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A place to learn, mingle, and share

Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

I came across an article today about how men might prefer to pray as a couple: dariasockey.blogspot.com


And another article on praying as a couple: www.ncregister.com


I recognize that each person prays their own way and the same with each couple, but the first article made me consider how there might be some significant differences in how men and women prefer to pray together. Thoughts?

I'm curious what your own preferences are and your thoughts on the article.

Thanks!

01/15/2013 new

I prefer to do as much as is possible including my special someone, as part of a team effort. Prayer is no exception. It is almost impossible to have it any other way when considering Mass, adorations, rosaries, prayers before meals and so forth. My family prayed together daily and I have adopted that as my lifelong Spiritual methodology.

Welcome to the CM fora, Sarah-901988!

01/15/2013 new

Hi Sarah, First of all, let me welcome you to CM and the forums. wave

Now as to your question....I firmly believe in praying with my partner. You can't have a solid foundation/relationship without praying together. I also believe the man should, and will be the Spiritual leader of our household. rose

I await the day Our Lord blesses me with such a loving gift in my life. (if he chooses to do so) Praying

01/15/2013 new

(Quote) Sarah-901988 said: I came across an article today about how men might prefer to pray as a couple: http://dariasockey...
(Quote) Sarah-901988 said:

I came across an article today about how men might prefer to pray as a couple: dariasockey.blogspot.com


And another article on praying as a couple: www.ncregister.com


I recognize that each person prays their own way and the same with each couple, but the first article made me consider how there might be some significant differences in how men and women prefer to pray together. Thoughts?

I'm curious what your own preferences are and your thoughts on the article.

Thanks!

--hide--

Welcome Sarah. I am so glas that you are sharing and joining us.

I do think that it is critical to have a prayer life and a shared journey with the sacraments with anyone you are discerning marriage with. It brings an honesty in the relationship that can lead each party to a better discernment and it also helps to draw you both closer to God. What more can we ask for in any relationship in life but especially in a discernment process.

01/15/2013 new

Thanks for the welcome y'all biggrin

I think I'm most curious to discover what specific types of prayer men and women prefer when praying together. Is there a difference in preference between men and women? The article seemed to imply (and several comments I saw agreed) that men are less inclined to enjoy spontaneous vocal prayer than women. Here is a bit from the article that particularly made me curious about this:

"We women, who buy and read nearly all of the popular Catholic Marriage books sold
in this country, frequently read about the importance of Husbands and Wives
Praying Together. And we're told that family rosary with all the kids kneeling
or slumping around the living room does not count. We're talking about a
special, quiet, set-aside time with you, your spouse, and God, where the two of
you join hands and offer your spontaneous and heart-felt praise, thanks, and
petitions. Out loud. Together. Well, together but taking turns.


Are there more than 100 Catholic male, non-Steubenville graduates * in this country
who enthusiastically go along with such a program? (not just tolerate it
out of love for their wives, but really enjoy it?) I'd be surprised.


This type of intimate, spousal prayer might sound beautiful to women. But to most
guys--good, devout guys--not so much. It requires seat-of-the-pants verbal
skills that many of them do not have. Not to mention a willingness to, at times,
express emotions that are hard for a guy to discuss with his wife in an
ordinary conversation, let alone talk to God about with his wife listening in.
It's one more example of a woman finding it therapeutic to talk about her
problems, and the man finding the same activity to be close to torture."

01/15/2013 new
As Linda said, I too look forward to the day I will be able to hold hands in prayer and Thanksgiving with my spouse.
01/15/2013 new

"This type of intimate, spousal prayer might sound beautiful to women. But to most guys--good, devout guys--not so much. It requires seat-of-the-pants verbal skills that many of them do not have."


Yeah... I don't have that skill either. I was in a women's group that either began or ended with improvised oral prayer. I always declined to take a turn, and thankfully they eventually gave up on trying to persuade me to pray that way. On the other hand, I was much more comfortable praying the rosary out loud together with a boyfriend. I especially like the tradition of reciting different parts of the prayer. (Yay, teamwork!)


Anyway, just saying that it's not only men who may feel uncomfortable being asked to do that kind of shared/public prayer.

01/16/2013 new

If given a choice, I would rather pray with a partner than without.

01/20/2013 new
I've heard "The family that prays together stays together, but I've never thought about how to do it.
01/20/2013 new

(Quote) Laura-896845 said: Anyway, just saying that it's not only men who may feel uncomfortable being asked to do that ...
(Quote) Laura-896845 said:

Anyway, just saying that it's not only men who may feel uncomfortable being asked to do that kind of shared/public prayer.

--hide--


I agree with Laura, it can be difficult for women too to feel comfortable praying spontaneously. I much prefer to recite traditional prayers like the rosary or the Divine office where different parts can be read together.

Perhaps in doing something like that, each partner would become more comfortable and apt to be more spontaneous.

I don't know - I've never been lucky enough to have a boyfriend who prayed in the first place! LOL

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