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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

12/31/2012 new

heart I really hate to not consider dating guys of other denominations because it does reduce the dating pool.


But, for some reason, even when I was little and enrolled in an Episcopal school, I thought how awesome it would be to be Catholic. And, I feel like having to explain to a guy who is another denomination about what it means to be Catholic, and give a fuller version of Christianity just is mabe putting me in a role I don't want or need to be in tryng to explain it to someone.


And, to be perfectly honest, I also always thought in the back of my head somewhere how awesome it would be to get married (someday) in the Catholic Church. Once I converted, I started thinking I have the chance at the wedding I always wanted someday, where I feel like it will have so much more meaning than just a great dress or whatever. (Although a beautiful dress IS nice.)


If I go off dating non-Catholics, and say I were to ever marry one, I would be giving up the dream in my heart to get married IN the Catholic Church TO a Catholic - not one I have to try to convert, but someone who knows the Faith at least as well as, or better than in some ways, I do. And, I want it to be that guy's heart's desire, too. I want us both to relish every bit of preparation for it, and for the day to be the most special day to both of us AND to God, too.


I gave up that dream once and it was a train wreck. So, I am not sure why on earth I am even condering giving it up again. Funny, I told the Baptist fella what a privilege I feel it is to be Catholic. He didn't get it. Why I was even considering dating non-Catholics - well, maybe I am impatient, and THAT is what I need to work on. wave Thank you guys for listening and understanding, by the way. theheart rosary

12/31/2012 new

(Quote) Celia-821539 said: I really hate to not consider dating guys of other denominations because it does reduce the datin...
(Quote) Celia-821539 said:

I really hate to not consider dating guys of other denominations because it does reduce the dating pool.


But, for some reason, even when I was little and enrolled in an Episcopal school, I thought how awesome it would be to be Catholic. And, I feel like having to explain to a guy who is another denomination about what it means to be Catholic, and give a fuller version of Christianity just is mabe putting me in a role I don't want or need to be in tryng to explain it to someone.


And, to be perfectly honest, I also always thought in the back of my head somewhere how awesome it would be to get married (someday) in the Catholic Church. Once I converted, I started thinking I have the chance at the wedding I always wanted someday, where I feel like it will have so much more meaning than just a great dress or whatever. (Although a beautiful dress IS nice.)


If I go off dating non-Catholics, and say I were to ever marry one, I would be giving up the dream in my heart to get married IN the Catholic Church TO a Catholic - not one I have to try to convert, but someone who knows the Faith at least as well as, or better than in some ways, I do. And, I want it to be that guy's heart's desire, too. I want us both to relish every bit of preparation for it, and for the day to be the most special day to both of us AND to God, too.


I gave up that dream once and it was a train wreck. So, I am not sure why on earth I am even condering giving it up again. Funny, I told the Baptist fella what a privilege I feel it is to be Catholic. He didn't get it. Why I was even considering dating non-Catholics - well, maybe I am impatient, and THAT is what I need to work on. Thank you guys for listening and understanding, by the way.

--hide--



Celia, sometimes I think the same thing because sometimes I think I have more in common with some of the non-Catholic Christians I meet (because they are taking God's Word seriously, are trying to live a moral life, are excited about their faith) than Catholics - but CM is of course different because most people are on this site because they DO take their Catholic Faith seriously.

I guess my first response is that I wouldn't rule out a non-Catholic Christian man, but I'm not sure I would actively pursue such a relationship either because there are many differences to overcome. Like you said, when you start discussing faith it's like you are speaking different languages. I've experienced this too.

I think that it can work if there is a great deal of respect for one another, very open communication about what you expect from one another in regard to practice of faith. I think if I was in such a relationship it would be important to attend one another's churches so as to understand where the other person is coming from. (Of course that assumes that you are really grounded in your Catholic Faith and theology.) This way any prejudices would come out - like derogatory cracks about Catholics, or finding that there are greater differences in belief than initally thought. Sometimes we can misinterpret lack of response as agreement - I discovered this in a relationship. I thought we shared the same beliefs about God only to find that we had very different conceptions of Baptism and living the New Covenant than I thought. It's just that he is a really nice guy who didn't want to disagree with me or my Catholic Faith, even though he had no desire to understand Catholic teaching.

