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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Dec 31st 2012 new
Thank God that woman goes to Church. Ever notice, that is where the Confessional is?
Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:... And because the structures that reninforced that sinful behavior was socially unacceptable are no l...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:... And because the structures that reninforced that sinful behavior was socially unacceptable are no longer present in our culture, they are able to live with the delusion that they are good because they are "nice."
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From a devout non-Catholic platonic ladyfriend in Cleveland in 1969 ... keep in mind cohabitation wasn't common then....

The difference between a good girl and a nice girl....

The good girl goes on a date, goes home, and then goes to bed.

The nice girl goes on a date, goes to bed, and then goes home.

Dec 31st 2012 new

One of the issues I have with drawing conclusions based on the limited information we have about each situation is simply that...the information is simply limited. There is no way to know what is going on inside of the head of another. The sin of adultery is so easy to see. But the sin of pride and idolatry are some of those we cannot readily see. God and the individual work these things out. Our job is to pray for ourselves and others.

Please don't take mine or any other's posts as taking shots at you, John. You have given us a wonderful opportunity to discuss something all of us deal with. It is just that you were bold enough to post the issue.

A young man once told me (in his away from the Church years) that he did not go to church because of all the hypocrites. Without even thinking, I responded that it is better to go to Church with them than to hell with them. I was surprised by my answer but have reminded myself of it on several occasions.

We all need each other to pray for us and lift us up in times of despair. Someone who acts as the woman you discribed is definitely in a time of despair and without much respect for herself. Those who lord over others their knowledge and/or superior opinions are in despair and full of pride. They need us to pray for them rather than spew venomous anger at them. These experiences give us an opportunity for growth and an opportunity to love the unlovable...much like Jesus' knock at the door, we are given the opportunity to open the door and live the Christian life or leave it shut and avoid the opportunity to share Christ's love. Thank you for reminding me of that.


- Elizabeth

Jan 1st 2013 new

(Quote) John-135561 said: So, what does it mean to be a virtuous woman in America soceity today?
(Quote) John-135561 said:

So, what does it mean to be a virtuous woman in America soceity today?

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the same thing it meant to be virtuous in jesus's time or at any point in history.


and why stop at women? how many men live virtuous lives? and why confine ourselves to sexual morality alone? how many "virtuously chaste" men and women are foul cesspools of pride, envy, and other more insidious sins? at least with sexual sins, it's obvious we're doing something wrong and easier to repent. many pharisees go decades feeling good about themselves and not know their pride and fault finding are actually hideous sins.

Jan 2nd 2013 new
a virtuous person: Ezeckiel 18.
Jan 6th 2013 new

(Quote) Pat-5351 said: John, a woman of virtue is one who lives God's commands. They are many, and few, depending on how...
(Quote) Pat-5351 said:

John, a woman of virtue is one who lives God's commands. They are many, and few, depending on how you look at it. Some women do better than others. Some's sin is more public than others.

There are many virtuous women, truly virtuous, in the world and on CM. Seek out their company if the company of this woman bothers you.

And I would suggest giving up worrying about what others think of who you keep company with.

Jesus ate with sinners and tax collectors. And he explained why he did it. He ministered to the sinners, and used his being with them to teach others about sin and charity. Maybe you could consider doing the same. It might be a powerful witness.

--hide--


I have been thinking about this conversation and, Pat, you brought up some excellent points however: could there be a double standard? If a woman hangs out with a man who is known for taking women home, is that perceived differently than a man who is companions with a woman who does the same thing? I think, by society, it is perceived differently. Your thoughts?

Jan 6th 2013 new

Rachel, someone needs to talk to your parish priest about the scandal these public ministers are causing to the faithful, if that is true (i.e. divorced with no annulment and remarried, yet serving as a lector, etc.) No one really knows the state of someone's sin (like, you saw a parishoner leave a bar on Saturday at 3 am with a woman, and then there he is at Sunday 8 am mass in the clothes, serving as a extraordinary minister of communion), you never can be really sure). For those kind of situations, it's best to not assume the worst, and leave their situation to God.

