The recent article about cougars got me thinking more about this topic. Some people, mostly women, bemoan that being a "cougar" in unacceptable while being an anti-cougar (young woman dating a much older man) is acceptable. As for me, I, for the most part, don't really don't care what man dates what woman (to each their own), but the topic does fascinate me nevertheless.
The main reason that there is this double standard I believe does have to do with fertility. That does seem to be a "taboo" subject in catholic circles but, let's me honest, it is the elephant in the room noone wants to bring up.
I have a 46 male friend who recently started dating a woman who I believe is about his age. They seem to be happy and he is cool with the fact that she is divorced and has two kids. I have met the woman and I like her and think she is nice. But there is a part of me that can't help but think is my friend making a mistake. He commented well, at my age, I am not going to have kids of my own so it isn't an issue to me. Now, if he doesn't care about having his own kids, fine. If that is the case, I hope more than ever this relationship works out. Yet, if there is a part of him who still wants kids, why not date a woman in her 30's where this is still time? This woman he is dating could date an older man or fellow divorce` with kids of his own and form a brady bunch.
I know what I am writing may seem offensive to 40 something women or older and I apologize if that is the case. I certainly am NOT saying that age should be the only consideration by any means. If the Bible says to be fruitful and multiply, should mid 30 something and 40 something men date younger women?
I find it creey when an older guy 15 years plus broweses me and even creepier when they send me a message. I already have a great father I'm not looking for another one. That said everyone has their preferences and should date whomever they feel comfortable with regardless of age. My preference is close to my own age but I've know many others who prefered older or younger and it seemed to work for them. As to the child bearing issue that again is a personal preference though why a guy 46 plus want to have children at his age is a mystery to me their a lot of work and it's better to do that when you're younger. Also why not adopt?