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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

02/21/2013 new

(Quote) Christine-924384 said: . . . If/when you go to mediation, make sure you are in control of your emotions and remain...
(Quote) Christine-924384 said:

. . . If/when you go to mediation, make sure you are in control of your emotions and remain calm, (even if inside you are screaming). Don't interrupt your ex to defend yourself, you will have time to speak. Like David said, the mediators are good at assessing what is really going on. You are in my prayers for sure

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clap clap Great advice!

02/21/2013 new
(Quote) Alice-788574 said: Prayers needed. Ex is saber-rattling. He wanted everything, got everything, and it seems, after a couple of yea...
(Quote) Alice-788574 said:

Prayers needed. Ex is saber-rattling. He wanted everything, got everything, and it seems, after a couple of years trying to manage a large household, is finding it too difficult. He wants me to take the kids more (I would love to) but won't help with child support (in fact, wants me to pay him - I work part time while he has a thriving career - makes sense). I wonder, if parenting and child support can be adjusted, I might finally be able to leave this partial exile from my children and actually live with them again.



But then, I've already seen a lot of injustice. The pure cost of a post-decree motion could destroy his finances, and what little I have, will be gone. I hate the court system.



I'm trying to engage him in some kind of discussion to address his grievances, but he won't respond to a phone massage or email. The threatened me with court on Friday when I picked up the kids and I had a severe panic attack Friday night and beginning of Saturday - couldn't sleep because I kept dreaming about different scenarios. I think, at this point, I've given up - God will do what He will do.

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"Jesus I trust in You." Repeat it over and over until it sinks in and your peace is restored. Satan is prowling around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour, don't let it be you. Trust Our Lord, HE LOVES YOU!!!
02/21/2013 new

I did speak with my attorney and she advised to just stick with the J&D. So it is, and I am able to visit the kids at their home. His tune changed considerably on Monday after I told him I would not be moved from our original agreement. The bluster seems to have faded. He knows court would not be a wise choice.


Thanks for your prayers. I've decided not to give up CM for Lent. The easy route is to hole up in a cacoon and be reclusive. It's harder to put myself out here.

02/21/2013 new

I have no advice Alice, ust prayers for you & your kids. Praying

03/18/2013 new
Alice the child support can be influenced by how much time the noncustodial spouse has the children. So if he is asking to spend less hours with the children to let's say work more hours and increase his income he will need to contribute more financially to you and the children. Sometimes you can meet with a mediator and that way you don't have to go to court or use a lawyer. The mediator works for the courts but is objective and works with the law which most likely favor you.Hope this helps.
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