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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Mar 30th 2013 new

(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've ...
(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've known for eons). I suppose you could say I have a phobia for dancing. I have no sense of rhythm and can't seem to relax physically enough to let go on a dance floor. I've always been this way-- never learned how to dance (Never did that sleepover activity of spinning a few 45s and trying out moves with teen girlfriends), have some really bad memories of dances from high school (fist fights, bullying, etc) and I am just very self conscious. Also, when I meet new people I want to talk with them, not engage in some kind of physical activity. Dances rarely have an environment conducive to conversation. The music is too loud and I find myself fumbling with a drink or pulling on the hem of my sweater, etc.

This is NOT to say I am shy or dull. At one time I thought I was, but when I learned I do make mistakes, I realized that I was wrong about that. I am actually very outgoing (ask anyone who knows, has met me, from the forums) and I have acquired some skills at being entertaining. (Evidently some people find me bubbly, funny, smart, and entertaining. I can even be a gracious hostess.)

So why do people think that single adults want to meet at a dance? Aren't their better social environments than reliving our teen years? YUCK!

Your thoughts?

(And if you are going to try to convince me that I should embrace dancing--- along the lines of "I Hope You Dance"--- then remember that this ballerina princess is a cracked dream; please be gentle.)
--hide--


Welcome back Dawn,

I love to dance so dances..However, events which provide opportunities to be able to communicate more could be walks,hikes,games night/day.Coordinating and training for events religous,sporting,fundraising are activities which also allows us to get to know people better.



Mar 30th 2013 new

I LOVE dancing, but I agree that's not the best way to meet people. It really is too loud. I've danced with strangers before and we didn't learn much about each other except maybe what our day jobs were and where we were from. Oh, and whether we liked dancing together. Granted, none of them were guys I'd feel comfortable sitting down and chatting with. One guy suggested we get together and practice dancing some more, but he weirded me out, so I got away from him as quickly as possible. I know one couple who met dancing and eventually got married, but that's really rare, I think. I guess you can meet people dancing, but I think that only works if you like dancing to begin with.

Mar 30th 2013 new
(Quote) Sharon-885911 said: You don't have to be the best dancer in the world to enjoy dancing. In fact my boyfriend took me dancing ...
(Quote) Sharon-885911 said:

You don't have to be the best dancer in the world to enjoy dancing. In fact my boyfriend took me dancing this evening. I would like to learn some on the newer dances even at my age. In the mid-west anyway line dancing is popular and you don't even need a partner just get on the dace floor and do your thing and follow the person in front or beside you.

--hide--


Line dancing is so much fun. There is a line dance ministry here in NY that goes around to different churches and teaches line dancing. They draw lots of people. The proceeds go to the church. Unfortunately, it was not much of a singles event. It was about 90% women. Buts that's NY for ya.
Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've ...
(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've known for eons). I suppose you could say I have a phobia for dancing. I have no sense of rhythm and can't seem to relax physically enough to let go on a dance floor. I've always been this way-- never learned how to dance (Never did that sleepover activity of spinning a few 45s and trying out moves with teen girlfriends), have some really bad memories of dances from high school (fist fights, bullying, etc) and I am just very self conscious. Also, when I meet new people I want to talk with them, not engage in some kind of physical activity. Dances rarely have an environment conducive to conversation. The music is too loud and I find myself fumbling with a drink or pulling on the hem of my sweater, etc.

This is NOT to say I am shy or dull. At one time I thought I was, but when I learned I do make mistakes, I realized that I was wrong about that. I am actually very outgoing (ask anyone who knows, has met me, from the forums) and I have acquired some skills at being entertaining. (Evidently some people find me bubbly, funny, smart, and entertaining. I can even be a gracious hostess.)

So why do people think that single adults want to meet at a dance? Aren't their better social environments than reliving our teen years? YUCK!

Your thoughts?