Jan 6th 2013 new

Also, a truly virtuous person, man or woman, is way more concerned about their own sins (few as they may be), than any sin of someone else, because the virtuous person will have also grown in humility, which is perhaps the greatest virtue of you ask me.

Jan 6th 2013 new

(Quote) John-135561 said: I...
(Quote) John-135561 said:

I hear of women not being able to find a good man, but sometimes a person needs to look in the mirror. I have met and have many female friends. I have asked them this question, but I thought I would posted it here has well. What does it mean to be a woman of virtue in today's society? Has I had stated in other posts, I started with a few people a singles group at my church a few years back. The experience, almost made me and a few others want to leave the Church, but Jesus warns us of just such behavior, especially in the Parable of the Weeds.

The hypocrisy was particular high in one older female who would go to the local night club on Saturday and show up on Sunday Mass after having a one night stands. She would do this basically almost every weekend. I heard this from other members, and I was out with her several times and was stopped or seen by people who knew me or her, who basically said, what was a man of my character doing being out with someone like her? This older woman saw it has her right, frankly I was disgusted after finding out. She saw herself has a virtuous woman, needless to say myself and many others did not. Many of the others were not Catholic, or even Christian, it was an Atheist friend who confronted and consoled me on the matter. I use this only has an example from my experience.

Yes, I know the old line of, "Judge not least you be judged", but get it theologically correct. God does not call us not to judge. He knows we are judgmental creatures, how else would we be able to tell right from wrong, good from evil? Alcoholics use the same line, when someone tells them they have a drinking problem? It’s in the second part, “that the measure we measure others by we will also be measured by ourselves. In short, do not be a hypocrite.


So, what does it mean to be a virtuous woman in America soceity today?

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I think John is asking some women here to stand up and give testament to what God asks of us as women. To be role models for other women or even ourselves. So, although, I appreciate David's point too. John is basically asking women to display some virtue here.

Some things that come to mind are:

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, self-control, humor, respect, understanding, humility, reverence for life, putting God first.


In other terms:

Grow in our faith as David mentions.

Keep the 10 commandments.

Love God and our neighbor.

Sex is an expression of love only when it is within the context of marriage.

Jan 6th 2013 new
(Quote) John-135561 said: I hear of women...
(Quote) John-135561 said:

I hear of women not being able to find a good man, but sometimes a person needs to look in the mirror. I have met and have many female friends. I have asked them this question, but I thought I would posted it here has well. What does it mean to be a woman of virtue in today's society? Has I had stated in other posts, I started with a few people a singles group at my church a few years back. The experience, almost made me and a few others want to leave the Church, but Jesus warns us of just such behavior, especially in the Parable of the Weeds.



The hypocrisy was particular high in one older female who would go to the local night club on Saturday and show up on Sunday Mass after having a one night stands. She would do this basically almost every weekend. I heard this from other members, and I was out with her several times and was stopped or seen by people who knew me or her, who basically said, what was a man of my character doing being out with someone like her? This older woman saw it has her right, frankly I was disgusted after finding out. She saw herself has a virtuous woman, needless to say myself and many others did not. Many of the others were not Catholic, or even Christian, it was an Atheist friend who confronted and consoled me on the matter. I use this only has an example from my experience.

Yes, I know the old line of, "Judge not least you be judged", but get it theologically correct. God does not call us not to judge. He knows we are judgmental creatures, how else would we be able to tell right from wrong, good from evil? Alcoholics use the same line, when someone tells them they have a drinking problem? It’s in the second part, “that the measure we measure others by we will also be measured by ourselves. In short, do not be a hypocrite.


So, what does it mean to be a virtuous woman in America soceity today?



--hide--


Do all the rumor mongers at church also watch to see if she gets up to recieve communion instead of preparing themselves to receive communion?

Do you know for a fact that this woman has one night stands? Have you witnessed it with your own eyes? Have you tried to talk to her about it in a caring, compassionate way instead of just being disgusted by it and calling her a hypocrite? Perhaps she has a problem or an addiction. Maybe if you talked TO her instead of ABOUT her, you can help her change- if what you're hearing is even the truth.
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