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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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I'm rather sanguine myself - fun and spontaneous, silly even. I also have a touch of choleric. It's an occupational hazard. Despite my outwardly forward traits, my father told me that I should seek a woman that is gentle and soft. He felt that I would respond well to her expressions of emotions her softness with fuel my romantic inclinations. He once told me that I should seek a girl that blushes.

Largely ignoring his advice, I've dated a number of girls that are the opposite: fun and fiery. It hasn't worked particularily well. I don'tr respond well to continuous challenges or anger from the people I am with, and have often felt disrespected. The problem is, I can't seem to find someone gentle even when I try! I do believe it is important to be attracted to a person physically, at least initially, and almost every profile I look at is someone who is a Choleric-Sanguine mix!

I think that in the struggle for their faith, most Catholic women have been forced to build a fortress around them. They are strong, which is good, but they are often also aggressive. Maybe that's fine for beating away unwanted attention, but I often find it emasculating and disrespecful. I'm sure all the Cholerics will tell me I'm the problem, or that they're not telling me I'm the problem but pointing out that I sould recognise in myself that I'm the problem ;) I'm romantic and kind, but I can't find a woman with gentleness and holiness whom I'm attracted to.

I'm sure I may receive some heat for posting this, but other opinions are appreciated!

Mar 7th 2013 new

I think all this labeling is alot of hogwash myself, so I say find a girl you like, regardless of her "label," and see what happens.

Mar 7th 2013 new

Yes, I take the labelling with care....it helps in the sense that I wouldn't be surprised at the other person's activity. but not all sanguines are the same, eh?

A blushing lady may be of the slower sort. That is weird if you are used to women at a different speed. With a shy gal, one might make a firm introduction, but be immediately rebuked only to find out in weeks or months the grand gesture was quite impressive and there is more responsiveness. Sometimes a seed of love needs to be sown.

Mar 7th 2013 new

If someone indictes in their personality test that they like being in charge, you can bet they're more likely to be that way in a relationship. If someone indicates they are shy, you can expect them not to buzz around a room of strangers when they're at a party. I don't see how that is hogwash. These labels indicate personailty traits that are identified and expressed by the member - it's not exactly Karl Marx or dream analysis.

(Quote) Pat-5351 said: I think all this labeling is alot of hogwash myself, so I say find a girl you like, regardless of her...
(Quote) Pat-5351 said:

I think all this labeling is alot of hogwash myself, so I say find a girl you like, regardless of her "label," and see what happens.

--hide--

Mar 7th 2013 new

I appreciate that Michael... It's hard to find those girls, though. Few opportunities to plant that seed!


My sister lives in Kingston, btw. Ottawa is awsome.

Mar 7th 2013 new

I have only had a membership for a few weeks; therefore, have not noticed a trend with the "temperments", but in my opinion, the temperment test is not a very good indicator of the "real face" behind the profile and is quite arbitrary. I have taken the test a few times, at different times of the day and a different week and I get different results every time. Does this mean I'm a crazy person who can't make up their mind? Not at all. The questions asked are very open ended there is no "right" way to answer, one might answer a question based on their mood on that particular day. So to overlook a person based on the temperment test is probably not wise.

Mar 7th 2013 new

(Quote) Theodoric-68091 said: I'm rather sanguine myself - fun and spontaneous, silly even. I also have a touch of choleric...
(Quote) Theodoric-68091 said:

I'm rather sanguine myself - fun and spontaneous, silly even. I also have a touch of choleric. It's an occupational hazard. Despite my outwardly forward traits, my father told me that I should seek a woman that is gentle and soft. He felt that I would respond well to her expressions of emotions her softness with fuel my romantic inclinations. He once told me that I should seek a girl that blushes.

Largely ignoring his advice, I've dated a number of girls that are the opposite: fun and fiery. It hasn't worked particularily well. I don'tr respond well to continuous challenges or anger from the people I am with, and have often felt disrespected. The problem is, I can't seem to find someone gentle even when I try! I do believe it is important to be attracted to a person physically, at least initially, and almost every profile I look at is someone who is a Choleric-Sanguine mix!

