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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Mary-583970 said: Yeah, I think putting up photos of you having fun is always okay, even if it's not the kind of...
(Quote) Mary-583970 said:

Yeah, I think putting up photos of you having fun is always okay, even if it's not the kind of fun a guy might like :) I LOVE wine tasting and going to vineyards. I LOVE good craft beers! That doesn't mean I drink them a lot (maybe one a month??) and I LOVE a good G&T with my conversation. I go to the bar a lot with friends, but it's usually because I'm DD and just want to dance with them :)

Showing off skin is sometimes subjective....If I wear a nice dress, it might look like I'm showing off a lot of skin, because I HAVE more skin than thinner girls; if a thin girl were to wear the same style dress, it would probably look modest on her :( And having DDD sweater kittens doesn't help trying to appear modest! I can wear a turtleneck and it'll still look showy :/

--hide--


There are a lot of great vineyards in MD... PA, too, as well as micro-breweries! wink


theheart

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Dec 31st 2012 new

Yeah, surprisingly good vineyards around here on the mid-atlantic! I go to a lot of wine fests :) I must have about 20 bottles on the ready right now tonguethough the best vineyards I've been to were in the finger lakes area of NY :)

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Dec 31st 2012 new

A couple points on modesty:


1. Women who in dress is overly sexually manner normally do so because they have low self-esteem. They dress this way because they know men will noticed them more and approach them more, but this is normally the wrong type of men or for the wrong reasons. These women normally end up in a string of very shallow relationships and are normally to blinded by their low self-esteem to realize what they are doing.


2. Modesty is sexy.



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Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Mary-583970 said: Showing off skin is sometimes subjective....If I wear a nice dress, it might look like I'm sho...
(Quote) Mary-583970 said:

Showing off skin is sometimes subjective....If I wear a nice dress, it might look like I'm showing off a lot of skin, because I HAVE more skin than thinner girls; if a thin girl were to wear the same style dress, it would probably look modest on her :( And having DDD sweater kittens doesn't help trying to appear modest! I can wear a turtleneck and it'll still look showy :/

--hide--


I was going to make this point, but then i deleted, i'm glad you brought it up. Modesty is a very subjective thing, what is modest in some cultures is in-modest in others. I think you just have to look at the intent behind how one dresses(and it's normally pretty clear) to judge modesty.

FWIW, there are very few proflies i've seen on my end that cross the line, maybe 1 in 100 on CM.

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Dec 31st 2012 new

cool I know before I say word one that I may be sticking my foot in my mouth, but all I have to say to that is: munch munch yum.


I happen to like my dresses. I also enjoy to the enth degree a fabulous pair of heels. And having a great manicure should be written into law. Oh, and pedicures, don't even get m started. A must. That is what is right for ME, personally. And, if a guy does not like my little black dress, or the out fit I wear jogging, well, no problem. All that means is thatthe guy is not right for me and vice versa.


As for shopping, what I choose may not be modest for some, or may be tasteful for others. Frankly, I wear what I know I feel good in. I love to shop, I love dresses, and I think stockings are second only to heels. If God has an issue with how I dress, well, He will be the one who will let me know. Now, FOR ME, I have a line in my sand that there are some outfits I would not where out with "just the girls". If I were dating someone, I would probably wear the outfit out with that guy...See, we all have our lines in the sand. I think this business of responsibility for temptations is getting put a little too squarely on the women's shoulders, too. What about the guys for ogling every thing who walks by and not controlling his thoughts?


And the bar scene. Well, I have never been inlined to go to bars all that much. But, it is perfectly fine for someone to go have a drink with friends after work. I see nothing wrong with that, and wouldn't judge them for doing so. If some guy has a picture of himself with a drink, well, maybe that was one night he was out with friends in a very long time and just happened to be having a good time, like the pic ad posted it. It doesn't necessarily mean he goes out drinking like a fish every night. Pictures are first impressions. Key word being "first". If it is right, well then you might be lucky enough to get impressions 2-??? and form your opinion of the person that way. I like to keep an open mind and give a person a chance before I make a snap judgement based on 1-2 pics.


Your desire to have a woman who dresses a certain way, etc. is totally fine. But, just rememeber that what is right for you may not be right for the next guy or girl. And, as for how a woman dresses and takes a pic? Again, who knows...maybe some girl put on an outfit and felt great in it and just posted a picture. One picture does not a whole life describe. It is a snapshot in time. Nothing to make far reaching assumptions about.


And the Wii at home? I have one but unplugged it so my kids would stay off. There is nothing wrong with going out dancing and have a decent time. It all depends on how one conducts oneself - is the person having full body dirty dancing contact, or is it tasteful with little to no contact? You don't know if you are not there. We're not meant to live in a vacuum. That is why there is the commisioning at the end of Mass. We are supposed to go out into the world and make a positive difference. Being stuck at home playing the Xbox is not going out and making a difference. It is hiding.

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Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Tara-916865 said: So true, Marita. We know that girls who show more get more attention. It's a fact of life. It's m...
(Quote) Tara-916865 said: So true, Marita. We know that girls who show more get more attention. It's a fact of life. It's much more trouble to find styles that are modest, and even if they are "better," we still need to add to it (how many tanks and cami's do I have????). It's so much work! Lol that's why so many women are like forget it! It's more time-consuming and they get less attention out of it. But, even growing up in the "if you got it, flaunt it" generation, I still take the time and effort to be modest and cute, even if it doesn't attract most guys. I know that there are some out there who are truly trying to be pure, and I'm not going to tempt them to sin. But men, when you see a woman dressed modestly, please compliment her! :) We need all the encouragement we can get!
--hide--


Believe it or not, I do my best to compliment women who dresses modestly and I do find them more attractive. Surely, you're right that gals who show more get more attention. There are other ways to get a guy's attention. For example, a gal playing a game of basketball with her friends is attractive! It doesn't even have to be her playing sports to make me give her my undivided attention. Catching her eye when she's reading a book at a table while dressed up like a modest lady is beautiful too. In that scenario I usually just smile or say hello biggrin.