12/31/2012 new

2 women from my parish (sisters) both wanted to marry a Catholic man. One ended up marrying a Muslim (but in the Church), and another married a non-Catholic that she met on a blind date. Both marriages are fine. Another woman married a Baptist man who participated in one of our young adult retreats. He converted to Catholicism last Memorial Day. So there are "mixed" marriages that work out, as long as both respect each other's faith. The Muslim actually attends various praise and worship sessions at the parish, and loves God a great deal.

So as much as I would love to marry a Catholic woman, I won't set limits on what God may have in mind for a potential spouse.

12/31/2012 new
12/31/2012 new
My sister, who became Baptist in 1993, actually cornered my mother, who is 76, and told her she was afraid that my mom was going to hell because she is Catholic. I was livid and I knew she wouldn't have dared say it if I were there...my one sister is Baptist and the other non-denominational but that's another story..my mom told me she didn't want me to confront her so I didn't but I want to
01/01/2013 new

(Quote) Michelle-920900 said: It is hard to have a mixed faith relationship...I for one was married to a Southern Baptist fo...
(Quote) Michelle-920900 said:

It is hard to have a mixed faith relationship...I for one was married to a Southern Baptist for 12 yrs. He put my faith down all the time even though we baptized our children Catholic. Our Catholic religion has been around longer than most of the other religions and we are mocked more than any other faith from what I have observed in the past. Just hang in there and you will find a good Catholic man who understands your values better than another denomination guy.

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Extremely well said clap

I think that thinking that you need to widen the dating pool may be somewhat misguided for most. While God may truly have that plan for a few it is not the case more often than not from what I have seen. That being said I do not want to presume to know what God has planned for you. For me however, there would be no way it would work and that is truly the only person I can speak for.

01/01/2013 new

I will never close the door on dating non-Catholics. I had the best example of this growing up. My mom is a cradle Catholic. My dad was a Methodist but rarely went to church. My mom made sure my dad was ok with raising any children Catholic before they got married. My parents were married for 28 years when my dad died. While my dad never converted, he did support our Catholic upbringing. He was always at our school fuctions when we attended the Catholic school. He occasionally came to church (always for things like 1st communion) My father even participated in saying the rosary with us. He occationally asked questions about the religion in front of us but most of the time asked his questions in private with just mom. He NEVER spoke down about our religion in front of us. My grandma (my dad's mom) even went to the Catholic church with me and my daughter when we would visit her. She wanted to support how I was raised and how I was raising my daughter.

So dating/marriage to a non-Catholic is definitely possible. This kind of relationship takes communication and understanding in order to make it work, but it is possible.

01/01/2013 new

(Quote) Angela-893980 said: While my dad never converted, he did support our Catholic upbringing. He was always at our schoo...
(Quote) Angela-893980 said:

While my dad never converted, he did support our Catholic upbringing. He was always at our school fuctions when we attended the Catholic school. He occasionally came to church (always for things like 1st communion) My father even participated in saying the rosary with us. He occationally asked questions about the religion in front of us but most of the time asked his questions in private with just mom. He NEVER spoke down about our religion in front of us. My grandma (my dad's mom) even went to the Catholic church with me and my daughter when we would visit her. She wanted to support how I was raised and how I was raising my daughter.

So dating/marriage to a non-Catholic is definitely possible. This kind of relationship takes communication and understanding in order to make it work, but it is possible.

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Key "NEVER spoke down about our religion"- when people aren't threatened and just let others walk their path it works out so well.

01/01/2013 new

For me, Catholicism is a key piece of what I love in life. I want to find that same love in a spouse. It would feel so sad to not have that commom passion.

01/01/2013 new

I have Protestant friends and have respect for those of other faiths. We all get along fine as we discuss our various issues but we are not married. I could not imagine having my Mass participation, adoration and veneration of the saints curtailed or eliminated.

I have family on both sides who married non-Catholics 30 - 40 years ago in non-Catholic churches. They long ago left their faith. They have shared with me that had they not gone to the other faith, their marriages would have difficult. To me, when someone just gives up their faith, I would have to question how strong their Catholic faith was in the first place.

If I remarry, I just don't want someone who calls themselves Catholic. I prefer a practicing everyday Catholic. I want both of us to help each other gain eternal salvation.

I firmly believe our church is truly one, holy, catholic and apostolic as founded by Jesus Christ. My belief in that one sentence will never change - ever.


Blessings, Praying Praying Praying

Leon

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