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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Mar 16th 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: It would be if you contacted ME. BTW, Donna lives near you.
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:


It would be if you contacted ME.

BTW, Donna lives near you.

--hide--


Not near enough to make up a 20 year age difference.. My oldest son will be 39 in October.. eyepopping

Mar 16th 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: Great comments, Ray.Or get the heck out of the way so that the rest of us can mov...
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

Great comments, Ray.



Or get the heck out of the way so that the rest of us can move on with our lives.

--hide--
Well, Marge, that's another approach... laughing

Mar 16th 2013 new

(Quote) Ray-566531 said: Somebody has to start something or else nothing happens.
(Quote) Ray-566531 said: Somebody has to start something or else nothing happens.
--hide--

Dead right.
However, it's NOT happening for most people we know. Why the heck not? What is the big deal?
As Donna said at the outset, What are people afraid of?
This isn't a sixth grade dance, people. If you can function at your employment, you can function on email. Get going.

Mar 16th 2013 new

I'm serious, kiddo. Three quarters of the folks here aren't at all serious about meeting someone and they are wasting the time of those of us who are.

Mar 16th 2013 new

Ask the ugly girl to dance, Jim.

Mar 16th 2013 new

I would take away the games/activities.
We had a gathering in Boston one year in a bar. As you'd expect, there were TVs all over with various sports events playing. I walked up to one fellow and said, "How's it going?" He scowled and replied, "I'm watching the game."
He could have done that at home. Why did he come to meet the rest of us if he wasn't going to interact with anyone?

Mar 16th 2013 new

If you fear emotional intimacy you aren't ready for a relationship.
As I said higher on the thread, in that case, get out of the way now, and come back later when you're ready to do serious business.

Mar 16th 2013 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: Have been having a little email debate with a fella who feels that maybe people aren't properl...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:

Have been having a little email debate with a fella who feels that maybe people aren't properly educated in finding a spouse. He seems to feel that the Catholic Church should have a system of education and/or coercion that makes people get together..I have often maintained that FEAR keeps people from finding their HAPPINESS.. I went to check my FB feed and found this Meme there..


When Love Knocks at your Door,

Just Breathe, Relax, and Let it In.

Because Being Afraid of Happiness is Complete Nonsense.


Any thoughts?

--hide--

Okay, I am supposed to be avoiding the forums for Lent, except for the prayer forums and the Pope forums, but I can't stand it - I have to comment here!

Donna, you are 100% right!!!!!

Most people think that hate is the opposite of love. But, it isn't.

FEAR is the opposite of LOVE! FEAR is the enemy! FEAR does NOT come from GOD because GOD IS LOVE.

When you let FEAR stop you from doing anything in life, you are handing over your power to you-know-who.

You are not acting as Christ has instructed you to act - that is, out of LOVE!Remember St. Paul saying "the greatest of these is LOVE".

When you let go of the FEAR, it is as if a giant weight has floated up off of your shoulders! Your step lightens, your heart becomes more joyful, your mind embraces all kinds of new thoughts, actions, opportunities (and you have the courage to pursue them!), you make new friends (because you reach out to people and it doesn't matter if they reach back to you.)

In other words, you start showing love to all around you (just as Christ did), and pretty soon people (including members of the opposite sex) start noticing this - they can see that you are more open to them and they start responding to you in a very positive fashion!

So, LET GO OF THE FEAR! It will change your life in ways that you can't even imagine - and that includes finding the "love of your life".

Is it easy to do? Not initially, but it gets easier really, really fast. All you have to do is try it once or twice and see how it feels, and then try it a few more times, and you will notice it's getting easier, and pretty soon it will become a habit (because if you do anything for 3 weeks daily, it does become a habit - that has been proven.)

When you stop yourself from doing something because you are afraid (he/she won't answer my message, he/she won't like me, he/she won't be interested in me because I'm fill-in-the-blank, he/she is too fill-in-the-blank for me - and these are all examples of not doing something because you are afraid), no one loses out but you - because you are making an assumption that very well may not be true and you are acting out of FEAR rather than LOVE (both love for the other and love for yourself)

So, JUST DO IT! LET GO OF THE FEAR!

Donna is right. She has seen it here over and over. Listen to her experience and the knowlege she has gained from it.

THANK YOU, DONNA for starting this topic! wave It is invaluable!!! hug

Mar 16th 2013 new

(Quote) Patricia-29176 said: Okay, I am supposed to be avoiding the forums for Lent, except for the prayer...
(Quote) Patricia-29176 said:

Okay, I am supposed to be avoiding the forums for Lent, except for the prayer forums and the Pope forums, but I can't stand it - I have to comment here!

Donna, you are 100% right!!!!!

Most people think that hate is the opposite of love. But, it isn't.

FEAR is the opposite of LOVE! FEAR is the enemy! FEAR does NOT come from GOD because GOD IS LOVE.

When you let FEAR stop you from doing anything in life, you are handing over your power to you-know-who.

You are not acting as Christ has instructed you to act - that is, out of LOVE!Remember St. Paul saying "the greatest of these is LOVE".

When you let go of the FEAR, it is as if a giant weight has floated up off of your shoulders! Your step lightens, your heart becomes more joyful, your mind embraces all kinds of new thoughts, actions, opportunities (and you have the courage to pursue them!), you make new friends (because you reach out to people and it doesn't matter if they reach back to you.)

In other words, you start showing love to all around you (just as Christ did), and pretty soon people (including members of the opposite sex) start noticing this - they can see that you are more open to them and they start responding to you in a very positive fashion!

So, LET GO OF THE FEAR! It will change your life in ways that you can't even imagine - and that includes finding the "love of your life".

Is it easy to do? Not initially, but it gets easier really, really fast. All you have to do is try it once or twice and see how it feels, and then try it a few more times, and you will notice it's getting easier, and pretty soon it will become a habit (because if you do anything for 3 weeks daily, it does become a habit - that has been proven.)

When you stop yourself from doing something because you are afraid (he/she won't answer my message, he/she won't like me, he/she won't be interested in me because I'm fill-in-the-blank, he/she is too fill-in-the-blank for me - and these are all examples of not doing something because you are afraid), no one loses out but you - because you are making an assumption that very well may not be true and you are acting out of FEAR rather than LOVE (both love for the other and love for yourself)

So, JUST DO IT! LET GO OF THE FEAR!

Donna is right. She has seen it here over and over. Listen to her experience and the knowlege she has gained from it.

THANK YOU, DONNA for starting this topic! It is invaluable!!!

--hide--


We eliminate ourselves from possible relationships because we think the other person won't accept us all the time.. Example: If I read a profile and see that the man has a doctoral degree, I am immediately intimidated from contacting him.. Because I figure I'm just a lowly LPN/Painter/Knitter and how could he possibly be interested in me? We put words in their mouth and thoughts in their heads from our own fear. Some people do it because they think the other person is too attractive, or too tall, or too thin etc... A whole bunch of reasons. It's all fear of rejection, so we just don't try.

Mar 16th 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: Ask the ugly girl to dance, Jim.
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

Ask the ugly girl to dance, Jim.

--hide--


I don't think anyone is ugly and I stink at dancing, so thanks for the advice. wink


Not all of the guys are scared. Some of us prefer to go slowly at first. Nothing wrong with that.

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