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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people 45+. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is told in chapters 11-25 of the book of Genesis.
Learn More:Abraham & Sarah

Jul 23rd 2012 new

I agree and disagree. boggled I agree that there must be attraction, God willing those desires will never go away. I believe that physical attraction can grow though, given the right set of circumstances. I have had it happen more than once. I looked at someone, had very little in common with them and they were anything but what I considered attractive at that time. Stuff happens. I can think of twice that I ended up dating someone like that for a couple of years.

I don't think it happens all the time, but I'm not as quick to write off someone that I am not instantly attracted to these days. If there is common ground somewhere, I'll give it some time to see if anything else develops. Sounds like you tried and it didn't happen. Sorry - that stinks!

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

(Quote) Sandra-471894 said: I would rather be attracted to a husband. However, sometimes I think possibly Chris...
(Quote) Sandra-471894 said:




I would rather be attracted to a husband. However, sometimes I think possibly Christ may be calling one to find a spouse for His glory, especialy at our age (over 50) or so, to come together for a companion relationship for a purpose over and above physical attraction.

Wondering about this, I tend to feel more comfortable with living the rest of my life as a single woman. I work in human services, and many times I find a man is not into that type of life. I enjoy caring for others, and or helping friends that are not Catholic needing help.

I feel lonely at times, and want that man beside me in the morning, to hug before we get out of bed etc.... but then I may have to compromise my way of life for a man that I am physically attracted to.

Priests have relationships with Sisters who help care for the home they live in, and are just companions without a physical attraction.
Could we as Catholic women be called for this type of marriage?

What are your thoughts?

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Priests have relationships with Sisters who help care for the home they live in, and are just companions without a physical attraction.
Could we as Catholic women be called for this type of marriage?


No.. WE are not called to have this type of marriage.. The Church says we may not contract a marriage that cannot be fulfilled in physical intimacy.. There have been cases where couples have been denied a wedding in the Church because physical limitations prevented a completion of intercourse.. What you are describing is NOT marriage.. It is a caregiver position..

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

(Quote) Sheila-371804 said: Hi Everyone, I have heard this question many times on CM. How do you feel about the question...
(Quote) Sheila-371804 said:

Hi Everyone,
I have heard this question many times on CM. How do you feel about the question ? I think the person requires the whole package. How do you feel ?
Questions or comments... opinions perhaps ?

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I'm going to go against the grain a bit here. The "whole package" is a nice-to-have for me, but not a requirement. And of course, dirty, smelly, unkempt and nasty are not going to happen. But let's throw out the high and low scores as they say.

I could be physically attracted to someone, but if I don't find her spiritually, emotionally, and mentally attractive, there will be no marital satisfaction. However, if I am attracted a lady on a spiritual and emotional level, we are a good intellectual match, we have a great time together, she makes me happy, and very important - I can sense that she feels the same way about me - there will be no problem with marital satisfaction.

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

Bow Bow Thank you for saying that so much more eloquently than I have been able to manage!!! clap clap

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said: Thank you for saying that so much more eloquently than I have been able to manage!!!
(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said:

Thank you for saying that so much more eloquently than I have been able to manage!!!

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You're welcome, but I think you were 100% clear, and of course, I agree.

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: Cindy, don't you think that a lot of people feel that physical attraction isn'...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:


Cindy, don't you think that a lot of people feel that physical attraction isn't important at our age?

Recently there was a discussion in a FB group revolving around that idea that women should look for someone who is kind to them and ignore physical attraction.. It seemed that many of the women thought that physical attraction would develop later.. My reply was based on my last relationship.. Ummmm Noooo.. He could be the nicest guy in the world, but there has to be more than kindness..

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Hogwash!! Of course we need to be attracted to someone - although, what I find attractive may not be the next woman's cup of tea, but, hell, yes, there needs to be attraction or magic. Call it whatever you like, but I could never "convince" myself to love someone just because he hits all the marks. There has to be more. heart

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

(Quote) Cindy-57124 said: Hogwash!! Of course we need to be attracted to someone - although, what I find attractive ...
(Quote) Cindy-57124 said:



Hogwash!! Of course we need to be attracted to someone - although, what I find attractive may not be the next woman's cup of tea, but, hell, yes, there needs to be attraction or magic. Call it whatever you like, but I could never "convince" myself to love someone just because he hits all the marks. There has to be more.

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I feel the same way.. But I've seen others say that physical compatibility shouldn't matter at our age.. rolling eyes

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: I feel the same way.. But I've seen others say that physical compatibility should...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:


I feel the same way.. But I've seen others say that physical compatibility shouldn't matter at our age..

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Not according to anyone I know. You can watch a couple, even a couple of advanced years (neighbors - she's 83, he's 77 - married 8 years). They still hold hands. They still gaze at each other. They still touch as they walk past. I hope and pray that should God call me to marriage that I will share that with my spouse!

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Jul 23rd 2012 new

For those who do not wish intimacy of marital union (physical, emotional, mental intimacy) profiles should reflect that, no?..."Friendship Only" is an option here at CM, right?

But IF the profile says clearly..."seeking a gentleman/lady "For Marriage" in the Catholic Church"...the sacramental union under Christ, is desired,right? So, it would follow that "two becoming one" is more than mental literary technique, no? scratchchin


and...Donna, "60 is the new 40!!!!" wave saw that somewhere...maybe Jane Fonda's line... eyepopping back before she got into her 70's!!!So, ipso facto, "40 is the new 20!" cool Good News! Good News, everybody! laughing





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Jul 23rd 2012 new

(Quote) Barbara-863769 said: For those who do not wish intimacy of marital union (physical, emotional, mental intimacy) prof...
(Quote) Barbara-863769 said:

For those who do not wish intimacy of marital union (physical, emotional, mental intimacy) profiles should reflect that, no?..."Friendship Only" is an option here at CM, right?

But IF the profile says clearly..."seeking a gentleman/lady "For Marriage" in the Catholic Church"...the sacramental union under Christ, is desired,right? So, it would follow that "two becoming one" is more than mental literary technique, no?


and...Donna, "60 is the new 40!!!!" saw that somewhere...maybe Jane Fonda's line... back before she got into her 70's!!!So, ipso facto, "40 is the new 20!" Good News! Good News, everybody!





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Oh that puts me back WAY too young...30, ok -20 no thanks!!! I was way too stupid!

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