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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jan 20th 2013 new
(Quote) Marita-847688 said: The thing is I really WANT to get married and have kids, but I'm scared that if I pray about it God will l...
(Quote) Marita-847688 said:

The thing is I really WANT to get married and have kids, but I'm scared that if I pray about it God will lead me towards religious life. Religious life is a wonderful vocation, but I am hoping for marriage because that vocation is also beautiful. I would get God and a husband and a family. I know God puts desires in our hearts and if God was calling me to the religious life and I prayed about it I'd be happy to let Him lead the way. I'd love religious life, and realize I'd be happier there than I would be in marriage. However, I'm hoping that if I do pray for my vocation that it is marriage. I pray for my future husband, but I've never prayed for God's will on my calling. Does this make sense? Is this normal?

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Is the above a typo? If you think you would be happier in religious life than in marriage, why wouldn't you choose religious life?

I think we should never be afraid of asking for God's will in our life. God's will is always the best. I think God wants a person to enter into religious life out of Love, not because they are forced into it. The same goes with marriage.
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Jan 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Valentin-119637 said: Is the above a typo? If you think you would be happier in religious life than in marriage, wh...
(Quote) Valentin-119637 said:

Is the above a typo? If you think you would be happier in religious life than in marriage, why wouldn't you choose religious life?

I think we should never be afraid of asking for God's will in our life. God's will is always the best. I think God wants a person to enter into religious life out of Love, not because they are forced into it. The same goes with marriage.
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I'm saying that God puts desires in our hearts and that if I were to pray about it and marriage was for me, I'd be happier in marriage. However, if I were to pray about it, and the Religious Life was for me, I'd be happier in Religious life. That is because God puts those desires in us. However I do know that it's not all about what will make you happy but what will make God happy. I also know that in relationships you won't always be happy and you should be trying to make the other person happy and put God first and then yours spouse and then your kids and then yourself. I wasn't saying that I already know that Religious Life is best for me. I do understand what you are saying though, and if I think I'll be happiest in Religious Life after prayer and discernment, then I'll choose Religious Life. I also agree that it should be done out of love and not because we are forced into it.


That being said, what is the difference between desiring to be a Holy person and raising a Holy family in a Holy marriage and wanting to devote yourself to the religious life. In both instances, your heart can be on fire for God. I have to say that I don't know if I'd like the single life though it is nice to have my freedom.

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Jan 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Marita-847688 said: I'm saying that God puts desires in our hearts and that if I were to pray about...
(Quote) Marita-847688 said:


I'm saying that God puts desires in our hearts and that if I were to pray about it and marriage was for me, I'd be happier in marriage. However, if I were to pray about it, and the Religious Life was for me, I'd be happier in Religious life. That is because God puts those desires in us. However I do know that it's not all about what will make you happy but what will make God happy. I also know that in relationships you won't always be happy and you should be trying to make the other person happy and put God first and then yours spouse and then your kids and then yourself. I wasn't saying that I already know that Religious Life is best for me. I do understand what you are saying though, and if I think I'll be happiest in Religious Life after prayer and discernment, then I'll choose Religious Life. I also agree that it should be done out of love and not because we are forced into it.


That being said, what is the difference between desiring to be a Holy person and raising a Holy family in a Holy marriage and wanting to devote yourself to the religious life. In both instances, your heart can be on fire for God. I have to say that I don't know if I'd like the single life though it is nice to have my freedom.

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I'm not saying that I don't care either way. I really want to be married, but I've never prayed for God's will and I'm scared of the answer. Worst case senerio is if he gives me someone who I don't love, don't like, don't get along with, and am not even attracted to. I know God doesn't work this way, but it is a real fear of mine.

