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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Today at work one of my students was telling me about "The Birth Order Book" and "The Firstborn Advantage" by Dr. Kevin Leman. Apparently, your place in the line up of children in your family can say a lot about who you are; your personality and maturity level. I love reading this kind of stuff, so I immediately requested both of the books through interlibrary loan. I'm excited for them to arrive so I can read them!

So, where are you in your family? How many siblings do you have, and how many boys and girls? Do you think your birth order affected the person you are today?

I'll start! I'm the oldest. I have two younger brothers (23 and 13) and five younger sisters (20, 18, 16, 11, and 7). And yes, I think being the oldest forced me to step out of my comfort zone more than any of my siblings have had to and as a result I think I've always been pretty mature for my age. I always had a lot of responsibility growing up, and I know my parents trusted me with things they don't even allow some of my siblings (who are much older than I was at the time) to handle.

09/28/2012 new

I'm number 3 of 4. Older sister 40, older brother almost 37, younger brother almost 30.

this hard part was when my younger brother came along. I was no longer the baby of the family and I wasn't the only girl. Kind of felt like there wasn't a place for me, when I was young. I out grew that feeling by middle school age.


The other thing that was hard was that if my older sister messed up with some responsibility then the rules changed for the rest of us. an example is my sister almost burned the house down when cooking while parents were gone and she was in charge. The rest of us were never allowed to cook with out a parent in the house. My sister could not cook. While my older brother and I could cook well (and we were the ones who knew what to do when she caught the pan on fire).


While I remember how I felt and how things affected me then, I can't put into words how they affected what kind of adult I became.

09/28/2012 new

More books. biggrin I am the oldest. I have one younger sister, she is twenty one, and the best little sister in human history. I kind of think my parents used me as a guinea pig, and perfecting what worked, and forgeting what did not work in parenting my sister. It might have, to be honest, I haven't really thought about it much. I am also the oldest of my immediate cousins, and I know what you mean by having parents or uncles place extra extra responsibility.

09/28/2012 new

I definitely know it affected who I am today. I am the third of seven. Four brothers (25, 23, 14, and 10) and two sisters (19 and 17). My two older brothers and I were always given quite a bit of responsibility when it came to the younger ones. My parents would leave us in charge of the younger four fairly often when we were younger. I started keeping all four by myself when I was 12. I learned to cook the meals when mom had to be away, laundry, house cleaning, saying prayers and putting the younger ones to bed with a story if she wasn't home at bedtime. When my grandma was dying and my mother was spending a great deal of time out of town to be with her I also took responsibility for grocery shopping. I certainly wasn't alone in all of this, my dad and two older brothers helped out, but I learned just how difficult it can be to run a large household and learned to appreciate my mother a lot more!

I think some of it is dependent upon personality as well. Being the oldest child will vary from person to person simply because they have different personalities. It will make a difference how they handle situations that arise and how they react. For myself I think my personality liking to have things in order contributed to my higher sense of responsibility, but who knows how I would be today if I hadn't had the chance to explore with that while I was very young? If I had been an only child I probably would have been more spoiled, and rather than develop my personality and maturity level through responsibility it might have been more indulged.

Also I love being an older sister in a large family. There is so much fun to be had in the contrasting personalities and ages and watching the younger ones grow up trying to be like you. I wouldn't trade it for the world. biggrin

09/30/2012 new

Hi, Jenny -

Absolutely it has shaped me. I am the oldest of, technically, 3 - my sis is 30, my brother is 21. But my family was also a foster family when I was young, mostly newborns to 2 yrs of age. By the time I was 8, I was feeding babies. By 10, I was diapering and dressing. By 12, I was babysitting frequently for my parents. While those years definitely nurtured a level of maturity and responsibility that have often made me stand out, it created an air of expectation with my parents that they could always call me for everything. It's been hard for me as an adult sometimes to learn to tell my parents "no" and not drop everything to come running for them - they grew to depend on me a wee bit too much sometimes! On the other hand, my sister, who was the baby of the family for many years, frequently "got away with murder" for stuff I would have been grounded into the next year for. laughing


If you enjoy this type of stuff, have you ever read up on/done a Meyers-Briggs test? Very interesting! Look for a book titled "Do What You Are" - it's more professionally-based, but still an interesting read!

09/30/2012 new

(Quote) Melanie-894195 said: If you enjoy this type of stuff, have you ever read up on/done a Meyers-Briggs test? Very inter...
(Quote) Melanie-894195 said:

If you enjoy this type of stuff, have you ever read up on/done a Meyers-Briggs test? Very interesting! Look for a book titled "Do What You Are" - it's more professionally-based, but still an interesting read!

--hide--

Oh my goodness, I am obsessed with MBTI! Haha...you don't even want to get me started on that! I created a thread on it a couple years ago. I have not heard of the book though, so thanks so much for the recommendation!

09/30/2012 new

I grew up in an extended family situation so I have to include cousins as well. I am the oldest and the middle child. The oldest is actually only 8 months older that me (cousin) and my sister is 2 years younger. She was the youngest for 13 years so she will always be the baby though she isn't anymore. Being the oldest I think more is expected of me. One thing I didn't like about being the oldest I would beg to do something at say 10 and be told no, I was too young or whatever and then I would finally be able to do it and then right after my sister who is not 10 yet would be able to as well.

09/30/2012 new

(Quote) Nekeisha-896394 said: I grew up in an extended family situation so I have to include cousins as well. I am the oldes...
(Quote) Nekeisha-896394 said:

I grew up in an extended family situation so I have to include cousins as well. I am the oldest and the middle child. The oldest is actually only 8 months older that me (cousin) and my sister is 2 years younger. She was the youngest for 13 years so she will always be the baby though she isn't anymore. Being the oldest I think more is expected of me. One thing I didn't like about being the oldest I would beg to do something at say 10 and be told no, I was too young or whatever and then I would finally be able to do it and then right after my sister who is not 10 yet would be able to as well.

--hide--

This is SO true!

10/01/2012 new

I love to tell people how many siblings I have and watch their jaw hit the floor laughing


I am number 5 of 10. I have 2 older brothers, 2 older sister, 4 younger brothers and 1 younger sister. I feel like being in the middle I didn't have to grow up as fast as my oldest sister but at the same time my younger brothers gave me a lot of exposure to responsibility. wink

10/01/2012 new
I'm one of 6 and for the first 20 yrs of my life I was the baby ( I have a 3 yr old sister now). I can honestly say that I can be a TOTAL brat sometimes (I promise I try really hard not to be though haha) because I was (...ok I still am tongue) spoiled so much. It's funny how different my older sister and I are. She's a total type A personality and I'm more of a free spirit lol. balloon

I'm just lucky my mom was always on our case about things and corrected all bad behaviors... heart
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