MUCH DARN FUN HERE!!!hyper

07/01/2012 new

(Quote) Jeff-406043 said: Well, for starters, I am Catholic. ;) That's one reason why. Second, I have a friend who met h...
(Quote) Jeff-406043 said:

Well, for starters, I am Catholic. ;) That's one reason why. Second, I have a friend who met her husband on here a few years ago and they are now married with a son. They're not only hopelessly, helplessly in love with each other but they are each other's best friends. And she told me that I should try this site out so I did.

I've been off-and-on Catholic Match for the last two years. I've communicated with a few women. I have yet to meet anyone face-to-face although I did come close to meeting someone in New York last year. It didn't work out because she got cold feet and there were other issues going on in her life which caused the meeting to be postponed. Ultimately, the meeting never happened because she had a change of heart. I really wanted to go, too. So, as you can imagine, it was quite disappointing not to get to meet her after weeks of communication on the phone and through email.

I don't know why it is, but where I live in South Carolina is not a state where a lot of women are from on Catholic Match. South Carolina mostly has Baptists, but there are some Catholics and for some reason there aren't many of them on this site. My problem is that I'm now in this inconvenient age bracket. I'm 39 and I'll be 40. I'm too young for the older women and too old for the younger women. So, I'm kind of stuck, you know what I mean? I mean, unless I win the lottery, become famous or get elected to political office. ;-)

I've dated non-Catholic women and that's never been a problem for me. It's just that over time I decided that I want to marry a woman who shares Catholic values as I do. And we can then raise a child or children to be Catholic. And I know that some women aren't going to like me saying this, but I want to have at least one child with a woman. I don't mind if she's already got a child or children from a previous relationship. I just want us to have at least one child together. And I'd rather be honest from the get-go than to lead someone on and have them believing something that isn't true or real. If you don't want to have any more kids, fine. I accept that. Then I'm not your man. But I do want to have kids. And, believe me, I sure wish that I would have been married and had children sooner. But it wasn't always my fault or up to me. I got a late start in life and love because I was very shy when I was younger and didn't date much. I also concetrated on my work a lot more than relationships when I was younger. And I thought I had found my soulmate three years ago. She was someone that I would have married had things progressed in the relationship. But it wasn't meant to be.

So, that's why I joined Catholic Match. And I'm trying really hard to get my money's worth on here. :)

--hide--


Jeff..Jeff.. Jeff... You did so GOOD with the first paragraph.. The rest is all just negative.. All the reasons why people don't have success here..ACKKKK...You spent more effort on the negatives than on the positives.. WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH YOU?

07/01/2012 new
(Quote) Jeff-406043 said: Well, for starters, I am Catholic. ;) That's one reason why. Second, I have a friend who met her husband o...
(Quote) Jeff-406043 said:

Well, for starters, I am Catholic. ;) That's one reason why. Second, I have a friend who met her husband on here a few years ago and they are now married with a son. They're not only hopelessly, helplessly in love with each other but they are each other's best friends. And she told me that I should try this site out so I did.

I've been off-and-on Catholic Match for the last two years. I've communicated with a few women. I have yet to meet anyone face-to-face although I did come close to meeting someone in New York last year. It didn't work out because she got cold feet and there were other issues going on in her life which caused the meeting to be postponed. Ultimately, the meeting never happened because she had a change of heart. I really wanted to go, too. So, as you can imagine, it was quite disappointing not to get to meet her after weeks of communication on the phone and through email.

I don't know why it is, but where I live in South Carolina is not a state where a lot of women are from on Catholic Match. South Carolina mostly has Baptists, but there are some Catholics and for some reason there aren't many of them on this site. My problem is that I'm now in this inconvenient age bracket. I'm 39 and I'll be 40. I'm too young for the older women and too old for the younger women. So, I'm kind of stuck, you know what I mean? I mean, unless I win the lottery, become famous or get elected to political office. ;-)

I've dated non-Catholic women and that's never been a problem for me. It's just that over time I decided that I want to marry a woman who shares Catholic values as I do. And we can then raise a child or children to be Catholic. And I know that some women aren't going to like me saying this, but I want to have at least one child with a woman. I don't mind if she's already got a child or children from a previous relationship. I just want us to have at least one child together. And I'd rather be honest from the get-go than to lead someone on and have them believing something that isn't true or real. If you don't want to have any more kids, fine. I accept that. Then I'm not your man. But I do want to have kids. And, believe me, I sure wish that I would have been married and had children sooner. But it wasn't always my fault or up to me. I got a late start in life and love because I was very shy when I was younger and didn't date much. I also concetrated on my work a lot more than relationships when I was younger. And I thought I had found my soulmate three years ago. She was someone that I would have married had things progressed in the relationship. But it wasn't meant to be.

