praying for you & your son..
May God continue giving you the strength and wisdom needed to deal with this situation.
I know that the Blessed Mother is with you and comforting you. I will continue to pray. I was a single parent and I survived. Believe it or not things will get better. This too shall pass. Know that God loves your son even more than you do.
One of the things I learned after my husband died was that children around the age of 10-14 process grief differently than adults. If there were problems before (anger, ocd, etc.) it intensifies with grief. They want to be normal, like everyone else and losing a parent makes them feel abnormal. It draws attention to them that they don't want. Obsession with electronics is a way of escaping. It is enough of a distraction that it helps block out the feelings and emotions. I have two teens. The way they handled grief was not the way I did. I often thought they didn't even care, yet they were just trying to be like their friends. They didn't even let anybody know their dad had died. My fear with the iPad would be having immediate access to ybe internet and undesirable information. At fourteen, my son has his phone fused to his hand. It is his cobnection to the world. It gives him status.
I know there are good doctors in this state that can help with counseling and treatment. And this is a powerful group of prayer warriors, so it is good you have our support. One thing that I think made a huge difference for my children was when I attended a Mom's In Touch prayer group. We met weekly to pray for our children, their teachers and their schools. At a year and a half, you are still early into your journey of grief. I can only imagine that having a child suffering as your's is adds so much sadness to an already exhausted parent. I know my kids did well because of the prayers from my friends. Hearing others pray aloud for my children helped me as much as them.
Take good care,
I will keep you in my prayers.. just remember to take care of yourself. It's easy to blame ourselves and to grieve ourselves into a shadow of our former selves. I know how that can be. It is a heartbreak but a Mother's love and the Love of our Lord is what will carry you... I am so glad to hear he is in a place where he can receive help and keep safe and you as well. I hope they offered you supportive counseling as well... Mothers of children with mental illness need much love and care. I hope someone mentioned NAMI to you. It can help. take care, and God Bless, Mary