I think that in the struggle for their faith, most Catholic women have been forced to build a fortress around them. They are strong, which is good, but they are often also aggressive. Maybe that's fine for beating away unwanted attention, but I often find it emasculating and disrespecful. I'm sure all the Cholerics will tell me I'm the problem, or that they're not telling me I'm the problem but pointing out that I sould recognise in myself that I'm the problem ;) I'm romantic and kind, but I can't find a woman with gentleness and holiness whom I'm attracted to.

I'm sure I may receive some heat for posting this, but other opinions are appreciated! 

--hide--

It's funny that you say this because I was just thinking that every guy I come in contact with is melancholic/phlegmatic just like me. I don't seem to do well with the same temperament I have. I've actually found the temperaments thing very helpful and usually spot on. Good luck and God bless you in your search!

 

Mar 7th 2013 new

(Quote) Theodoric-68091 said: If someone indictes in their personality test that they like being in charge, you can bet they...
(Quote) Theodoric-68091 said:

If someone indictes in their personality test that they like being in charge, you can bet they're more likely to be that way in a relationship. If someone indicates they are shy, you can expect them not to buzz around a room of strangers when they're at a party. I don't see how that is hogwash. These labels indicate personailty traits that are identified and expressed by the member - it's not exactly Karl Marx or dream analysis.

--hide--


I agree with you..Knowing how someone is going to react in a given situation is very important.. I wish I'd known the temperaments of some former relationships.. It might have changed the outcome if I'd known my melancholic (I think) ex-husband was going to go ballistic at the minor fender bender he was involved in.. Every little challenge was a major catastrophe in his eyes.

Mar 7th 2013 new

I have wondered if the questions weren't a little too vague. Honestly, 90% being choleric would not be an exaggeration! Having read what I've read, and knowing myself as I do, mine seems bang on. Perhaps they are a little more useful when the indicate a dramatic personality tendency... I'm 78% sanguine and I definitely am sanguine - I ask strangers for their opinion in the grocery store when I'm choosing vegtables!

Would you say that you are Sanguine and choleric? When you get different results, do you ever flip from Sanguine-Choleric to one of those and either Melancholic or Phlegmatic?

Mar 7th 2013 new
(Quote) Theodoric-68091 said: I'm rather sanguine myself - fun and spontaneous, silly even. I also have a touch of choleric. It's ...
(Quote) Theodoric-68091 said:

I'm rather sanguine myself - fun and spontaneous, silly even. I also have a touch of choleric. It's an occupational hazard. Despite my outwardly forward traits, my father told me that I should seek a woman that is gentle and soft. He felt that I would respond well to her expressions of emotions her softness with fuel my romantic inclinations. He once told me that I should seek a girl that blushes.



Largely ignoring his advice, I've dated a number of girls that are the opposite: fun and fiery. It hasn't worked particularily well. I don'tr respond well to continuous challenges or anger from the people I am with, and have often felt disrespected. The problem is, I can't seem to find someone gentle even when I try! I do believe it is important to be attracted to a person physically, at least initially, and almost every profile I look at is someone who is a Choleric-Sanguine mix!



I think that in the struggle for their faith, most Catholic women have been forced to build a fortress around them. They are strong, which is good, but they are often also aggressive. Maybe that's fine for beating away unwanted attention, but I often find it emasculating and disrespecful. I'm sure all the Cholerics will tell me I'm the problem, or that they're not telling me I'm the problem but pointing out that I sould recognise in myself that I'm the problem ;) I'm romantic and kind, but I can't find a woman with gentleness and holiness whom I'm attracted to.



I'm sure I may receive some heat for posting this, but other opinions are appreciated!

--hide--


Apparently everything I wrote disappeared. Lovely! I was just thinking that every guy I view on here is melancholic/phlegmatic just like me and that isn't a good thing for me. I think the temperaments thing is a very good tool and it seems to be really accurate, at least that's been my experience. Best of luck in your search! biggrin
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