(And if you are going to try to convince me that I should embrace dancing--- along the lines of "I Hope You Dance"--- then remember that this ballerina princess is a cracked dream; please be gentle.)
--hide--
: wave Dawn Maybe take a dance class (first time) type of class; yeah i know some charge like $40.00 some are cheaper some might be free; so if your free (have time ya might take up a oh ya know a basic dance class hey it takes Two to "tango"! so chill and enjoy it!! and you might meet somebody there too! Mike "peace"!!

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've ...
(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've known for eons). I suppose you could say I have a phobia for dancing. I have no sense of rhythm and can't seem to relax physically enough to let go on a dance floor. I've always been this way-- never learned how to dance (Never did that sleepover activity of spinning a few 45s and trying out moves with teen girlfriends), have some really bad memories of dances from high school (fist fights, bullying, etc) and I am just very self conscious. Also, when I meet new people I want to talk with them, not engage in some kind of physical activity. Dances rarely have an environment conducive to conversation. The music is too loud and I find myself fumbling with a drink or pulling on the hem of my sweater, etc.

This is NOT to say I am shy or dull. At one time I thought I was, but when I learned I do make mistakes, I realized that I was wrong about that. I am actually very outgoing (ask anyone who knows, has met me, from the forums) and I have acquired some skills at being entertaining. (Evidently some people find me bubbly, funny, smart, and entertaining. I can even be a gracious hostess.)

So why do people think that single adults want to meet at a dance? Aren't their better social environments than reliving our teen years? YUCK!

Your thoughts?

(And if you are going to try to convince me that I should embrace dancing--- along the lines of "I Hope You Dance"--- then remember that this ballerina princess is a cracked dream; please be gentle.)
--hide--


I took 9 years of dance, had fun at school dances, but wedding receptions can bore me. laughing I haven't slow-danced since high school!

Apr 1st 2013 new

Dancing seems to be rather popular where I live. There are many dance studios or other dance events that offer lessons (usually for an hour) followed by open dancing. For me, the lesson is the perfect way to break the ice with people around me. That first hour helps me work out the kinks in my West Coast Swing (or whatever style) and I'll usually crack a joke or two about my need for practice. From there, the rest of the evening is easy.


I find that partner dancing helps me to embrace my awesome womanhood in the sense that to be a good partner, I must react well and follow the lead. I've also witnessed dancing (swing in particular) help many a shy man to break out of his shell. To be honest, I haven't had much experience with dances being awkard, but perhaps I've miraculously avoided the ones with awfully loud music, bad punch, and singles lining the walls. If so, I'm grateful.

Apr 1st 2013 new

(Quote) Tara-9 I haven't slow-danced since high school!
(Quote) Tara-9 I haven't slow-danced since high school!

--hide--

I haven't danced (fast and slow) in 23 days, and will be dancing again very soon, including Kentucky Derby day.

Before that, I hadn't danced in several years.

Apr 1st 2013 new

(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've ...
(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've known for eons). I suppose you could say I have a phobia for dancing. I have no sense of rhythm and can't seem to relax physically enough to let go on a dance floor. I've always been this way-- never learned how to dance (Never did that sleepover activity of spinning a few 45s and trying out moves with teen girlfriends), have some really bad memories of dances from high school (fist fights, bullying, etc) and I am just very self conscious. Also, when I meet new people I want to talk with them, not engage in some kind of physical activity. Dances rarely have an environment conducive to conversation. The music is too loud and I find myself fumbling with a drink or pulling on the hem of my sweater, etc.

This is NOT to say I am shy or dull. At one time I thought I was, but when I learned I do make mistakes, I realized that I was wrong about that. I am actually very outgoing (ask anyone who knows, has met me, from the forums) and I have acquired some skills at being entertaining. (Evidently some people find me bubbly, funny, smart, and entertaining. I can even be a gracious hostess.)

So why do people think that single adults want to meet at a dance? Aren't their better social environments than reliving our teen years? YUCK!

Your thoughts?

(And if you are going to try to convince me that I should embrace dancing--- along the lines of "I Hope You Dance"--- then remember that this ballerina princess is a cracked dream; please be gentle.)
--hide--
For now, we'll address the dancing situation.

