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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people 45+. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is told in chapters 11-25 of the book of Genesis.
Learn More:Abraham & Sarah

10/19/2012 new

(Quote) Carolyn-896104 said: Theresa, Don't give up. I am 53 and never married. I would have loved to have been ...
(Quote) Carolyn-896104 said:

Theresa,

Don't give up. I am 53 and never married. I would have loved to have been married with children. You have had both of these gifts in your life.

I will never give up. God has plans for me I know. This is one of my favorite quotes from Jerimiah:

Jerimiah 29: 11 For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the Lord,
plans for your welfare, not for woe!, plans to give you a future full of hope.

--hide--



Carolyn, that is my favorite verse, too! It is what helped me through the divorce. I read it every day and my favorite Bibke is still in my room open to that verse. :)

10/19/2012 new

(Quote) Theresa-722703 said: Maybe I can go when Janna is in school if they meet then. It is just not cost effective to get a babys...
(Quote) Theresa-722703 said: Maybe I can go when Janna is in school if they meet then. It is just not cost effective to get a babysitter and go to a meeting and have to decide what bills don't get paid. I already have medical bills for Janna that I am on payment plans for the next year. Both the local hospital and Children's Hospital in Denver.

Yeah I know. I have looked into some options but it always comes out to time and money.

We have enough to live on until last month's car accident that has put me behind for a few months. So we are watching where we spend money for two to three months. Then we are okay again.
--hide--


Theresa, don't give up! Strange things happen all the time and you don't really know what God has in store for you. Men become widowers too and sometimes they're young and have small children too. Maybe you'll find a man out there who's looking also for a nice woman that can help him raise his kids. Usually men are a little more lost when left with young children to raise, than women, and, yes, there is a guy out there looking precisely for someone like you. Have faith.


I'm 63, I just became a widow 2 years ago; I have no obligations except to God and myself and I'm still scared to death of finding a guy that wants to spend time with me and dating, but I don't want to spend the rest of my life alone. I had a healthy, loving relationship with my husband for 35 years and I know there's someone out there that would like to be with me and I with him. I have to have faith, and I do.

10/19/2012 new

(Quote) Peter-449116 said: Yep, sent you a note~
(Quote) Peter-449116 said:

Yep, sent you a note~

--hide--
Thanks Peter. I'm on the case. Just need to find someone to take new pics in different lighting. hug rose

10/19/2012 new

(Quote) Linda-624584 said: So Peter, as a professional in the photography industry, any suggestions for me??
(Quote) Linda-624584 said:

So Peter, as a professional in the photography industry, any suggestions for me??

--hide--
I've posted the same advice on CM at least four times in the last year. You're the first person who responded to it- most obviously don't see it as a problem. I maintain a poor quality photograph as a profile picture will be skipped over. Yours, although somewhat overexposed, would be an exception. I was not hijacking the original poster's thread, but was just trying to help!

I think CM moderators should offer similar advice- especially the sunglasses thing. Eyes are the first thing folks notice!

10/19/2012 new

(Quote) Theresa-722703 said: I will probably delete my profile in December when it comes due. Some guys actually say in their profi...
(Quote) Theresa-722703 said: I will probably delete my profile in December when it comes due. Some guys actually say in their profile that they don't want kids at home. I can respect that. I used to feel that way until I got pregnant at the age of forty. there are less men out there the older I get and then I have my little girl. I think that I probably won't date until she is a lot older but then I might decide that I don't want a guy around telling me what to do! I do have to say that my first marriage was almost ideal. I recently told someone that if i could have him back I think I would do it. Just him, I wouldn't ask for the money, I wouldn't ask for the house, the cars, all the physical trappings. Just him. We could start over and it would be fine with me. But as my mom would say, If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. Since he passed away, I have moved on. I think I made my point. Now I have my daughter and she will be the center of my life for now.
--hide--


Theresa, It is hard to live the life we have, especially when we have lost what seems was the better life. You are intelligent and articulate. You know what you want, what you have, what is important as well as the common sense to seek out what is good for you and your daughter. I raised my son by myself through no plan of my own. Today at 63 I am still single. It is a constant exercise in acceptance, and truly a deepinging of my reliance on God. I too was disappointed to find such a lack of response from this site and was glad to be able to discuss it here in the coffee shop on Sunday mornings. I was done with CM. It has taken time but I still come here, not as much for the dating, even though I keep my toe in the pool, but for the sense of well being and normalcy I feel because I am not alone. I am not alone in my struggles as a catholic woman. I am not alone as a single senior, l am not alone in my aloness. It doesn't sound like much and last year at this time it would not have called it a richness. Probably because I have grown in acceptance. I could say that is all I need, but to grasp that as a continuum probably requires the same type of discipline as an aged marriage. So today my trust in God grows, even as my life continues outside of my prefernces. I live in an area that was geographically isolated too and was in no situation to move. Now some things have changed, including me, but the older I get the fewer prospects appear. Having said that, I believe that once you do your best, the rest is up to God. The same God that brought you two husbands is the same God that will open the door to your next resolution. Now I am not saying, you shouldn't pack it up, pick it up and move to a place you believe God has planned for you, but when I did that, due to the terrible repercussions on my son, I wish I had not. I said that to say that as we age, the lessons become harder and the resolution seems to take longer. I don't always like the way God manages my life but still it is better then the options. So my slogan is: Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.