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Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Mary-583970 said: Yeah, I think putting up photos of you having fun is always okay, even if it's not the kind of...
(Quote) Mary-583970 said:

Yeah, I think putting up photos of you having fun is always okay, even if it's not the kind of fun a guy might like :) I LOVE wine tasting and going to vineyards. I LOVE good craft beers! That doesn't mean I drink them a lot (maybe one a month??) and I LOVE a good G&T with my conversation. I go to the bar a lot with friends, but it's usually because I'm DD and just want to dance with them :)

Showing off skin is sometimes subjective....If I wear a nice dress, it might look like I'm showing off a lot of skin, because I HAVE more skin than thinner girls; if a thin girl were to wear the same style dress, it would probably look modest on her :( And having DDD sweater kittens doesn't help trying to appear modest! I can wear a turtleneck and it'll still look showy :/

--hide--


The majority of profiles I've viewed are modest. The whole bar scene pictures are subjective to the person viewing them. I understand the part where you said you're the designated driver and you just wanted to dance with your friends. Since, I've been in that situation where I'm one of the sober ones the whole night because I promised to drive my friends home. There are gals who goes to bars & pubs that still dress modestly smile. I usually don't give my attention to woman who are showing too much skin because I know many guys are already giving her the attention she wants. The woman I find modest in my opinion are usually classy and sociable which is very attractive. I can usually tell if I find a woman's body physically attractive without showing much skin. Just by the way she moves and presents herself in her beautiful "modest" clothes. In my opinion, modesty shows a bit of mystery for both men & women.

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Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Brian-144650 said: Ok, this is for real, b/c I'm tired of seeing it and well I guess I'm complaining a littl...
(Quote) Brian-144650 said:

Ok, this is for real, b/c I'm tired of seeing it and well I guess I'm complaining a little but more just concerned. There are 2 commonalities that I see constantly on profiles of women on here that, frankly, might have better luck on match.com.

1) you have pictures in your profile with you at a bar drinking; or you have more than 1 picture on here with alcohol in it.

2) you have pictures in your profile showing off cleevege and/or short/tight fitting dresses/clothing that looks too 'pop' culture

Ok first, I am in no way a prude about drinking, I like alcohol on occassion and enjoy it at events, but certainly not daily or often for that mater. Is the first thing you ladies want to covey to a future partner, that 'hey i'm cool' I drink, yea I have fun! Thats probably a horrible way to start a pickup line...hey is your fav. drink a hot toddie b/c you certainly look tasty...I mean lets be real. If you are 'tired of meeting the same kind of guy at bars' then you come on here and post bar pictures, I'm confused, do you not like the bar scene or do you just not like the guys at the bar scene, which when I last checked was the only reason to go to a bar is to meet people of the opposite sex, you certainly don't go for the overpriced alcohol do you? If you do haha well I guess you are not really worth it either, lol, no offense...maybe

Secondly, you want to attract a good, wholesome guy, who doesn't oogle over every living and breathing thing that walks by him, Treats you with respect, and upholds your dignity, and yet you have pictures that show off 75% of your breasts/legs. Modest is hottest. When I say modest, I don't mean wear a full ninja suit like the muslim women, b/c thats rediculous but, wear something that covers up 100% of your chest and at least 50% of your legs. If we need to see more of either, it will come on our wedding night. I am all for dressing fashionably and its quite attractive actually when women dress very nice and coordinate and look put together. I have a friend who is married now but came to work every day very nicely put together, women, can you help me out here?

--hide--


Hey, they satisfy the desires of the 5/7's and we all know which two tenets of the faith I'm talkin' 'bout. Happy New Year!

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Dec 31st 2012 new

You nailed it!

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Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Livia-407406 said: So I just took a look through my pictures and realized I have three of me in a bar/pub, one holdi...
(Quote) Livia-407406 said:

So I just took a look through my pictures and realized I have three of me in a bar/pub, one holding a beer, one in a vineyard, two at a brewery, and two from New Year's Eve while out with a friend.


To which I can only say...God, please spare me the misfortune of ending up with a man who flies into a rage at the sight of a woman holding a drink or showing a tiny bit of skin. Life is too short.


I think Shakespeare said it best: "Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?"


Or perhaps Hilaire Belloc?


"Wherever the Catholic sun doth shine,
There’s always laughter and good red wine.
At least I’ve always found it so.
Benedicamus Domino!”


Oh, and you should NEVER assume that a Catholic girl at a bar is there to "meet guys." (By which I assume you mean one to go home with?) That is an apalling rash judgement to make about your sisters in Christ. I certainly would never make such a vulgar assumption about the Catholic men I know, many of whom enjoy an evening out at their local watering hole on a regular basis.

--hide--


What somebody from Green Bay hanging at a bar and holding a beer. I'm shocked, apalled and taken aback. laughing Oh, and I would send my sympathies about the Packers loss, except it was to my Vikings!!!! Yeah, baby!!! Skol Vikings!

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