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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Mar 30th 2013 new
(Quote) Laura-824866 said: I was told you had to wait 1 year after the divorce was final. I started about 4 months prior to that year mar...
(Quote) Laura-824866 said:

I was told you had to wait 1 year after the divorce was final. I started about 4 months prior to that year mark, everything was submitted about a month before...they went ahead & started processing it. I had my 1st decision by shortly after the 1year anniversary...still waiting for the 2nd :) any day now...tic toc, tic toc

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What I have seen is the waiting period can vary from Tribunal to Tribunal and it can be changed. It also, I was told, has to do with how long the couple had lived apart/been estranged before the divorce was final. That time can go toward the waiting period.

It does seem to make sense that the Church would want to see if there will be a reconciliation; the waiting period could also be good to slow down the 'moving on process'. Rebounds, lack of adequate adjustment and grieving time....I think we see the Church, in her wisdom, trying to help us in the wisest way possible.
Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Carmen-841680 said: Will, thank you so much for this information. I have decided to be very conservative about datin...
(Quote) Carmen-841680 said:

Will, thank you so much for this information. I have decided to be very conservative about dating until the annulment is complete. I would dislike to fall for someone, just to have the annulment rejected. How awful would that be? You gave me peace in your words and will give my parish the benefit. Thank you again. My prayers are with you.

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Carmen,

We both belong to the same Archdiocese. I am living proof not all annulments are initially approved. The details are too long or appropriate to discuss in this type of forum. I will say it did take lots of persistence to have the Tribunal look at my petition through another set of "eyes". I was not going to give up without exhausting all my options. I was told by a member of the Tribunal, the far majority just drop it and don't pursue. Then of course the process had to be approved by the Regional Tribunal in San Antonio. All in all, it took 18 months from me turning in my petition through the Regional's decision.

Counting all the initial required documents, the various fees and other set of "eyes", it cost me $604.11. Not everyone can pay that amount and the Tribunal takes it on a case by case basis.

I strongly urge all seeking an annulment to begin the process as soon as your diocese/archdiocese allows.

Carmen, I wish you well in your journey.

Happy Easter.


Blessings, Praying hug rose


Leon

Mar 31st 2013 new
In retrospect, I would have started writing the stories of his life, my life and our life even before I requested the annulment application papers. It was much more of a project than I ever imagined and took several months and many, many, many hours. This writing process was so important but I didn't realize that until I started. Seeing the big picture by putting all the pieces in some semblance of order was truly healing and helped me look forward.

May Our Lord and His Mother be with you...
Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Jolynn-776398 said: I was married for 5 yrs. I was never married in the Catholic Church do I still need an annulment?
(Quote) Jolynn-776398 said: I was married for 5 yrs. I was never married in the Catholic Church do I still need an annulment?
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Yes..You will still need some kind of annulment, but quite possibly it will be the short form called a Lack of Canonical Form.

Apr 1st 2013 new
Thank you so much !!
Apr 3rd 2013 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: The person that told you you have to wait a year was probably hoping that you would r...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:


The person that told you you have to wait a year was probably hoping that you would reconcile.. I know many people here that started their annulment immediately after the divorce was final..

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Donna, the Wichita Diocese requires one full calendar year pass between the civil divorce and consideration for annulment. They claim to be making certain there is no reconcilliation.

Apr 6th 2013 new

(Quote) Carol-737878 said: (Quote) Carmen-841680 said: Hello everyone! I am back. I do not know if yo...
(Quote) Carol-737878 said:

Quote:
Carmen-841680 said:

Hello everyone! I am back. I do not know if you recall my confusion about my priest telling me that an annulment process is initiated when I am in the works of remarrying. I spoke to him again today and told him it had been 4 years since my divorce and logging into and reading the forum of annulments, I expressed to him that I would like to start the process because I should not be dating. Especially after reading an article on Catholicmatch. He told me again that it was not necessary to begin the process unless I have someone in mind. And as far as dating, I could date as long as there is no intimacy. I was insistant and explained that my ex-husband has remarried, and why not go ahead and start. He said he would give my name and number to the annulment committee in the church so that they would get back with me. However, a case needs to be made in order for the annulment to go through. Can anyone tell me, why is he giving me a hard time? When I fill out my papers and explain what happened, isn't that when the decision is made? Is there any other way of filing without going through my church? My goodness, this is so frustrating. Please pray for me. I want to do the right thing.



Carmen, PLEASE talk directly to your diocesan tribunal to get your facts straight! I'm not sure where exactly Fr. Hector Medina is right now--You can look him up on line (as I'm sorry to say, I haven't) but he is somewhere in Texas. He is a very pastoral priest who has the information you need to hear in regard to annulments. Your priest shouldn't be making this decision for you. I was a field advocate for the Archdiocese of Indianapolis for many years & have gone through an annulment myself. Also, there are some fact-filled books available that can answer your questions. I just don't have that list on hand at the moment. Sorry to not have exactly the right tools to offer you right now, but I can help you later if you like.



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Carmen's case is another example of a parish priest either stalling the process or gving out unhelpful information.. I had the same situation with my own parish priest when my parish was brand new and we had a priest that had only worked directly in the Arch Indy offices.. He was a dear sweet man and had many good qualities but he knew nothing of annulments.. After his time with us ended we got a priest who is a Tribunal judge. When I talked to him about proceeding he went wide eyed when I told him what the previous pastor had said.. I always tell people to go directly to their Tribunal in these instances. No one should ever tell you to wait til a marriage is imminent.

Apr 6th 2013 new

(Quote) Jerry-928087 said: Donna, the Wichita Diocese requires one full calendar year pass between the civil divorc...
(Quote) Jerry-928087 said:

Donna, the Wichita Diocese requires one full calendar year pass between the civil divorce and consideration for annulment. They claim to be making certain there is no reconcilliation.

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And what's their reasoning if the ex-spouse gets married again right away? Mine was married within 4 mos of the divorce.. I didn't apply for an annulment for over 20 years, but that's my own procrstination issue..I always knew I had solid grounds.

Apr 6th 2013 new

(Quote) Meg-920823 said: In retrospect, I would have started writing the stories of his life, my life and our life even before I re...
(Quote) Meg-920823 said: In retrospect, I would have started writing the stories of his life, my life and our life even before I requested the annulment application papers. It was much more of a project than I ever imagined and took several months and many, many, many hours. This writing process was so important but I didn't realize that until I started. Seeing the big picture by putting all the pieces in some semblance of order was truly healing and helped me look forward.

May Our Lord and His Mother be with you...
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I have facilitated the Divorce & Beyond program for the Archdiocese of Indianapolis & part of the "homework" is to begin writing the stories. It truly is helpful when you finally do begin the annulment process. It also helps if you have ever journaled--bring out those books & notes! Anything to help jog your memory because those questions are numerous & it helps to have as many supporting details as possible.

Apr 8th 2013 new

I waited a year by choice (to get myself and my kids settled) and then received my decree within 9-months. it was a wonderful experience and a chance to grow and learn - and hopefully not repeat the same mistakes in the selection of my next spouse (if I have one :)

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