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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people 45+. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is told in chapters 11-25 of the book of Genesis.
Learn More:Abraham & Sarah

. . . marry a widow with seven children? eyepopping


Two are out of the house, the youngest three are in elementary school. Their mother owns their house and has almost no debt.

Would he, necessarily, have to be insane? faint



Hypothetically, that is. scratchchin

Just sayin',


Kate wave

Mar 17th 2013 new
(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said: . . . marry a widow with seven children? Two are out of the house, the youngest three are in elem...
(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said:

. . . marry a widow with seven children?


Two are out of the house, the youngest three are in elementary school. Their mother owns their house and has almost no debt.

Would he, necessarily, have to be insane?



Hypothetically, that is.

Just sayin',


Kate

--hide--
Insane? Not at all; he'd just have to be in love with the woman and her children. Besides, who doesn't love children?
Mar 17th 2013 new

(Quote) Brad-937504 said: Insane? Not at all; he'd just have to be in love with the woman and her children. Besides, who doesn&...
(Quote) Brad-937504 said: Insane? Not at all; he'd just have to be in love with the woman and her children. Besides, who doesn't love children?
--hide--

Great response from a great man. Way to go Brad !!!clap clap clap

Mar 17th 2013 new

(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said: . . . marry a widow with seven children? Two are out of the house, the youngest thre...
(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said:

. . . marry a widow with seven children?


Two are out of the house, the youngest three are in elementary school. Their mother owns their house and has almost no debt.

Would he, necessarily, have to be insane?



Hypothetically, that is.

Just sayin',


Kate

--hide--


I know two couples from here that brought together 10 and 11 children total in each blended family.. These were both LDR's. One set of children were moved from CA to KY and the other set were moved from MO to FL..

Mar 17th 2013 new

(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said: . . . marry a widow with seven children? Two are out of the house, the youngest thre...
(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said:

. . . marry a widow with seven children?


Two are out of the house, the youngest three are in elementary school. Their mother owns their house and has almost no debt.

Would he, necessarily, have to be insane?



Hypothetically, that is.

Just sayin',


Kate

--hide--


Kate,

First, allow me to say I am sorry you are widowed at such an early age. God had a different plan for your husband. May his soul rest in eternal peace. With that said, Our Blessed Lord left you will a heavy cross to bear but as you know, He never gives us more than He thinks we can handle.

Regarding your thread topic - it may be difficult but certainly not impossible for another man to love you for the wonderful lady you are and your lovely children. I know if I were in your age range, I would have no trouble falling in love with a woman and her children. Since I love children, although it would be a challenge, I would not mind helping to rear the remaining five and watching them grow into responsible and loving adults.

When I divorced, my children were 9 and 6. They are now 30 and 27. Both have their masters degrees and doing well in their respective professions. My daughter and son-in-law have even blessed me with 2 wonderful grandchildren. I just had two so I certainly have a feel what is involved in rearing children. So,you can see wonderful days are in your future.

Just keep praying to the Lord, keep focused and realize some days will be more difficult than others. It is all in the mindset.

Your future husband may or may not be on CM but through some other source. No matter, when that time comes, he will be one very fortunate man. Then, as young as you are, you will be able to enjoy great-grandchildren. See how bright the future will be for you?

I pray you experience joy, happiness, peace and lots of love.

I wish you well.


Blessings, Praying hug rose

Leon




Mar 17th 2013 new

(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said: . . . marry a widow with seven children? Two are out of the house, the youngest thre...
(Quote) Kathryn-328433 said:

. . . marry a widow with seven children?


Two are out of the house, the youngest three are in elementary school. Their mother owns their house and has almost no debt.

Would he, necessarily, have to be insane?



Hypothetically, that is.

Just sayin',


Kate

--hide--
Ummm, Kathryn -- just checking the math. You said seven children -- two are out of the house; the youngest three are in elementary school......

That leaves 2 unaccounted for. Do you have so many that you have a hard time keeping track of them? scratchchin scratchchin

Seriously, I think your chances are as good as anyone else's. That doesn't mean it will be easy to find the right someone. Sadly you became a widow and single parent at a young age. That works for and against you, as you no doubt realize. You're young enough to have the energy to raise your children. But....even considering that, it's still a daunting load to carry.

Your youth and attractiveness (needless to say, your personality) will work in your favor. The fact you are financially independent is a definite plus. It's sometimes difficult, especially in these economic times, to have adequate resources, even with two of you pooling your assets.

Keep smiling and keep looking but with patience and hope. A few prayers won't hurt either.

Mar 17th 2013 new

Ray makes a good point: it has always seemed to me that many men shy away from women with children because they are nervous about the expense of supporting a big family from the get-go.

Mar 18th 2013 new

Maybe a little insane

But that is love.

You may remember that you and your husband didn't always agree on everything concerning parenting and your kids. How will you handle a similar situation with a man, who is your husband, but is not the father of your children? Assuming this man does not know your children right now and they do not know him, to be happy in your future, not only must you be happy but so must your husband and your children. If you have a plan that you can discuss with a man, before you are married, that would be very helpful.

Mar 18th 2013 new

(Quote) Lawrence-943343 said: If you have a plan that you can discuss with a man, before you are married, that would be very helpfu...
(Quote) Lawrence-943343 said: If you have a plan that you can discuss with a man, before you are married, that would be very helpful.
--hide--


I still have two teens at home. I think my plan would be:
1. Kids, you will treat this man with the respect due to any adult member of the family.
2. Kids, you will treat this man with charity due to his being the apple of your mother's eye.
3. Kids, you will do nothing that will create disharmony between husband and wife. (This is easy to explain to a teen, much more difficult when the kids are younger.)
4. Husband, you will express your opinions in front of the children calmly. You will not act like a child when others -- including myself -- disagree.
5. Husband, you will consult with me privately when you think the kid is out of line or that I am permitting/making a bad decision.
6. Husband, I promise that I will listen carefully to your advice, but you must understand that my relationship with the kids is longer than yours. I know them better than you do, though I appreciate that your "third party" point of view can bring valuable insights.
7. Kids and husband, remember that mom is performing a balancing act between raising kids and caring for a lover. Don't make me choose between you -- because you won't like the outcome.

Mar 20th 2013 new

Sure it's possible!

I have a friend who found herself suddenly on her own raising 6 kids - ages 2 to 15. She doubted she'd ever remarry. However, she met a man raising 2 of his own, of ages between her oldest and #3 child. They married 10 years ago, have 5 currently in or done with college or trade school, 3 still left in at home. (Her youngest, now age 12, is one of my Goddaughters.) heart

I've spent some time with the couple over the years, and they both felt led to each other and their new life together. It just blended so easily, things fell into place so smoothly. The man is a wonderful father figure to all her children, they quickly grew to love and respect him. Neat people - both of them. Kids are all doing well too.

Matter of fact - this week they are in Haiti - finalizing the adoption of a 15 yr old girl my girlfriend met a few years ago on a mission trip with church. Just 'felt the call' and she and her husband prayed about it. He went on the next mission trip and called her to tell her he met this young lady and was starting the paperwork. It's taken almost 2 years, and slowly everything has fallen into place. So they will be bringing home a 'new' 15 yr old daughter next week - she'll be child #9. hug

Their faith that anything is possible has gotten them through so much - it's a joy to watch them as a family. They remain 'open' to His signs, and try to follow where He leads them, even when it doesn't seem to make sense. rolling eyes eyepopping

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