I actually went to the priest that convalidated the marriage. He was every bit as perplexed as I was.
Go to the Diocese Tribunal, or an annulment advocate at your church (not necessarily the priest who convalidated your marriage), and start the annulment process. The most important factor in granting the annulment is what happened (and the state of minds, and intent) at the time of the wedding ceremony (and convalidation). It appears that he had no intention of proceeding in a sacramental marriage (as in remaining faithful to his spouse), so it looks like you have a strong case. If either of you were Catholic when you married in the Lutheran church, and did not have dispensation from a Catholic priest to marry outside of the Church, then you would need a simple "lack of form" annulment, which only takes a few months to process. In any event, go ahead and GET STARTED! The sooner that you put this behind you, the better for you going forward!
He had some serious problems. What he does now is nothing for you to worry about. He's made his own bed, let him lie in it. Move on.
Be happy. God has a wonderful plan for you. Trust Him.
Please go to the Tribunal and give all of the details to them. It appears that his intent was not to have a faithful Catholic marriage and I believe that is an impediment and therefore you can get an annulment. Just my perspective from a little bit of experience, though not quite the same as yours. It's the state of mind of the person involved at the time of the marriage. I pray that he will be honest with the Tribunal and if not please do your research and get as many people to witness for you about this knowledge so that you will succeed. Best success and prayers for you.
Thanks Kathy anf Eloise-
There shouldn't be any trouble with the annulment It's already started and I don't anticipate any problems from my ex. I believe he'll be truthful. At first, I didn't want an annulment (I am Catholic. he wasn't when we were 1st married), But now I'm looking at it from the time of convalidation which was a sham and I want it annulled (there was no dispensation for the Lutheran marriage). Anyhow, the whole thing was appallingly weird to me and I want to see what otherts think and maybe get some insight. It's so unreal. We were married for 20 years and I know affairs happen but I've never heard of anything like this.