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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jan 6th 2013 new

When you go to a book store you find volumes of books on how to think positively. You NEVER find a book on how to think negatively. Negativeness is part of our DNA. I happen to believe it is part of Original Sin, but that is a subject covered later.

If you spend ALL your time praying and NONE of your time acting, you are using God as a cop out. I can fully understand praying for guidance in big decisions, but a first date? If I was meeting someone or going out on a first date, I'd pray that this would be God's blessing and if not revealed quickly. I don't believe God wants us to spend 10 weeks praying over a first date.

I can underdstand praying over continuing a relationship, marriage, large business decisions, but would your pray over buying a loaf a bread? I supose you could, but God gave us intelligence too and we should use it in making decisions.

I felt she was using taking care of their family as an excuse to hide from life. I know, because I've done it.

It is my choice not to chose someone for a relationship 2,000 miles away. Not because we wouldn't be a match, but how many times have you heard someone going through a divorce that the person changed after marriage? Now if living in the same town someone could hide their true nature, how much easier is it miles away? I have chosen to use the intelligecne God gave me to make decisions. I pray that I use it wisely.

I am reminded of a homily that a priest had and actually heard it told as a joke previously:

A man lived in a flood zone and heard that there was a hurricane coming, but stayed in his house praying believed that God would save him.

When the water was lapping at his house's foundation the National Guard came by in a large truck and tried to remove him, but he said he was praying and God would save him.

When the house began to flood he crawled up on the roof and a boat came by trying to rescue him, but he said he was praying and that God would save him.

Finally the water floated the house away with him on top. A helicopter came by and tried to rescue him again, but he said he was praying and God would save him.

Eventually, the man died and went to heaven. When presented before God's throne the man complained to God, I prayed that you would save me but you didn't. God replied, "I gave you 4 chances and sent you three angels to rescue you, but you refused to act."

Jan 6th 2013 new

My post was in response to the original thread. Certainly if somone you have requires your continual attention and devotion, you cannot persue normal relationships, but that was not said in the original thread. I felt they may have been using their family relationship as an excuse to not date. In that case we are hiding our light under a basket. This certainly may not have been the case.

Jan 6th 2013 new

I think we find God's will in the choosing, not in the choice.

A prayerful decision, attempting to follow God's will, does follow God's will, no matter what the choice is.

I have found it helpful to offer up all my decisions and actions to God, to make them holy and do with them as He might.

(I keep wanting to say more... each paragraph there was, at one point, three times as long and filled with examples, adminitions, "insights", and so on. And editing them brings each down to the size of an aphorism. Maybe that's good; maybe it means I'm beingsimplistic.)

Jan 6th 2013 new
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: In my short time on CM, I have read a number of fora posts including a reference to "God's will.&quo...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

In my short time on CM, I have read a number of fora posts including a reference to "God's will." That you must be open to "God's will" in a match so you need to consider persons who perhaps do not have all the qualities you desire. Yet at the same time there have been posts stating that it's really up to you in regard to your qualifications regarding age, appearance, life experience. This seems to be doublespeak to me.

I have a much broader perspective now on God's will and discernment than I used to. I really think God's will is much more dynamic that it is often made out to be - and must be if we believe in human freedom. The fact is, all of us thwart God's will every day - it's called sin. So if we thwart God's will in little ways each day, what makes us think we're going to get it right in big decisions? I think God's will is that we learn how to LOVE during our time here on earth, and because we often screw up this plan for a good portion of our lives, He continues to place new ways to teach us to love in our path and hopefully we will embrace some of these and learn a little more about love during this journey called life.

I don't assume that we'll get it figured out here in this CM thread, since confusion over this was one of the reasons the whole Protestant Reformation happened, but maybe we can all get a fuller understanding for ourselves.

So what's your perspective on God's will?

--hide--


Let's take for example the a father in his middle age decided to have a child from his second wife who's 20 years younger. And.their offspring was born autistic. Is this scenario what we call the will of God? For allowing the couples to get married and have a child?

Scentific studiess from Stanford Univ. reveal that the chances of having an autistic child results from the passing of weaker genes from the father to the child during pro creation.

