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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Nov 18th 2012 new

(Quote) Mary-251045 said: This is a very old fashioned question - some women with a large family might not have the time to ...
(Quote) Mary-251045 said:

This is a very old fashioned question - some women with a large family might not have the time to fit in their own interests but would like to

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This IS and VERY OLD Fashioned question- You are right. I KNOW there are women all throughout history who never had a free sorry minute to think let alone be interested in any interests.

Nov 18th 2012 new

(Quote) Marian-83994 said: Should a woman have her own interests or should she only be interested in food and cooking? Shoul...
(Quote) Marian-83994 said:

Should a woman have her own interests or should she only be interested in food and cooking? Should she only be interested in the home?
What does anyone think about this? Please share your thoughts ladies and gentlemen. Are men in favor of a woman who has outside interests and wants to pursue those interests?

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I kinda did assume this was at least partially a joke- but I'm throwing 2 cents in regardless :) I'll go on record as saying that food and cooking are one of my "own interests" (particularly when it comes to perfecting my pizza-making skills). I have even read technical books like "The Bread Builders", about the science of bread-making and oven-building. At this point, it pretty much is an outside interest because one of my dreams is to build a firebrick oven, which as a project would distract me from running the house, even if I hired someone to do most of the work, and would not be cheap (well, who knows in this economy, construction is down so maybe materials will get cheaper).
Someone earlier in the thread made a great comment about women wanting all those skills to be seen as gifts that we bring to the table, not as prerequisites. Outside interests really need to be compatible with the type of relationship that you want, as well as something that your s/o can respect if not actually enjoy. For example: Don't date someone who thinks tattoos are a "good investment" if you don't agree with them...

Nov 18th 2012 new

I think men's ideas of what a woman should be comes in all shapes & sizes just as a woman's idea of wheat her man should be comes in all shapes & sizes. Hey...if a man doesn't want an independent woman, so be it. He'll find someone for him... I have a friend that married a more controlling type & they both seem quite happy. To each his own. I will be true to myself, however, and my interests. Hopefully they will blend right in with someone else one of these days!


It's a wonderful thing that we are all so different....just makes it kinda hard when you're hoping to find your unique match! :)

Nov 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Marian-83994 said: Should a woman have her own interests or should she only be interested in food and cooking? Shoul...
(Quote) Marian-83994 said:

Should a woman have her own interests or should she only be interested in food and cooking? Should she only be interested in the home?
What does anyone think about this? Please share your thoughts ladies and gentlemen. Are men in favor of a woman who has outside interests and wants to pursue those interests?

Are men happy when they meet a woman who has hobbies and interests or do they automatically think of redirecting her attention to him in every way? be honest...

A fine fellow here mentioned that when he heard the word independence from a woman, it had a meaning that struck a chord with him due to his experiences.

Please share and comment.. THANK YOU!!!

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I went back to the beginning of this thread to remember how it all started with the word 'independence' and sensing all along while reading that I have to share the following poem with everyone. I think the world has changed yet again and with that change many have a different perception of the meaning of the word.

I think most of us would love to Share the load AND each other's interests rather than go it alone.

Clara: In the Post Office
Linda Hasselstrom

I keep telling you, I'm not a feminist.
I grew up an only child on a ranch,
so I drove tractors, learned to ride.
When the truck wouldn't start, I went to town
for parts. The man behind the counter
told me I couldn't rebuild a carburetor.
I could: every carburetor on the place. That's
necessity, not feminism.
I learned to do the books
after my husband left me and the debts
and the children. I shoveled snow and pitched hay
when the hired man didn't come to work.
I learned how to pull a calf
when the vet was too busy. As I thought,
the cow did most of it herself; they've been
birthing alone for ten thousand years. Does
that make them feminists?
It's not
that I don't like men; I love them - when I can.
But I've stopped counting on them
to change my flats or open my doors.
That's not feminism; that's just good sense.


Would the women who went west on wagon trains be considered independent? I suppose if they went without a husband......

Nov 19th 2012 new

Marian, I think you and I have run into men who will listen to a woman talk about her own interests for just so long and then redirect the conversation to themselves more often than we might like or is 'normal' in a healthy relationship. And, yes, it usually means a self centeredness that would lead to an unhealthy, unbalanced or non existant shared relationship.
Sad, but that is what happens when we are open to who ever God places in our walk, we meet and 'get to' talk with lots of different kinds of people, not necessarily the kinds we want to have in our life for fullfilling friendships or a lasting love in life.
(but maybe they are there for other purposes in God's plans.............IF we only knew what those were!! darn Him, He doesn't always fill us in.) hug wave

Nov 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Karen-712407 said: Marian, I think you and I have run into men who will listen to a woman talk about her own interes...
(Quote) Karen-712407 said:

Marian, I think you and I have run into men who will listen to a woman talk about her own interests for just so long and then redirect the conversation to themselves more often than we might like or is 'normal' in a healthy relationship. And, yes, it usually means a self centeredness that would lead to an unhealthy, unbalanced or non existant shared relationship.
Sad, but that is what happens when we are open to who ever God places in our walk, we meet and 'get to' talk with lots of different kinds of people, not necessarily the kinds we want to have in our life for fullfilling friendships or a lasting love in life.
(but maybe they are there for other purposes in God's plans.............IF we only knew what those were!! darn Him, He doesn't always fill us in.)

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Maybe they are there because God saw they needed to encounter you so they could learn to listen to God better than they have.

Nov 19th 2012 new

Thank you John! And I have learned from them also, to see my own faults and insecurities too! It is almost always a two way street!

Nov 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Karen-712407 said: Thank you John! And I have learned from them also, to see my own faults and inse...
(Quote) Karen-712407 said:

Thank you John! And I have learned from them also, to see my own faults and insecurities too! It is almost always a two way street!

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I will have to think about what both you and John have said. Very interesting and probably right on!

Nov 20th 2012 new

Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip are celebrating their 65th anniversary. I heard this quote from Prince Philip:

"It's the secret of a happy marriage to have different interests."

Nov 20th 2012 new

(Quote) John-132457 said: Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip are celebrating their 65th anniversary. I heard this quote from ...
(Quote) John-132457 said:

Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip are celebrating their 65th anniversary. I heard this quote from Prince Philip:

"It's the secret of a happy marriage to have different interests."

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Depending on temperaments, having some different interests gives them an opportunity to be apart for awhile. For many, too much togetherness can be stifiling. For others, any separation is misery.

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