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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

My ex and I were married in the Lutheran church 25 years ago. A few months before we divorced (not my choice) he enrolled in RCIA and converted to Catholicism. We convalidated our marriage and I found put a month later that he'd been having an affair the whole time he was making these changes. Then we divorced because he wanted to marry his paramour. Her father took an online minister course, passed it and married them. Then they kept going to the Catholic church and repeatedly received communion (which the kids knew was wrong. This man is a dedicated physician and a VP of our regional medical center. Why did he convalidated our marriage when he was screwing around? It sure would've been easier for me if the marriage hadn't been convalidated. What the heck was that????? Just felt like complaining'.
Nov 29th 2012 new

(Quote) Julie-909449 said: My ex and I were married in the Lutheran church 25 years ago. A few months before we divorced (not my ch...
(Quote) Julie-909449 said: My ex and I were married in the Lutheran church 25 years ago. A few months before we divorced (not my choice) he enrolled in RCIA and converted to Catholicism. We convalidated our marriage and I found put a month later that he'd been having an affair the whole time he was making these changes. Then we divorced because he wanted to marry his paramour. Her father took an online minister course, passed it and married them. Then they kept going to the Catholic church and repeatedly received communion (which the kids knew was wrong. This man is a dedicated physician and a VP of our regional medical center. Why did he convalidated our marriage when he was screwing around? It sure would've been easier for me if the marriage hadn't been convalidated. What the heck was that????? Just felt like complaining'.
--hide--
Julie, I hope you talk with a priest about all this, if you haven't already. hug

Nov 29th 2012 new

Julie,

I really don't know why people manipulate like this. I'm very sorry this happened to you. hug Praying

Nov 30th 2012 new

I actually went to the priest that convalidated the marriage. He was every bit as perplexed as I was.

Nov 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Julie-909449 said: I actually went to the priest that convalidated the marriage. He was every bit as perplexed as I ...
(Quote) Julie-909449 said:

I actually went to the priest that convalidated the marriage. He was every bit as perplexed as I was.

--hide--



Julie,


Go to the Diocese Tribunal, or an annulment advocate at your church (not necessarily the priest who convalidated your marriage), and start the annulment process. The most important factor in granting the annulment is what happened (and the state of minds, and intent) at the time of the wedding ceremony (and convalidation). It appears that he had no intention of proceeding in a sacramental marriage (as in remaining faithful to his spouse), so it looks like you have a strong case. If either of you were Catholic when you married in the Lutheran church, and did not have dispensation from a Catholic priest to marry outside of the Church, then you would need a simple "lack of form" annulment, which only takes a few months to process. In any event, go ahead and GET STARTED! The sooner that you put this behind you, the better for you going forward! rose

Nov 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Julie-909449 said: My ex and I were married in the Lutheran church 25 years ago. A few months before we divorced (not my ch...
(Quote) Julie-909449 said: My ex and I were married in the Lutheran church 25 years ago. A few months before we divorced (not my choice) he enrolled in RCIA and converted to Catholicism. We convalidated our marriage and I found put a month later that he'd been having an affair the whole time he was making these changes. Then we divorced because he wanted to marry his paramour. Her father took an online minister course, passed it and married them. Then they kept going to the Catholic church and repeatedly received communion (which the kids knew was wrong. This man is a dedicated physician and a VP of our regional medical center. Why did he convalidated our marriage when he was screwing around? It sure would've been easier for me if the marriage hadn't been convalidated. What the heck was that????? Just felt like complaining'.
--hide--


He had some serious problems. What he does now is nothing for you to worry about. He's made his own bed, let him lie in it. Move on.


Be happy. God has a wonderful plan for you. Trust Him.

Nov 30th 2012 new

Julie,

Please go to the Tribunal and give all of the details to them. It appears that his intent was not to have a faithful Catholic marriage and I believe that is an impediment and therefore you can get an annulment. Just my perspective from a little bit of experience, though not quite the same as yours. It's the state of mind of the person involved at the time of the marriage. I pray that he will be honest with the Tribunal and if not please do your research and get as many people to witness for you about this knowledge so that you will succeed. Best success and prayers for you.

Eloise

theheart

Nov 30th 2012 new

Thanks Kathy anf Eloise-


There shouldn't be any trouble with the annulment It's already started and I don't anticipate any problems from my ex. I believe he'll be truthful. At first, I didn't want an annulment (I am Catholic. he wasn't when we were 1st married), But now I'm looking at it from the time of convalidation which was a sham and I want it annulled (there was no dispensation for the Lutheran marriage). Anyhow, the whole thing was appallingly weird to me and I want to see what otherts think and maybe get some insight. It's so unreal. We were married for 20 years and I know affairs happen but I've never heard of anything like this.

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