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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people under 45. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

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Oct 5th 2012 new
(Quote) Jim-624621 said: I think that economically, since 50% of college graduates are not able to find jobs after college (McDonalds...
(Quote) Jim-624621 said:

I think that economically, since 50% of college graduates are not able to find jobs after college (McDonalds is not a job for a college graduate), then moving back in with parents should be a way to conserve financial resources and help out aging parents. It should be a win-win situation. Maybe if your dating life is constricted by living at home, you should reconsider why you need to be out at 2am on a weeknight anyway...



I do not see a problem with the younger generation staying at home longer. It is tougher to make it in the world right now, especially with the job market the way it is. Perhaps, if more families lived together longer, then there would be more peace between the older and younger generations. But the pull of the secular world is great for many, and freedom from parental observation becomes worth it at any price, to be independent, to drink liberally and at will, and to engage in immoral behaviors over night. It is far better for the younger generation to lean a little bit more on parents or other family members than to lean on "friends" or others who may influence them poorly.
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Whoa!!!! Hold your horses, there!! If one is unemployed, McDonald's (and many other places, too) is indeed a job for a college graduate. A mature adult needs to do what's necessary when it's necessary.
Oct 5th 2012 new
(Quote) Edward-512961 said: Whoa!!!! Hold your horses, there!! If one is unemployed, McDonald's (and many other places, too) is i...
(Quote) Edward-512961 said:

Whoa!!!! Hold your horses, there!! If one is unemployed, McDonald's (and many other places, too) is indeed a job for a college graduate. A mature adult needs to do what's necessary when it's necessary.
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I have been at my current job 20 plus years, my son was nine months old when I took my position. For six months I worked at a Braums fourty plus minutes from where I lived, with a newborn at home this was not an easy task. Was it worth it? Yes it kept me from having to apply from government assisstance. I realize a lot of young and older people are having troubles in this economy but after seeing some of the application's lately it makes me wonder if people really want to work.....if you have and education whether it is a HS or college diploma and really want to work most people can find a job.... scratchchin
Oct 6th 2012 new

I agree. Life is really hard for a lot of singles and families right now. I'm lucky to have stable income and provide my own living for my son and my self. I think a lot of people are going back home and living with their parents/family. I don't have that option, however, my sister got divorced few months ago and she and her two kids are living with my parents. I can tell you one thing, my sister and I both learned! DO not MARRY outside the church!!! It's never going to work-especially when you have children. I think as long as they are doing everything they can to improve their situation, there is nothing wrong with it. biggrin

Oct 8th 2012 new

OH< i dread this. I am living with mom and dad. I thought i would be far from this situation and thought I am with my family....... I admit I kinda cringe if someone else were in this situation. OH.....what's wrong with them....but HEY I am there too.

It is a problem/concern_i understand and typically yeah....it's not favorable. However, since I am at home with parents....I do have compassion and have to put on my christian clothes of compassion, kindness and humility and try not to make judgement calls so quickly. Not everyone living with their parents/family is a person that has red flags.

I think I do have it posted on my profile-though there is an option of "get to know me first" which is pretty much AKA staying with parents.

I'm so with you on this....."living with parents!!!!!" but, I wouldn't and I pray that I am not judged or looked over because of it.

Oct 8th 2012 new

(Quote) Jenny-872030 said: You've been corresponding for a while when your Catholic Match dream guy or gal tells you tha...
(Quote) Jenny-872030 said:

You've been corresponding for a while when your Catholic Match dream guy or gal tells you that he or she is still living at home with mom and dad. How do you react?

Would you view this as a positive or negative?

Do you see it as an inability to be independent, or a smart way to save money?

Is there a certain age where you think it is just unwise to stay at home, unless a sick parent needs care?

Other thoughts?

Personally, I've been there. I lived at home for a year after I graduated from college, and didn't see a problem with it (at least short term). I know plenty of young adults who still live at home because it makes more sense financially, until they at least get out of debt. I know I did struggle a bit with being independent when I was living at home. I was under Mom and Dad's roof, so Mom and Dad's rules still applied. I couldn't go out without telling anyone where I was going. Now that I have my own place, I have really learned to appreciate the independence that comes with it.

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At my age, I would run from a guy that was not independent and financially stable. I've been on my own since 17 so even in a person's late 20s it seems like they should be independent.

My 24 year old son moved home from (22 - 24) to pay off student loans but we both agreed he needed to be off on his own by 25 at the latest. In July he decided to move to Arizona. He drove out there, landed a good job in Scottsdale 1 1/2 weeks later and has a nice apartment already. I've very proud of him but never doubted that he would make it work. Extremely resourceful kid I raised. scratchchin





Oct 8th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-617971 said: To be honest, I don't think most people here are moving out because friends have in...
(Quote) Matthew-617971 said:



To be honest, I don't think most people here are moving out because friends have influenced us poorly, or due to the pull of the secular world. I think everyone here has a diffrent set of reasons, but that they are based from a hopeful ambition to move closer to their goals. My reasons are: work and independance.