So, that's why I joined Catholic Match. And I'm trying really hard to get my money's worth on here. :)

--hide--


Jeff, you did a really good job communicating your thoughts. Some woman is going to come across this post and will be touched by your honesty and openness...and she will see you are seriously looking for courtship, love, and to start a family.
07/01/2012 new
(Quote) Jeff-406043 said: Just curious why you all chose to join Catholic Match.
(Quote) Jeff-406043 said:

Just curious why you all chose to join Catholic Match.

--hide--


I joined Catholic Match to find a steady, intelligent Catholic man who was looking for a woman like me ...
07/01/2012 new

(Quote) Dawn-758914 said: I'm curious what you mean that people might get upset by you wanting at least one child. I don't ...
(Quote) Dawn-758914 said: I'm curious what you mean that people might get upset by you wanting at least one child. I don't find that offensive at all unless you are completely avoiding women your age because of that.

I joined because to be blunt I was striking out on the secular sites. I was finding much older men, guys who were divorced with kids (or worse men who never married the mom), non Catholics (or for that matter non Christians), guys wanting sex, etc. When I would mention my religious views I was often attacked on these sites. I put up a free profile here and got a few responses from guys who lived by me fitting what I wanted: never married, childless, around my age, etc. Sadly though most have faded. One got married I have since found out (but not from here).

I subscribed when I got a few messages from men who seemed like good potential mates. However after I did this I realized I was running into a lot of the same things I ran into on the secular sites. Oh sure I don't run into a lot of men just looking for sex (at least not that they admit to me)but I run into a lot of much older men, guys with kids, and guys who are LDR but sound like great guys if I did LDR. Meanwhile I have had guys my age often bypass me because of my age, when they are just to blame for being single as I am, only they seem to think it's my fault. Many of the men are way too extremist for me and I could never handle marrying a man who believes that I am not equal to him.

My membership expires next month and to be honest I highly doubt I will renew. Outside of a few great guys that could be potentials there's way too many that aren't. Oddly, I think the women here for the most part are much better than most of the men and I can't figure out why men are bypassing them outside of their age (which to me tells me the men doing this are superficial and no quality). Instead I will concentrate on finding a man near me through people I know and singles groups.
--hide--


Dawn,

If you are not finding the kind of guy you feel has potential enough, then moving off site might be the best thing for you. I can't argue with you for your reasons. Many others have made the same point in the past. For me, it's like Khoa's fishing pole analogy. You just keep trying and trying until you have some success.

Good luck in future and keep "him" open in your prayers.
Robert

07/01/2012 new

(Quote) Jeff-406043 said: Just curious why you all chose to join Catholic Match.
(Quote) Jeff-406043 said:

Just curious why you all chose to join Catholic Match.

--hide--


Jeff,

I joined Catholic Match as another avenue to meet other
single people. While it can be easy to get discouraged, we must ‘do the legwork’
so that God may effect change in our lives. My future husband isn’t going to
knock on my door and say ‘Sorry I’m late- are you ready?’

I am on other sites and I meet people through work and
friends. It is difficult at 39 only because I really want marriage and children.
I find men my age or older either 1) already have kids and don’t want any more
or 2) do not want kids at all. Both of these are a ‘deal killer’ for me as I
have done everything else but have my own family. I have a career; I am
educated, well-traveled- lived essentially- but now ‘settling down’ sounds very
appealing to me.

I know down to my bones that God has a plan for me. I seek
only knowledge of His will and I follow it. I am an unmarried, outspoken, died
in the wool sinner with an extraordinarily deep faith and spiritual practice. I
am not ‘Catholic enough’ in my politics and social life for some people and ‘too
Catholic’ in my faith and spirituality for others. But this I know- I cannot be
the only one.

He’s out there and God is leading me to him. Catholic Match
is just one road I am walking along where we might happen to meet.

-Christine

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