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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

irked Why cant it be about the kids? why arent the kids worth some time? maybe even taking them to a movie? SUre its Christmas, but thats ok.

Last year, Dad came by the house for an hour, no gifts (which is fine, $ is short, although he will NEVER be without his cell or smokes) and the kids saw him ( the younger two of mine age 10, 11 at the time) it was "something"...

Yes they have seen him maybe 2-4xs tops this past year but its CHRISTMAS?! I cant fathom this going on year after year. No word from him. No call yet no txt...Its always an unpredictable mystery. Its so sad for my children, sad for me...

Looking for prayers, hugs, from anyone who can relate....

feeling lousy,,,sad

Dec 25th 2012 new
(Quote) Rebecca-767861 said: Why cant it be about the kids? why arent the kids worth some time? maybe even taking them to a movie? SUre i...
(Quote) Rebecca-767861 said:

Why cant it be about the kids? why arent the kids worth some time? maybe even taking them to a movie? SUre its Christmas, but thats ok.

Last year, Dad came by the house for an hour, no gifts (which is fine, $ is short, although he will NEVER be without his cell or smokes) and the kids saw him ( the younger two of mine age 10, 11 at the time) it was "something"...

Yes they have seen him maybe 2-4xs tops this past year but its CHRISTMAS?! I cant fathom this going on year after year. No word from him. No call yet no txt...Its always an unpredictable mystery. Its so sad for my children, sad for me...

Looking for prayers, hugs, from anyone who can relate....

feeling lousy,,,

--hide--


My niece goes through therewith her ex. The man is so immature he cannot wrap his head around the fact that it is not about him, but about. y great niece. This year he has her for a week. I am praying it is a good time for. her.

God bless you and your dear children, the hurt that comes from the feelings of abandonment carry into adulthood.
Dec 25th 2012 new
Praying
Dec 25th 2012 new
(Quote) Rebecca-767861 said: Why cant it be about the kids? why arent the kids worth some time? maybe even taking them to a movie? SUre i...
(Quote) Rebecca-767861 said:

Why cant it be about the kids? why arent the kids worth some time? maybe even taking them to a movie? SUre its Christmas, but thats ok.

Last year, Dad came by the house for an hour, no gifts (which is fine, $ is short, although he will NEVER be without his cell or smokes) and the kids saw him ( the younger two of mine age 10, 11 at the time) it was "something"...

Yes they have seen him maybe 2-4xs tops this past year but its CHRISTMAS?! I cant fathom this going on year after year. No word from him. No call yet no txt...Its always an unpredictable mystery. Its so sad for my children, sad for me...

Looking for prayers, hugs, from anyone who can relate....

feeling lousy,,,

--hide--


hug my son 'found his biological Father' when he the summer before his 21st birthday. He had not seen my son since Andrew was ten months old before that time. Andrew bonded with another of his Dads kids but I could count on one hand the number of times Andrew saw his Dad and those times were because I had told my son he could go visit as often as he cared to. I saw more if his Dad the week my son was in a coma than I had seen him in 22 years. And his Dad chose not to attend the funeral I planned.

You have my prayers, your kids are the ones affected the most. Please get professional advice or advice from your Priest in dealing with your kids emotions, and your own. Sending you my hugs today and my prayers. hug hug
Dec 25th 2012 new
Prayers to you and your children. This is such a tough time of year. I had a couple good cries myself today! Some people just don't know how to love
Dec 26th 2012 new
I'm sorry to hear of your issue. It's a shame to hear that being local a father can't bond with the kids. I stayed in my relationship so long for the kids. But found out that was not any good. I fought for 50/50 custody because my kids are my world. I guess what I'm saying is that there are still good guys out there that will love you and your kids. I will say a prayer for you and the kidos. Peace
Dec 26th 2012 new

thank you for all the prayers and thoughts heart

Dec 27th 2012 new

Hey -

Your kids will be O.K. I know you are sad for them.


My son's father has almost never been involved. But, my son has my family, and he has developed a large network at his church of supportive males.

No, it is not optimal, ad yes, it makes you sad, but my son is 17. He has some contact with his father now, but he is a happy, well adjusted guy, and I am proud of him.


Your kids will survive because they have you, and you love them enough to hurt for them. Praying

Jan 5th 2013 new

Just read your post. Prayers to your familyPraying .
I hope your husband starts to realize what he's missing out on.

Jan 6th 2013 new
Rebecca, hearing your story brings me back to a Christmas Day about 18 years ago. My children were about 9, 8, and 4. My brother would take the children to their dad's house after we opened the presents on Christmas morning. That year we had a hard time reaching my ex, but he finally answered so my brother dropped the kids off with their dad. I made a nice dinner for friends and after dinner I called the kids to let them know I was coming to pick them up. When they came out to the car, I asked them how their day was. They said that dad was "sick" (hungover) and just sat there dozing off. He had nothing for them for dinner (he was a chef) and my heart nearly broke. I brought them home, gave them a nice dinner and a special treat for dessert. My children are now 27, 26, and 22. I am sure they were changed by their dad's indifference on this and many other occasions, but they have survived and done well for themselves. Keep on being the best mom you can and your children will be ok. One thing I think about is how my life and the life of my children has been better without their father's bad influence on a daily basis. Hang in there.
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