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Jan 20th 2013 new
(Quote) Marita-847688 said: I'm saying that God puts desires in our hearts and that if I were to pray about it and...
(Quote) Marita-847688 said:




I'm saying that God puts desires in our hearts and that if I were to pray about it and marriage was for me, I'd be happier in marriage. However, if I were to pray about it, and the Religious Life was for me, I'd be happier in Religious life. That is because God puts those desires in us. However I do know that it's not all about what will make you happy but what will make God happy. I also know that in relationships you won't always be happy and you should be trying to make the other person happy and put God first and then yours spouse and then your kids and then yourself. I wasn't saying that I already know that Religious Life is best for me. I do understand what you are saying though, and if I think I'll be happiest in Religious Life after prayer and discernment, then I'll choose Religious Life. I also agree that it should be done out of love and not because we are forced into it.




That being said, what is the difference between desiring to be a Holy person and raising a Holy family in a Holy marriage and wanting to devote yourself to the religious life. In both instances, your heart can be on fire for God. I have to say that I don't know if I'd like the single life though it is nice to have my freedom.

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I agree that both religious life and marriage are good, holy, vocations. Since they are both good vocations, I think God calls us to the one that we think will bring us greater happiness. I think the happier we are, the more happiness we can bring to others.
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Jan 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Valentin-119637 said: I agree that both religious life and marriage are good, holy, vocations. Since they are both ...
(Quote) Valentin-119637 said:

I agree that both religious life and marriage are good, holy, vocations. Since they are both good vocations, I think God calls us to the one that we think will bring us greater happiness. I think the happier we are, the more happiness we can bring to others.
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I like your response.

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Jan 20th 2013 new

What if after much discernment I find out that God is calling me to a certain vocation, but that I don't want that vocation? Again,though I have to remind myself that I will be happy where God puts me.

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Jan 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Marita-847688 said: What if after much discernment I find out that God is calling me to a certain vocation, but that...
(Quote) Marita-847688 said:

What if after much discernment I find out that God is calling me to a certain vocation, but that I don't want that vocation? Again,though I have to remind myself that I will be happy where God puts me.

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So why would God call you to a vocation that you don't want? Is God so cruel to force people to do something they hate for the rest of their lives? This is not the vision of what I think God reveals to us in Divine Revelation. Isn't this what Valentin was saying? That God wants us to respond in LOVE to our vocation? God doesn't want you to be a sister if you dislike the idea so much. You would have some desire for this vocation if you were called to it.

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Jan 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Jessica-897416 said: When and how did you come to realize that you were called to the Sacrament of Matrimony?
(Quote) Jessica-897416 said:

When and how did you come to realize that you were called to the Sacrament of Matrimony?

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Well since I am in the process of discernment I have to leave myself open to all possibilities. I think that it important to take things one day at a time and simply follow where God leads in the moment. That approach will always lead you to his arms which is the ultimate vocation. It also reduces frustration and disappointment. Sometimes He can put things or people in your life that may cause you feel that he is calling you in one direction or another but even that requires a complete surrender to divine providence as we never know if these things may be taken away for our greater good. My philosophy is to be open to everything and anything that God calls you to be and follow him in all things. That is the vocation of eveyone.

To answer the question. I don't know for sure that my vocation is marriage. I feel strongly called to it but I am open to what God wills because I know that therein alone lies my happiness.

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Jan 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: So why would God call you to a vocation that you don't want? Is God so cruel to...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:




So why would God call you to a vocation that you don't want? Is God so cruel to force people to do something they hate for the rest of their lives? This is not the vision of what I think God reveals to us in Divine Revelation. Isn't this what Valentin was saying? That God wants us to respond in LOVE to our vocation? God doesn't want you to be a sister if you dislike the idea so much. You would have some desire for this vocation if you were called to it.

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I don't dislike the idea of me being in Religious Life, but I love the idea of marriage for me. I've prayed for my future spouse, but I've never really asked God what He wants for me. Does that make sense?

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Jan 20th 2013 new
(Quote) Jessica-897416 said: When and how did you come to realize that you were called to the Sacrament of Matrimony?
(Quote) Jessica-897416 said:

When and how did you come to realize that you were called to the Sacrament of Matrimony?

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After 2 years of dating the same person
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