For work, I get up at four in the morning, four hours earlier than my parents need to get up. Even when I am on vaccation visiting, and I sleep in several hours, I am still up before they are. (Trust me, I am not, and I don't think most the CMers my age, are up at 2am on a weeknight.) For me, there is no need to wake my parents up in the middle of their night when I can afford to be on my own.

For me, and I believe for many of the other sincere Catholics I am growing to know on the fora, independence is not about getting a ticket to imorality. Rather, it is about challenging ourselves, and putting ourselves in position to become the men and women we want to be. Doing the little things right, from learning how to save for retirement to being able to cook not using the microwave, is part of growing up, and building the habits that are the seeds of someday creating trust between ourselves and that other person we are on this site searching for.

Jim forgive me if I sound angry, that is not what I am trying to go for. Also, I more than understand if someone is staying at home because of economic considerations, or to take home of a loved one. But for the specific case Jenny outlined, based on my personal experiance, I would still prefer if they moved outside of their parents home.

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clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:

Couldn't agree more!!!! [I would shovel (you know what) if it was the only way to remain independent. I also have noticed that there seem to be a number of jobs that are "beneath" people these days. Personally, I would do whatever it takes to take care of myself and my family (within the realm of moral, of course).]

Oct 8th 2012 new

(Quote) Sally-894891 said: I think ones culture is very important. In my culture we just don't move out untill marriage,...
(Quote) Sally-894891 said:

I think ones culture is very important. In my culture we just don't move out untill marriage, especially with girls. I also wonder if you're really independent and responsible when you live on your own. I find responsibility, independence and maturity in ones morals, values and intellect. It's just a roof over your head, doesn't make you immature. As for living with your parents and don't contribute to the household while you have a steady job, yes that's immature. Because your're missing the ability to put yourself in other peoples shoes, in my eyes it means their missing a thought of their own. I really don't think that living alone will help them develop one. I know to many people, especially men who live on their own let their mum do their laundry or still eat at their parents house etc.
I actually don't get why people want to run away from their family. I love it at home! It's always fun, loving, comfortable and I never feel alone. I wonder why I would ever trade it. marriage will be my next chapter in life and that is the point I truelly become a woman who will run her own houshold

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A wise priest told my father many years ago, if he did not move out of the house and live on his own for at least "x" amount of time, he would not perform a marriage ceremony for him and my mom.

Oct 8th 2012 new

(Quote) Sally-894891 said: I think ones culture is very important. In my culture we just don't move out untill marriage,...
(Quote) Sally-894891 said:

I think ones culture is very important. In my culture we just don't move out untill marriage, especially with girls. I also wonder if you're really independent and responsible when you live on your own. I find responsibility, independence and maturity in ones morals, values and intellect. It's just a roof over your head, doesn't make you immature. As for living with your parents and don't contribute to the household while you have a steady job, yes that's immature. Because your're missing the ability to put yourself in other peoples shoes, in my eyes it means their missing a thought of their own. I really don't think that living alone will help them develop one. I know to many people, especially men who live on their own let their mum do their laundry or still eat at their parents house etc.
I actually don't get why people want to run away from their family. I love it at home! It's always fun, loving, comfortable and I never feel alone. I wonder why I would ever trade it. marriage will be my next chapter in life and that is the point I truelly become a woman who will run her own houshold

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A wise priest told my father many years ago, if he did not move out of the house and live on his own for at least "x" amount of time, he would not perform a marriage ceremony for him and my mom.

Oct 8th 2012 new

(Quote) Sally-894891 said: I think ones culture is very important. In my culture we just don't move out untill marriage,...
(Quote) Sally-894891 said:

I think ones culture is very important. In my culture we just don't move out untill marriage, especially with girls. I also wonder if you're really independent and responsible when you live on your own. I find responsibility, independence and maturity in ones morals, values and intellect. It's just a roof over your head, doesn't make you immature. As for living with your parents and don't contribute to the household while you have a steady job, yes that's immature. Because your're missing the ability to put yourself in other peoples shoes, in my eyes it means their missing a thought of their own. I really don't think that living alone will help them develop one. I know to many people, especially men who live on their own let their mum do their laundry or still eat at their parents house etc.
I actually don't get why people want to run away from their family. I love it at home! It's always fun, loving, comfortable and I never feel alone. I wonder why I would ever trade it. marriage will be my next chapter in life and that is the point I truelly become a woman who will run her own houshold

--hide--



A wise priest told my father many years ago, if he did not move out of the house and live on his own for at least "x" amount of time, he would not perform a marriage ceremony for him and my mom.

Oct 8th 2012 new

It does all depend, but living on your own or with roommates while still single teaches you so much about yourself. Living with people who are not your parents and don't have to love you no matter what I think helps you understand others better and how to live in a relationship where the residents are all on the same level, verses living in a house where your parents are clearly (and rightly) in control of the goings on of the home.

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