Believe it or not, I was the same way - bullied in school (short and small = easy target), alcoholic dad, not much of a social life/outlet. People even told me that when I enlisted in the Army, I wouldn't survive Basic Training.
Now, fast-forward to the present, and I've been a student senator (college), become an officer, COMMANDED a basic training company, ran an emergency operations center covering the SE U.S., and my last evaluation stated I should be promoted as soon as possible to lieutenant colonel and would be an excellent battalion commander (comments from a two-star general). Every time I try to stay put and be satisfied with life, God comes along and takes me for a ride.
But unfortunately I've had no success with relationships. My last serious one was in 1997, the woman I planned to marry. I've concluded that God wants to bless my efforts, but needs me to work on me first and quit obsessing over the hope/dream of marriage and family. So for the time being I just relax and enjoy the ride.
And, like you, my only two existences in life were the military and church communities. Since then, I've expanded my horizons, joining social networks with like-minded people (try meetup.com). Living solely in the Church community was wearing me out; sometimes it can be unhealthy depending on the environment.
Although I'd like to marry a Catholic woman, I won't limit myself any longer, and will go out and enjoy life no matter what. Having been deployed overseas really changes your perspective. I'm no longer going to be concerned about what Mass is correct and whether or not my attire is good enough. Others can judge me and have their opinions. I only care what God thinks.
And I'm not ashamed to admit that I've sought counseling to deal with my issues. Everyone knows that there is a stigma to that, especially in the military, but it's worked wonders for me. And I truly believe God led me to that point because He loves me and wants me to be happy and whole.
One last note: I attended Mass at St. Joseph's in Marietta, GA two years ago, and there was this older gentleman, mentally challenged (I hope I used the correct respectful term), who saw me in the hallway afterward. He was high on life. He and I had never met, but I'll never forget what he told me, out of the blue: "Don't give up; don't ever give up." I felt he was relaying a message from the Father, an angel in real life. I hold on to that memory whenever I get discouraged. I hope you will, too.