First of all, Dawn, I know you are thankful you have 2 feet -- even though they both lefties.

Dancing? Not to worry. It isn't for everybody, but more people (especially women) enjoy it than not. There aren't many Fred Astaires or Ginger Rogers. As the saying goes, "Dance is if nobody is watching."

The biggest problem isn't lack of ability -- it's lack of knowledge and confidence. If you want to polish your act, there are many groups that offer dance lessons -- from basic to advanced. Some school recreation departments offer short-term dance lessons to adults. It's to learn the basics -- well enough to get out there. Learning the basics can give you the confidence you don't have at the present.

You have less of a problem because a male partner will be leading. You just have to follow. A good leader should recognize the skill level of his partner and dance accordingly. His job is to make a woman look good on the dance floor.

Years ago I felt like a total klutz on the dance floor, and basically just paddled around, using some basic steps. Obviously the confidence level in this area was below zero. After the loss of my wife, I signed up for lessons at a senior citizens' center. It was ongoing, and involved the basics, plus a few added steps for good measure. After having had the benefit of a professional instructor, dancing skills improved and the confidence level soared. In other words, I went from "YUCK" to -- "Hey, this is fun." Good exercise, too.

Mistakes? Well, laugh them off and keep going. Perfection is elusive, but skill levels increase with more dancing. Indeed, it is a source of enjoyment now and I'm looking back occasionally thinking about what I've missed all that time. Dancing lessons helped to look forward -- part of the re-inventing process of a widower.

You can look at the negative side -- the music which is nowadays louder than it should be, difficulty conversing while dancing, and so on. But the songs end, and there's time for chatting in between. You don't have to be out there for every song.

It's a rare individual who has no sense of the music's beat. Practicing usually takes care of that. Within our class there were people who never danced before (and it showed -- but the rest of us have all been there, too). It was amazing what they could learn in a short period of time, despite the fact the initial impression was that they are hopeless.

If you learn the basics, get out there for the purpose of having fun, your perspective might completely change. At least you'll have developed another social skill -- that can't hurt (unless you crunch your partner's foot). Yeah, that's always a posibility, but not one to lose sleep over.

Enjoy!!!

Apr 1st 2013 new

(Quote) Tara-916865 said: I took 9 years of dance, had fun at school dances, but wedding receptions can bore me...
(Quote) Tara-916865 said:


I took 9 years of dance, had fun at school dances, but wedding receptions can bore me. I haven't slow-danced since high school!

--hide--
May I have the honor of the next dance, Tara???? hug

Apr 1st 2013 new
(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've known for ...
(Quote) Dawn-58330 said: I have never been comfortable with meeting new people at dances (or for that matter, with people I've known for eons). I suppose you could say I have a phobia for dancing. I have no sense of rhythm and can't seem to relax physically enough to let go on a dance floor. I've always been this way-- never learned how to dance (Never did that sleepover activity of spinning a few 45s and trying out moves with teen girlfriends), have some really bad memories of dances from high school (fist fights, bullying, etc) and I am just very self conscious. Also, when I meet new people I want to talk with them, not engage in some kind of physical activity. Dances rarely have an environment conducive to conversation. The music is too loud and I find myself fumbling with a drink or pulling on the hem of my sweater, etc.



This is NOT to say I am shy or dull. At one time I thought I was, but when I learned I do make mistakes, I realized that I was wrong about that. I am actually very outgoing (ask anyone who knows, has met me, from the forums) and I have acquired some skills at being entertaining. (Evidently some people find me bubbly, funny, smart, and entertaining. I can even be a gracious hostess.)



So why do people think that single adults want to meet at a dance? Aren't their better social environments than reliving our teen years? YUCK!



Your thoughts?



(And if you are going to try to convince me that I should embrace dancing--- along the lines of "I Hope You Dance"--- then remember that this ballerina princess is a cracked dream; please be gentle.)
--hide--


I have started a new obligation, to wear my high heels at least two hours a day. Practice makes perfect.

Then maybe I can begin to dance.
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