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A place to learn, mingle, and share

Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people 45+. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is told in chapters 11-25 of the book of Genesis.
Learn More:Abraham & Sarah

Dec 30th 2012 new

wink Happy and a Peacefull New Year. Thank You All for the comments on this topic.

would a pre-cana course cover a number of questions on this topic?

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Zoe-337980 said: interesting.... pre cana for the elderly!
(Quote) Zoe-337980 said:

interesting.... pre cana for the elderly!

--hide--
Something like old dogs and new tricks???? scratchchin

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Zoe-337980 said: interesting.... pre cana for the elderly!
(Quote) Zoe-337980 said:

interesting.... pre cana for the elderly!

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Not that we want to exclude you from anything, Zoe, but you're too young to participate in something like that.... wink hug

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Jacqueline-556574 said: It makes sense to have some verbal discussions about money well before marriage, whether on...
(Quote) Jacqueline-556574 said:

It makes sense to have some verbal discussions about money well before marriage, whether one has children from a prior marriage or not. I support that, but not "pre-nups." Mention of needing a prenup is a good way to lose a fiance. No one, and I mean no one appreciates being considered a "threat."

An individual's credit report is much like a balance sheet. It shows one's credit worthiness at one point in time, e.g., it can be changed for the better or for the worse, and is not a good indicator of the person in general. No one is exempt from life difficulties such as critical illnesses, unexpected life problems, and loses of income. Any and all of the above would affect a credit report.

Better, I would find someone who I think has good judgment, or rather whose ideals are similar to my own about money and living in general.
--hide--
Discuss finances? Definitely, positively, emphatically agree with you Jacqueline. This is a critical matter, whether it's a person's first marriage or 2d. One of the main sources of disagreements in a marriage (and causes for divorce) relate to financial issues. Its pays (no pun intended) to discover what each other's spending habits are, and learn about each other's views on working, saving, standard of living, and so on.

It seems a good number of younger people have or have had credit difficulties. Some involve unfortunate, unavoidable circumstances; others are caused by overspending because of easy credit.

For the age-mature set, a credit report doesn't accurately reflect a person's financial condition. With cheap credit available, it's often beneficial to borrow $$$, and keep investments intact if they are earning more than the interest being paid out. A credit report doesn't reflect a person's means to pay anything that is owed. That's my objection to the overemphasis on credit reports.

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Ray-566531 said: If by premarital agreements you're referring to prenuptial agreements, you should be aware that...
(Quote) Ray-566531 said:

If by premarital agreements you're referring to prenuptial agreements, you should be aware that they are not allowed by the Church. The reasoning behind it is that it automatically presumes that a divorce situation is not out of the question, thus going against the Church's teaching about the permanency of marriage. There are certain arrangements that meet with the Church's approval concerning financial agreements, such as those involving children of a previous marriage, but the scope is limited.

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I don't see what is wrong with a pre-nuptial agreement, it's much like a vow. The problem is that we are not living in a Catholic nation. If one or the other wants a divorce then they just go to a lawyer. The state is making the laws, not the church, so we really need to follow state laws.

I would rather have the option of rejecting the state in the case of marriage. We were suppossed to be seperate but it's not the case anymore. The only option and only true vow would be for both couples to ask the Priest who married them for permission for a legal divorce. And whoever attended the wedding should have a say also.

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Peter-572496 said: Happy and a Peacefull New Year. Thank You All for the comments on this topic.would a pre-...
(Quote) Peter-572496 said:

Happy and a Peacefull New Year. Thank You All for the comments on this topic.

would a pre-cana course cover a number of questions on this topic?

--hide--

Sure.

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) John-711000 said: When two people marry or remarry later in life, there are more items to sort through than just wed...
(Quote) John-711000 said:

When two people marry or remarry later in life, there are more items to sort through than just wedding gifts. Marriage between two people with significant histories involves important decisions concerning finances, children,assets, housing, retirement and more. Here are five topics that you will want to discuss with your potential spouse right away to ensure that your best financial interests, both as individuals and as a couple, are protected in your new union.


Read more: www.investopedia.com

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Who has a potential spouse right now?

laughing laughing laughing

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Jacqueline-556574 said: It makes sense to have some verbal discussions about money well before marriage, whethe...
(Quote) Jacqueline-556574 said:

It makes sense to have some verbal discussions about money well before marriage, whether one has children from a prior marriage or not. I support that, but not "pre-nups." Mention of needing a prenup is a good way to lose a fiance. No one, and I mean no one appreciates being considered a "threat."

An individual's credit report is much like a balance sheet. It shows one's credit worthiness at one point in time, e.g., it can be changed for the better or for the worse, and is not a good indicator of the person in general. No one is exempt from life difficulties such as critical illnesses, unexpected life problems, and loses of income. Any and all of the above would affect a credit report.

Better, I would find someone who I think has good judgment, or rather whose ideals are similar to my own about money and living in general.
--hide--


Jacqueline, What do you mean by threat?

Dec 31st 2012 new

I don't believe that a pre-Cana course would cover finances. I believe that it would be more spiritually oriented.

I, too, believe that finances should be discussed thoroughly before a marriage takes place. If I were to marry a man, I would be willing to show him my will, a list of my assets, my 401k and annuity paperwork, my 10-40 forms that I have for the last several years, my property tax bills, my credit rating -- and information abt any loans that I might have. I would expect him to do the same for me. If I cannot trust my future husband with this vital information, then whom can I trust?

I would also agree with my future husband that my children would receive any assets that I have earned to date in my life. I would do likewise for him and his children. We would each sign a document to that effect. Any assets eaarned afetr the date of our marriage we would split equally. And then we could start our lives together knowing that we were doing so out of love, fairness and not greed.

Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) John-711000 said: I don't see what is wrong with a pre-nuptial agreement, it's much like a vow. The...
(Quote) John-711000 said:

I don't see what is wrong with a pre-nuptial agreement, it's much like a vow. The problem is that we are not living in a Catholic nation. If one or the other wants a divorce then they just go to a lawyer. The state is making the laws, not the church, so we really need to follow state laws.

I would rather have the option of rejecting the state in the case of marriage. We were suppossed to be seperate but it's not the case anymore. The only option and only true vow would be for both couples to ask the Priest who married them for permission for a legal divorce. And whoever attended the wedding should have a say also.

--hide--


A prenup agreement anticipates divorce, which is why the Church doesn't support them. If once married, we are "one," there is no "other person" that we need to keep in check.


My two cents.


- Elizabeth

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