Sin is an addiction, but do we consider having kids at a later stage in our lives sinful? Perhaps only God knows what the outcome of our actions are, since He is outside of time. But when he was inside of time in the Holy Land He forgave sin.
Jan 6th 2013 new

(Quote) Arturo-535613 said: Let's take for example the a father in his middle age decided to have a child from his seco...
(Quote) Arturo-535613 said:

Let's take for example the a father in his middle age decided to have a child from his second wife who's 20 years younger. And.their offspring was born autistic. Is this scenario what we call the will of God? For allowing the couples to get married and have a child?

Scentific studiess from Stanford Univ. reveal that the chances of having an autistic child results from the passing of weaker genes from the father to the child during pro creation.

Sin is an addiction, but do we consider having kids at a later stage in our lives sinful? Perhaps only God knows what the outcome of our actions are, since He is outside of time. But when he was inside of time in the Holy Land He forgave sin.
--hide--


I would apply the same logic to this situation. No, having an autistic child is not a sin. It is simply the outcome of human choices. An austistic child may not be "normal" according to a limited view of the human person, but they are created in the image of God, a child of God and therefore a gift to be cherished. So while it was not God's ordained will that this child have autism, (but is allowed in His permissive will) it is certainly a moral good that the child is born. Where the will of God in these parents' lives will occur now is in the daily acceptance of the gift of this child, deepening in their ability to LOVE in the present moment.

Jan 18th 2013 new

bump smile

Jan 18th 2013 new

(Quote) Chris-930705 said: I think we find God's will in the choosing, not in the choice. A prayerful decision, a...
(Quote) Chris-930705 said:

I think we find God's will in the choosing, not in the choice.

A prayerful decision, attempting to follow God's will, does follow God's will, no matter what the choice is.

I have found it helpful to offer up all my decisions and actions to God, to make them holy and do with them as He might.

(I keep wanting to say more... each paragraph there was, at one point, three times as long and filled with examples, adminitions, "insights", and so on. And editing them brings each down to the size of an aphorism. Maybe that's good; maybe it means I'm beingsimplistic.)

--hide--


Chris, your post reminded me of this prayer:


Thomas Merton's Prayer:

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going.

I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it
will end.

Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am
following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you and I hope that I
have that desire in all that I am doing.

And I know that if I do this, you will lead me by the right road although I may know nothing about it.

Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in
the shadow of death, I will not fear, for you are ever with me and you will
never leave me to face my perils alone.

Jan 20th 2013 new
(Quote) Andrea-368827 said: This is a Jewish video. Since it is the same God we are all working to be on...
(Quote) Andrea-368827 said:





This is a Jewish video. Since it is the same God we are all working to be one with, i think it provides an interesting view of dating. Learning how to love, not doing our will. (Although, God's will for me is caring for my Mom, I don't do much dating).



youtu.be
(It seems to be not working at this moment - midnight, but I watched it a few minutes ago and enjoyed it).

--hide--


I LOVED this video- good stuff!! Thanks :)
Jan 20th 2013 new
This thread was wonderful and really hit what I have often struggled with- knowing God's will for my life. I'm a simple person and so I have to keep it simple-- for me I think of the scripture, "Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you." Padre Pio said, "Pray, hope and don't worry". I think sometimes we make (I MAKE!!) God's will too complicated. If we are living a life of prayer -- living in the light of God's truth-- living a life surrendered to Him-- then what do we have to worry about? He will guide us. This is what I tell myself anyway. It's hard to know God's will!! After making a very huge decision with my life and then feeling the questions come...a good friend's mother said to me, "You prayed and then you did what you thought best. Even if it wasn't the exact will of God- he remains with you. If Our Lord intended for us to turn right and we get it mixed up and turn left-- he turns with us." This simple concept has helped me a lot. He is with us- we should live our lives united to him each day and then trust that he will take care of the rest.
Jan 20th 2013 new
Andrea, thanks so much for posting the link to the video, Love and Fear...OUTSTANDING!! Many lessons to be pondered, just fabulous!!
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