(Quote) Blake-883375 said:
Hello all! It's offical! I have recently started courting an amazing woman! She is my dream g...
(Quote) Blake-883375 said:
Hello all! It's offical! I have recently started courting an amazing woman! She is my dream girl, and I praise God for her everyday.
Our question is this: now that we are courting, what suggestions or insights do you all have to give us? (i.e. physical boundaries, stratigies for "where do we go from here" etc...)
Greetings, Blake -- Welcome to the CM forums. You'll pick up a lot of insight, wisdom and knowledge right here. People share their personal experiences to add to the appeal.
Now -- your courtship. Erin and Jenny have each suggested a good book to read -- those should be helpful.
This reply could go on forever, but I'll try to be succinct. This is a time of discernment -- to take a good look not only at your girlfriend, but yourself as well. Get to know yourself and her as best you can -- that includes the strengths AND weaknesses flaws. Most of what you will go through will come naturally. Be polite and respectful; develop your listening skills; place yourselves in different surroundings to see what's comfortable for both of you. Examine your likes and dislikes. Place emphasis upon your spiritual lives. Each of you should be supportive of each other. After all, each of you should be helping to live lives leading to eternal salvation. Are there annoying traits that she has? Or mannerisms that may seem cute now but will annoy the heck out of you if you decide upon marriage and spend 24 hours a day with each other.
Try to interact with her friends and family; she can do the same. It can reveal the character each of you has.
As time progresses, flaws and faults will be evident, as will your likes and dislikes. When these issues arise, try to solve them rather than hope they'll just work out themselves. Agreements reached ahead of time can save a lot of hurting in the future. Each of you is uniique so there will be some differences. What can each of you contribute to a solid relationship?
As your relationship progresses, you might look into compatibility tests which, I understand, can be revealing and show areas that are in need of discussion. I'm not sure if every diocese offers them, and at the time my wife and I got married, they weren't offered or required.
Be yourself. Let her get to know you. Will each of you get to know everything about each other? No. That's an ongoing process. As your relationship continues, both of you will grow. Getting to know each other is a lifelong process. Encourage her to be herself as well.
There are many facets to consider, but many of these aren't appropriate at this stage. See how things progress.
Physical boundaries? A good knowledge of the Commandments and Catechism regarding chastity is a must. Temptations are bound to happen, so you can consider receiving the sacraments of Reconciliation and the Eucharist to strengthen you on your journey.
This is a time to give serious consideration to your lives. Serious, yes, but it's also a time to enjoy each other's company. It will be an exciting time in your lives.
Enjoy....and be thankful.