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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

To read or not to read

04/02/2013 new

For any of you out there that have received your Decree of Nulity, did you read the testimony that was submitted? I would love to hear from you if you did or did not and why. Blessings to all.

04/02/2013 new

I read the testimonies.. I didn't expect there to be anything 'bad' about me so I felt safe doing so. My brothers testimony brought me to tears because his was to explain how our dad's drinking affected us.. He saw events the same way I did so it was a tearjerker..

04/02/2013 new

(Quote) Dana-782979 said: For any of you out there that have received your Decree of Nulity, did you read the testimony that...
(Quote) Dana-782979 said:

For any of you out there that have received your Decree of Nulity, did you read the testimony that was submitted? I would love to hear from you if you did or did not and why. Blessings to all.

--hide--


No I did not, I didn't know that you could.

04/02/2013 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: I read the testimonies.. I didn't expect there to be anything 'bad' about me so I felt...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:

I read the testimonies.. I didn't expect there to be anything 'bad' about me so I felt safe doing so. My brothers testimony brought me to tears because his was to explain how our dad's drinking affected us.. He saw events the same way I did so it was a tearjerker..

--hide--


Donna,
I don't expect anything bad, either, just honesty so maybe that could be bad laughing eyepopping weeping I guess I hope to use it for growth and maybe, hopefully closure. I did ask to read what my ex wrote but I'm not sure exactly what all I will get to see. I guess I will find out next Tuesday.

04/02/2013 new

(Quote) Dana-782979 said: For any of you out there that have received your Decree of Nulity, did you read the testimony that...
(Quote) Dana-782979 said:

For any of you out there that have received your Decree of Nulity, did you read the testimony that was submitted? I would love to hear from you if you did or did not and why. Blessings to all.

--hide--
Yes, I did. First of all, my ex-husband pushed me to get going on the annulment. He had interviewed at his parish for it, but was told he had no grounds. He had chosen first to remarry civilly, then to worry about the decree of nullity. At that time, I was in no rush to file it; he said it was MY fault that he could not receive Communion at Mass and it embarrassed him in front of our son, so I better move on it.

I was involved with the Beginning Experience ministry for a long time, and its process helped me pour out a lot of pertinent detail very honestly for those 108 questions. My witnesses, people I was no longer in contact with, had said they'd write something, but I had no idea what they'd say. Once the annulment was granted, I asked to see the testimonies. I was very eager to read my ex-husband's answers to all those questions, as I didn't know his take on most of what they asked about.

It felt good to read my two witnesses' responses, as they were honest and confirmed things for me.

My ex had not bothered to write anything.

I was told he did come in and read my responses.

That made me feel very angry, robbed and cheated. And all the more grateful for receiving the decree, to be spiritually freed of him.

04/03/2013 new

I read the testimonies of the witnesses, as well as my former spouse. My former in-laws were very kind, especially my former father-in-law. He really liked me and I think that he has removed himself from my and the kids lives because his son's choices hurt him so much. I think my former spouse's family is in denial about the mental illness of their son/brother.


My witnesses focused their concern on the declining mental health of my former spouse. THey knew him well and observed him "lose it" mentally over the course of 27 years, so much so that they requested that he not me able to read their witness statement (which the diocese granted). When he found out that he was not able to read my witness statements he chose not to read any of the statements.


I think that it is important to read the statements; otherwise you will always wonder what was written.



04/03/2013 new

I was less than impressed with the process when I went through it, but I read everything -- mine and his.

04/03/2013 new

First annulment was "In Fact" and I didn't know it was an option nor was it ever offered. :-(

Second was an Annulment of "Form". The only two witnesses were my young adult children who call me to ask how they should answer!

04/03/2013 new

(Quote) Elizabeth-929069 said: I was less than impressed with the process when I went through it, but I read everything -- m...
(Quote) Elizabeth-929069 said:

I was less than impressed with the process when I went through it, but I read everything -- mine and his.

--hide--


I was also less than impressed with the process...actually quite disappointed. A waste of time and money? Yeah.

04/03/2013 new

(Quote) Dana-782979 said: For any of you out there that have received your Decree of Nulity, did you read the testimony that...
(Quote) Dana-782979 said:

For any of you out there that have received your Decree of Nulity, did you read the testimony that was submitted? I would love to hear from you if you did or did not and why. Blessings to all.

--hide--
I never knew I had the option. scratchchin

Just for the record,I'd like to say that these Diocesan Tribunals are anullment Mills.Yep,that's right.I knew a Judge on a tribunal here in So. California,who left the Diocese,because(after 14 years as a Judge)he was pressured by the Bishop to sign off on Declarations of Nullity that were in fact Valid Marriages.He refused,and told the Bishop to take a hike.The Bishop was worried that the people may leave the Church and go elsewhere.Isn't it nice to know that these Liberals are looking out for your souls.Oh,don't worry.If you did everthing in good Faith,it's not on your conscience,but on the members of the Tribunal.The only reason I accepted mine as being valid is that the said Judge was a witness in my case,and told me that he was certain my Marriage was invalid.Otherwise,I would not have ever trusted these American Tribunals.If you think I am harsh,remember that both Popes JPll and Benedict XVl both said there are too many declarations of nullity in the USA.

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