10/19/2012 new

[quote]Peter-449116 said:

I've posted the same advice on CM at least four times in the last year. You're the first person who responded to it- most obviously don't see it as a problem. I maintain a poor quality photograph as a profile picture will be skipped over. Yours, although somewhat overexposed, would be an exception. I was not hijacking the original poster's thread, but was just trying to help!

I think CM moderators should offer similar advice- especially the sunglasses thing.[ Eyes are the first thing folks notce!]
Okay Peter, I would appreciate some input if you would be so kind. I need, I know, a good photo. I am reading the directions for a new camera tonight. I have heard that your face should be from the front. I am especially broad faced so is that true for me also? I heard your clue about the eyes and natural lighting when possible. I know that make up is good and that it is better to be looking up at least a pinch rather then looking down into the camera. If I knew how to find your previous advice I would but instead I will hope for your response.

10/26/2012 new
(Quote) Peter-449116 said: I've posted the same advice on CM at least four times in the last year. You're the first person who res...
(Quote) Peter-449116 said:

I've posted the same advice on CM at least four times in the last year. You're the first person who responded to it- most obviously don't see it as a problem. I maintain a poor quality photograph as a profile picture will be skipped over. Yours, although somewhat overexposed, would be an exception. I was not hijacking the original poster's thread, but was just trying to help!



I think CM moderators should offer similar advice- especially the sunglasses thing. Eyes are the first thing folks notice!

--hide--


The glasses are for vision. The VA automatically makes the glasses for all of us Veterans with the transitions lenses. If we tell them you want clear, they do their best to talk us out of the clear lenses. I don't even realize that they are changing anymore.
10/26/2012 new
(Quote) Barb-697255 said: Theresa, It is hard to live the life we have, especially when we have lost what seems was the better l...
(Quote) Barb-697255 said:



Theresa, It is hard to live the life we have, especially when we have lost what seems was the better life. You are intelligent and articulate. You know what you want, what you have, what is important as well as the common sense to seek out what is good for you and your daughter. I raised my son by myself through no plan of my own. Today at 63 I am still single. It is a constant exercise in acceptance, and truly a deepinging of my reliance on God. I too was disappointed to find such a lack of response from this site and was glad to be able to discuss it here in the coffee shop on Sunday mornings. I was done with CM. It has taken time but I still come here, not as much for the dating, even though I keep my toe in the pool, but for the sense of well being and normalcy I feel because I am not alone. I am not alone in my struggles as a catholic woman. I am not alone as a single senior, l am not alone in my aloness. It doesn't sound like much and last year at this time it would not have called it a richness. Probably because I have grown in acceptance. I could say that is all I need, but to grasp that as a continuum probably requires the same type of discipline as an aged marriage. So today my trust in God grows, even as my life continues outside of my prefernces. I live in an area that was geographically isolated too and was in no situation to move. Now some things have changed, including me, but the older I get the fewer prospects appear. Having said that, I believe that once you do your best, the rest is up to God. The same God that brought you two husbands is the same God that will open the door to your next resolution. Now I am not saying, you shouldn't pack it up, pick it up and move to a place you believe God has planned for you, but when I did that, due to the terrible repercussions on my son, I wish I had not. I said that to say that as we age, the lessons become harder and the resolution seems to take longer. I don't always like the way God manages my life but still it is better then the options. So my slogan is: Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.

--hide--


I am not giving up completely. I just think that the expense of staying here on CM is too much right now. I have Janna's medical bills to deal with and I am reworking my budget. I figure that when Janna is a bit older, I can think about dating again. I am just leaving it in God's hands and telling him that he can do whatever he wants.
10/26/2012 new

(Quote) Theresa-722703 said: Okay I am getting that feeling again that I am wasting my time. I am 46 and both of my previous husban...
(Quote) Theresa-722703 said: Okay I am getting that feeling again that I am wasting my time. I am 46 and both of my previous husbands have passed away. Guys see that and run in the opposite direction. There are a couple who look further. Those couple see six year old child and they run.

Every so often I get the feeling that I am wasting my time. Don't say "There are plenty of guys out there who are in our age group and willing to start over." Oh did I mention that I will never be able to have any more children? Younger guys want more children, and we have little in common. Older guys I can talk to and relate to, they don't want kids.

I am just getting that feeling that I am wasting my time. Oh did I mention that I got the matched email? I emoted several of the guys and no answer. Same thing different day.
--hide--


It sounds like you've already made up your mind about this issue, so in essence you have answered your own question. I would disagree with you otherwise and say, that yes, there are some men out there that may have young children as well, and may not mind connecting with a woman that has a child and becoming a one big happy family. It sounds like you're looking for validation that you are right, that there are no men out there who can possibly want you, and I respectfully think you're wrong.

11/29/2012 new

[quote]Theresa-722703 said: Okay I am getting that feeling again that I am wasting my time. I am 46 and both of my previous husbands have passed away. Guys see that and run in the opposite direction. There are a couple who look further. Those couple see six year old child and they run.

Every so often I get the feeling that I am wasting my time. Don't say "There are plenty of guys out there who are in our age group and willing to start over." Oh did I mention that I will never be able to have any more children? Younger guys want more children, and we have little in common. Older guys I can talk to and relate to, they don't want kids.

I am just getting that feeling that I am wasting my time. Oh did I mention that I got the matched email? I emoted several of the guys and no answer. Same thing different day.





[Hi Theresa. I met my girlfriend here one year ago. She is 3 years older and has 5 kids (count 'em 5) it will happen. Trust me.]

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