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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Nov 9th 2012 new

Seek God first and His kingdom and the rest will come unto thee....or so i believe. I believe any person (man and woman) ought to seek God first and obey His commandments ...when you do so, you shall find the spouse you are looking for. Respect God and respect yourself as an image of God and surely He will unite you in His own timing with the one He has in mind for you.

Nov 9th 2012 new
John, I guess in thinking about it, yes a phone call could be considered an intermediate step until the face to face meeting can occur. I still think it will take time to build trust no matter what the form of communication. So yes picking up the phone here and there is a great idea!
Nov 9th 2012 new

(Quote) Anna-671172 said: Seek God first and His kingdom and the rest will come unto thee....or so i believe. I believe any ...
(Quote) Anna-671172 said:

Seek God first and His kingdom and the rest will come unto thee....or so i believe. I believe any person (man and woman) ought to seek God first and obey His commandments ...when you do so, you shall find the spouse you are looking for. Respect God and respect yourself as an image of God and surely He will unite you in His own timing with the one He has in mind for you.

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I don't think that those words mean that God will bring a mate into our lives if we do nothing but obey the commandments.

If I say to myself, "Well, there is no commandment to get married and so as long as I do all the things that are commanded, the right woman will be delivered by UPS (when I'm not home, of course irked ) even though I take no action to meet the ladies."

Wondering whether UPS will require that I sign for her or will just leave her leaning against the wall in the lobby, mischievous eyebrow

John

Nov 9th 2012 new

(Quote) Nora-914810 said: John, I guess in thinking about it, yes a phone call could be considered an intermediate step until the f...
(Quote) Nora-914810 said: John, I guess in thinking about it, yes a phone call could be considered an intermediate step until the face to face meeting can occur. I still think it will take time to build trust no matter what the form of communication. So yes picking up the phone here and there is a great idea!
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Nora,

I'd agree. Sometime the voice can reveal more than that face.

John

Nov 10th 2012 new

(Quote) John-184825 said: Even though the traits needed to gain the respect of men are not exactly the same as the qualities...
(Quote) John-184825 said:

Even though the traits needed to gain the respect of men are not exactly the same as the qualities required to win the heart of a woman, is it unlikely that a man who hasn't earned the respect of men will possess the package of characteristics needed to capture the love of a woman?

This is what blogger Luke Ford ( http://www.lukeford.net) said to men in this regard on November 4, 2012?

If you don’t have a woman in your life, the primary problem is likely not in how you interact with women, but in how you interact with men. If you are respected and admired by other men, the women will come. If you’re not, they won’t.

What do you think? Is this the missing "link" to the "pink"?

Wondering whether shouting, "Amen, amen, amen", over and over will make women more amenable,

John

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I didn't read the article, but I agree with the premise. To me it seems respect of men and being attractive to women are linked. It all has to do with being a man and have masculine qualities that are tempered by virtue. Men recognize that in other men and respect because they know that that's how they want to be and that it's honorable. Women see these qualities and become attracted because these qualities is what they desire.

Nov 10th 2012 new

(Quote) Dan-656122 said: I didn't read the article, but I agree with the premise. To me it seems respect of men ...
(Quote) Dan-656122 said:



I didn't read the article, but I agree with the premise. To me it seems respect of men and being attractive to women are linked. It all has to do with being a man and have masculine qualities that are tempered by virtue. Men recognize that in other men and respect because they know that that's how they want to be and that it's honorable. Women see these qualities and become attracted because these qualities is what they desire.

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Thanks for a well-rounded answer. Now let's see whether some of the ladies reply to you with, "I agree" or "What he said".

Nov 10th 2012 new
Dan, Yes I completely agree with your statement that a man should have "masculine qualities tempered by virtue". There is always a certain draw to the alpha male but there has to be more than what meets the eye to pull on the heart strings. Just my opinion....
Nov 10th 2012 new

(Quote) Dan-656122 said: I didn't read the article, but I agree with the premise. To me it seems respect of men ...
(Quote) Dan-656122 said:



I didn't read the article, but I agree with the premise. To me it seems respect of men and being attractive to women are linked. It all has to do with being a man and have masculine qualities that are tempered by virtue. Men recognize that in other men and respect because they know that that's how they want to be and that it's honorable. Women see these qualities and become attracted because these qualities is what they desire.

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I agree.

Nov 10th 2012 new

(Quote) Michael-613631 said: I do not seek the respect of other men because so many I know have no faith. I try to live by example ...
(Quote) Michael-613631 said: I do not seek the respect of other men because so many I know have no faith. I try to live by example for them but not to gain their respect. I feel that it is respecting and loving yourself that draws confidence. People respond to confidence but though it is attractive it is but another piece to the mystery of why you like someone or don't
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Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company.
George Washington

Agreed

Nov 10th 2012 new

(Quote) Dan-656122 said: I didn't read the article, but I agree with the premise. To me it seems respect of men ...
(Quote) Dan-656122 said:



I didn't read the article, but I agree with the premise. To me it seems respect of men and being attractive to women are linked. It all has to do with being a man and have masculine qualities that are tempered by virtue. Men recognize that in other men and respect because they know that that's how they want to be and that it's honorable. Women see these qualities and become attracted because these qualities is what they desire.

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The respect of what group of men? I think the characteristics of the group has bearing. A man might be respected by his gang of Hell's Angels or of mobsters; this may be attractive to a certain group of women, and then "virtue" has little to do with it.

Even in a Christian circle, there are exceptions of sorts. As Christians are still sinners and imperfect, despite having traditionally honorable qualities, mistakes can be made. The "judging" (so to speak) group of men may not respect, or seem to respect, a particular man for some reasons that are not of the particular man so much as the reasons are a part of the flaws of the judging group. The group could have misinterpreted the man in some way, or they have unacknowledged prejudices or jealousies which have influenced their feeling toward the man.

The same, a group of men could have been fooled by a particular man, feel respect for him, and yet the man has qualities which make him much less than respectable.

It's all very complicated and confusing sometimes. I think all we can do is our best at the moment, know we'll make mistakes in judgment in both ways (not like someone good and like someone not so good), and we just go on.

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