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A place to learn, mingle, and share

This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

08/02/2012 new

(Quote) John-666618 said: That's about the same as I paid in Newark, NJ in the mid 90's. I was told that...
(Quote) John-666618 said:




That's about the same as I paid in Newark, NJ in the mid 90's. I was told that it really only covered clerical fees and paid for the offices and things like that. Knowing what office space costs in Newark, it seemed like a bargain.

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That makes perfect sense. Thank you John.

08/02/2012 new
(Quote) Deborah-550454 said: The filing fee here is over $600. I wonder why it varies from state to state..?
(Quote) Deborah-550454 said:



The filing fee here is over $600. I wonder why it varies from state to state..?

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The archdiocese of Oklahoma pays for the entire process here.... scratchchin
08/02/2012 new
(Quote) Brenda-74660 said: The archdiocese of Oklahoma pays for the entire process here....
(Quote) Brenda-74660 said:

The archdiocese of Oklahoma pays for the entire process here....
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I will admit I took about two years to fill out my paperwork, I think it took that much time to allow myself to work through healing of memories at the same time....[quote] shhh
08/07/2012 new

I admit it. I'm dragging my feet. In 2008 I started the process. Did my paperwork, got my witnesses to do theirs. But one of my witnesses was a friend of mine who wasn't Catholic, and I think she got offended when she learned about the Catholic teachings. We never discussed it. She said she gave the priest the paper work, but it was suppose to be sent to the diocese. And it never got there. So I let it drop until recently. My mom agreed to be a witness. I don't like that it is a blaming process. I feel like I was to blame that he left and abandoned me. And I know that's not true. But right now I feel stuck and am hoping to getting this annulment done will unstick me.

08/07/2012 new

(Quote) Nancy-303994 said: I admit it. I'm dragging my feet. In 2008 I started the process. Did my paperwork, got my wit...
(Quote) Nancy-303994 said:

I admit it. I'm dragging my feet. In 2008 I started the process. Did my paperwork, got my witnesses to do theirs. But one of my witnesses was a friend of mine who wasn't Catholic, and I think she got offended when she learned about the Catholic teachings. We never discussed it. She said she gave the priest the paper work, but it was suppose to be sent to the diocese. And it never got there. So I let it drop until recently. My mom agreed to be a witness. I don't like that it is a blaming process. I feel like I was to blame that he left and abandoned me. And I know that's not true. But right now I feel stuck and am hoping to getting this annulment done will unstick me.

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God let me know, pretty clearly, that it was time to move forward again. It sounds as though you're getting the same message. God bless and keep you on this journey. heart

08/07/2012 new
(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said: God let me know, pretty clearly, that it was time to move forward again. It sounds as t...
(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said:




God let me know, pretty clearly, that it was time to move forward again. It sounds as though you're getting the same message. God bless and keep you on this journey.

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It is funny how God works like that...my annulment was final on my birthday in 1998 and I thank God for the healing that brought into my heart.... heart
08/07/2012 new

AnneMarie, I just don't like having to get down to anything that demands a lot of time and thought, and isn't fun! I knew there was a lot to say and to try to remember and it seemed too much like hard work - and obviously there was the whole idea of raking things up again that I didn't want to face. But I went to a fairly local hermitage for a couple of weekends over 2 years and managed to get most of it done in peace. My marriage ended in 2003, we were divorced in 2008 and finally the decree of nullity was granted on July 16th this year, the feast or Our lady of Mount Carmel. Having almost completed a 33-day consecration to Jesus through Mary on that day, I feel sure that Our Mother was involved. heart


It does feel good to know I am free, but I have also realized clearly through this, that I am in no huge rush to marry again. I can wait for the right man if that's the Lord's plan for me. If not, I have some great ideas about how to spend the years ahead and once my daughters have left home. There's so much to see and explore, and so many people who need help...


God bless you as you finish up this process - and good for you for getting your final documentation in.

08/08/2012 new

It took me a year to file for my annulment. It took me 2 years to get divorced and the pain of my divorce was the reason it then took me another year to file for my annulment. Filling out the paperwork for my annulment was not easy and I had to stop a few times. However, I feel that an annulment is important and so after a year I did it. I hope that I receive one as I believe it is the right thing to do.

08/08/2012 new
When I first submitted the answers to the questions, it was about 9 pages typed single spaced. Then they came back and asked for more information, and I did nothing on it for a year. Then I finally got up the nerve to write another 9 pages typed single spaced and submitted it. So even though my annulment process took just under 3 years, about a year of it was me stalling to turn in the additional information that was requested by the tribunal. It could have or should have been shorter, but it has not mattered anyway since that was 14 years ago, and I am still single.
08/08/2012 new

(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said: Since coming here, I realized that I have been dragging my feet in finalizing my annulment do...
(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said:

Since coming here, I realized that I have been dragging my feet in finalizing my annulment documents. I have had one paragraph to type up for almost a year and I've simply sat on it. I admit, now, that it is simply fear. If I am not available for dating, then I can avoid the chances of making another mistake with my life. The second reason came up in another post recently, and that is abject fear of getting married again while I am still considered fertile. Yes, there are multiple reasons this scares me. I am wrong in both of these suppositions. I do know that I can not be fully open to whatever plans God has for me without taking the final steps. I have made an appointment with my tribunal rep to turn in the final documentation.

I am curious though. I can't possibly be the only person who stalled for any number of reasons. Anyone else??

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I very much appreciate all the feedback I've gotten here. I'm waiting for my tribunal rep to get back to set up an appointment with her. I have to say that it is really nice to know that others have struggled with this. I can say that I have felt God at work in the process; when I started, when I have stalled, and when it was time to start again. The journey has been amazing though, and the people that God has blessed me with to walk it are incredible. Thank you all. heart

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