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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Annulments

Feb 24th 2013 new

On average, how long do most wait to file for an annulment after the civil divorce is final? Has anyone filed for the annulment before the civil divorce was final? I was married in the Church 30+ years ago and I just returned to the Church last September after being gone for a very long time. I ask this only because of the forums. I have had many tell me I should begin the process. However, after this long, I don't remember the details except for my last night in the house and I am not sure I want to dig us the dust. Thoughts?

Feb 24th 2013 new

Laurel, the civil divorce must be final before you can get the paperwork to start the annulment process. I waited a month before going to my parish and getting my paperwork. Having to relive the details of the marriage were very difficult but they helped with the healing process.

Feb 24th 2013 new

Thank you, my friend, for answering that. I am still learning....



Feb 24th 2013 new

I met with someone before the divorce was finalized. She went over it with me and gave me the paperwork to start on. This was 18 mos before my divorce was actually finalized (my ex came finding ways to throw wrenches in it). I was told I could get started on the paperwork and have everything ready for when the divorce was finalized and then turn everything in at that point. Here I am, almost 2 years later, and still haven't done it.... Not like I don't have anything else going on at this point either though... ;)

Feb 24th 2013 new

I just met with my deacon to initiate the process. I have heard it can be very healing. He said it can take easily 6 months, elsewhere I have seen up to 16 months. The Deacon said not only does my dioscese tribunal have to review it, but then it gets a second review by another tribunal. My paperwork asks basic demographics, witnessess and then 36 questions from family of origin info, dating, etc. The Deacon told me the more detailed the better. He has to review my application and write a letter of support. I want closure, I think this will help.

Feb 25th 2013 new

I was told you had to wait 1 year after the divorce was final. I started about 4 months prior to that year mark, everything was submitted about a month before...they went ahead & started processing it. I had my 1st decision by shortly after the 1year anniversary...still waiting for the 2nd :) any day now...tic toc, tic toc

Feb 25th 2013 new

I never even realized that one can start the annulment even before the divorce.

I have a question however if anyone knows the answer too....


When the Tribunal notifies a family member ( of my ex spouse) of the fact that I have filed, what does it say on the "respondents" end, does it give the "reason" for the annulment?


Mine is "grave discretion lacking at time of marriage"...


Sorry if these questions seem obvious.



Thanks! crossfingers

Feb 25th 2013 new

I waited 22+ years.. Witnesses was tough, but it got done..

Feb 25th 2013 new

The only person who is notified of the filing is the ex. They are given a chance to participate.. Witnesses are sent paperwork at the appropriate time farther along in the process.

One can't 'start' the annulment until the divorce is final. Most of the paperwork is available for printing online these days, so a person could do that at any time. You can't turn it in without the divorce decree.

My experience is that the Tribunal chooses the appropriate grounds. I didn't pick mine, but it was 'lack of discretionary discretion'.

Feb 25th 2013 new

(Quote) Laura-824866 said: I was told you had to wait 1 year after the divorce was final. I started about 4 months prior to ...
(Quote) Laura-824866 said:

I was told you had to wait 1 year after the divorce was final. I started about 4 months prior to that year mark, everything was submitted about a month before...they went ahead & started processing it. I had my 1st decision by shortly after the 1year anniversary...still waiting for the 2nd :) any day now...tic toc, tic toc

--hide--


The person that told you you have to wait a year was probably hoping that you would reconcile.. I know many people here that started their annulment immediately after the divorce was final..

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