I am giving a general reply. I am not concerned. I've been at this a long time and have served in many positions in the Church. I can remember being a young mother and in a deeply conservative phase (we all go through them phases that is, its part of our growth). And, my uncle, a dear and wonderful priest said to me, "Runt, relax. There are ebbs and there are flows. The pendulum always swings way to the right and then way to the left. Yes, we lost some things in Vatican II, things that your generation missed out on, but ours had plenty of. We are a living Church and we are full of the full gamut of humanity, good, bad, lost, lonely, longing and looking. At any given point someone will be unhappy about what is happening in the church. So what you must do is this, worry only about how you approach the Lord, are you so worried about what someone else isn't doing that you are paying more attention to them than to God? If so, quit. Be an example in your actions. And, second, discern what is essential and what is nonessential. Worry about the essentials, let the nonessentials settle themselves.
I would add to his wisdom, learn the history and learn cultures. Every culture and even subcultures will have things they do that are different. For example, it was a long tradition in Europe to have no kneelers at all, standing was the norm and it was a sign of reverence. The moving of the tabernacle to a side altar was not intended to neglect the Eucharist but to make the mass and the consecration the central focus. Many churches removed the tabernacle from the alter entirely setting it up in its own Eucharistic chapel. Part of the movements associated with Vatican II were designed to draw more people into the celebration of the Mass, not just showing up to hear the Mass. I think this is a good move. I also know that it can be taken too far and so we need good well trained catechists who engage with their students and are able to explain appropriately the hows and the whys and the proper gestures and most importantly the historic traditions etc.
Prior to Vatican II the emphasis was on the divinity of Christ, after Vatican II there was a concerted effort to focus on the humanity of Christ in a hope that the faithful would be able to develop a closer relationship with him. A move away from the checklists of dos and dont's to an embracing and experiencing of Our Lord. There are benefits to both and as one matures in the faith it becomes much easier to integrate the two into a rich and layered experience of Christ, that is both reverent and intimate.
One year as DRE, the First Holy Communion class was prepared and receiving their First Holy Communion. I am up there with them to help guide them through the moment and had warned them to take only a sip of the Blood. One little boy, takes a huge gulp, and I knew immediately we were about to have a serious problem. I am trying not to panic. I am trying to coax him gently and discretely into swallowing, but of course he's seven and after a few horrendous minutes, it happens, he opens his mouth and the Blood spews from him, I am trying desperately to catch as much as I can, but it splatters to the floor of the pew and out into the aisle. We are in a small church with not much room to maneuver and we are now in full swing of the Communion procession. I am trying to direct people around it, get someone to help and get to the back to get some purificators from the sacristy. I am totally shook up. I finally make it to the sacristy and then back and use the purificators to collect the Blood. After mass, I let Fr. know, I am almost ready to cry and the poor little guy realizing tha what he did has really shook everyone up is really sheepish. Fr. was great, he took the purificators and the little boys white shirt and rinsed them in the sacrarium and explained to the little one what he was doing and why. It was completely horrific and yet was turned into a blessed teaching moment and imparted the importance of the Eucharist and reverence in a manner we could never have accomplished otherwise. It also taught me to expect the unexpected and roll with the situation.
So I do not worry any longer. I do my best, I offer instruction when it is appropriate for me to do so and I have hope in the promise that the Gates of Hell will not prevail. Just my thoughts, Lauren