(Quote) Celia-821539 said:
Alright, I'm just going to shove this thought on out there and see what ya'll have to say...
(Quote) Celia-821539 said:
Alright, I'm just going to shove this thought on out there and see what ya'll have to say. Every so often, I get a wild hair and think, hey,there are folks in other denominations who are truly good Christians, someone of whom even live where I am moving to in July...
Attractive, hard working, really salt of the earth guys. I have met a few.
But, every last time, when the topic turns to religion, I find that I feel almost like they are speaking a different language. I wasn't thinking as I was talking to this one guy who is Baptist - great person - and said something like, "I think all denominations have something to bring to the table. The Baptist, for sure, got the basic memo.".....
I meant that in the nicest of ways. It was not meant to be snarky - I was saying that Baptists often have great kids' programs, and they do get the basic message of Christ across. But, the truth is, I feel like Catholics seem to have gotten the "bulk of the file". There is so much information missing in other denominations - Mary, for one, the Saints, what about the rosary, what about Perpetual Adoration... and,there was no simple prayer and poof I was "saved" like Puff the Magic Dragon....
So, I think to myself, maybe this one or that one, since finding ONE good Catholic guy anywhere near me seems to not be happening...Would anyone date non-Catholics, or is it like I am finding over and over- you just speak a different language? The other thing is, how would I ever be able to respect someone who I don't think is entirely qualified to take on a role of spiritual leadership? So, then I am stuck with an almost non-existent pool of Catholic guys, and that isn't good either. Then narrow that down to looking for a 7/7, and the dating pool got even smaller. Yarfles. That is my word for when I am frustrated. YARFLES!!!!!
Well, Celia -- you'll get differing opinions on this -- that's the only certain thing about your question.
It's typically the preference of CM members to seek out one of their own Faith. It can save some heartache, and frustrations in the end. However, we might set out to find a good Catholic mate, but in the process come upon a person of another faith who has all the qualities we seek.
I don't think we can toss out a blanket statement that dating non-Catholics is not a good idea. It can and it has worked out well for many. What's important are values -- respect for life, permanency of marriage, respect for each other's faith. Our Faith is a gift -- one which not everyone receives. It's hard for a non-Catholic to shake off years of believing in another faith when born in it, and practiced it just as generations before that person had been doing.
A key element is having the proper respect for others' beliefs. No serious ridiculing, mocking or intolerance can be allowed if a relationship/marriage is to flourish. Being of different faiths can often results in problems raising children, and sharing in worship services, but these obstacles can be overcome.
We believe the Catholic Faith offers the full means of attaining salvation; we also trace our roots back to Jesus, who established His Church. Catholic doctrines haven't changed in 2000 years and won't in the future. In other words, we have the Truth. There are certain aspects of our Faith that can be subject to opinions, but the essentials are unwavering. This typically doesn't take place in other faith groups. We see gay people having a "marriage" ceremony in some churches; differences in the belief about Communion where it exists in other churches, and so on.
There is an opportunity to educate a non-Catholic person so that there is a basic understanding. The same should be done by the Catholic. A Catholic can't put pressure on another person to convert. The conversion, if there is one, has to come from within -- that person needs to receive the gift of Faith. Without that gift, is the person unworthy? Not at all. We shouldn't approach this with an air of superiority, looking down at others' faiths because they differ from ours. (No, I'm not including off-beat or satanic worshippers.)
As a personal example, my wife was a lifelong Lutheran, and remained so well into our marriage. About 12 years later, she decided to become a Catholic -- an exemplary one at that. This doesn't always happen, and one can't live in expectation that it will. Different faiths can present at least some minor problems, and the Catholic is obligated to remain true to his/her beliefs. But it's also another chance to grow in ecumenical spirit. If one enters a Lutheran church, for example, you'll see that physically, no one can tell the difference between them and Catholics.
For a person who is very strong in the Catholic Faith, problems and challenges can be minimized. Certain denominations have a dour attitude toward Catholics, and that can be a problem for them. Oftentimes though, they are surprised to find out that what they've been taught is NOT correct. Some are stubborn to admit it -- that type of person can be a problem.
Be cautious; be faithful; be open.