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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Apr 11th 2013 new
I think all normal people would agree that Mike's girl is a piece of work.
Apr 11th 2013 new

Nice people don't give ultimatums...except in matters of life/health, such as: Drugs or the family, you choose.

Apr 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Mike-646924 said: Hello Everybody: Ok What wpuld you do If? Lets say your in a Nice (beautiful) Relationship (oh say...
(Quote) Mike-646924 said:

Hello Everybody: Ok What wpuld you do If? Lets say your in a Nice (beautiful) Relationship (oh say 6 months or more) And everything is goin just Dandy; (everything is clicking) Then all of a sudden! Lets say he has a Dog (lovess the Dog) and she does too; oh yeah his kids are all grown; But its just him and the Dog; And durin a conversation she says (to him) you know "i love your dog" But however i'am not quite comfortable with the dog; (around) so he say's what are you saying? She say's to him "its either ME or the DOG"? What would you do; Ok my answer would be to her is: Ok Let me think about this; let me sleep on it and we will talk about it tomorrow; then the next day; She asks the same question? Well what did you decide? its either ME or the DOG? I would say you know what? (sorry) But i choose the dog! So how aboutit? What would you do/ choose? (think about it)!! Mike "Peace"!!

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I can't entirely relate to this situation as I assume based on the facts you gave that this man has already been married before. Personally a human has more value than any animal no matter how beloved, so in my book 10/10 times I'm going to say her and without having to think about it. She has a soul and can relate to me and be a much better companion than ANY dog ever.

Apr 11th 2013 new
(Quote) John-324285 said: I can't entirely relate to this situation as I assume based on the facts you gave that this man has ...
(Quote) John-324285 said:



I can't entirely relate to this situation as I assume based on the facts you gave that this man has already been married before. Personally a human has more value than any animal no matter how beloved, so in my book 10/10 times I'm going to say her and without having to think about it. She has a soul and can relate to me and be a much better companion than ANY dog ever.

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If there are any deceitful, demanding women out there John will date you. Lol.
Apr 11th 2013 new
(Quote) Frank-410833 said: If there are any deceitful, demanding women out there John will date you. Lol.
(Quote) Frank-410833 said:

If there are any deceitful, demanding women out there John will date you. Lol.
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This just goes to show you what some people will put up with. It also goes to show you how much respect they have for themselves.
Apr 11th 2013 new

That's a really tough scenario. If anyone had a problem with pets due to allergies, not wanting to have a pet in the future would make things tough. But bringing up that subject 6 months into the relationship raises some red flags.

Asking for an ultimatum in one day's time over a beloved pet does come off as the hints of a controlling nature, but the fact that she asked may give you an idea to where her mind was headed. She may have been thinking "You know, this guy is great, but I'm not a dog person. I wonder if he'd give up the dog so the two of us could be totally happy." However, the way she went around finding this out was, needless to say, not the best. The subject could have been brought about gently in a regular conversation. You can't just drop something like that in their lap.

Now, people are more important than anything in this earthly life, and if the woman had reason - say the dog is an uncontrolled mess - then she could definitely have talked about it. But since we don't know her feelings and the way the dog behaved around her, I can't say for sure whether or not she was justified. I just know that such behavior would definitely put me on alert about that person, and make me wonder what other demands would come up in the future.

My advice is to ask if you could live with yourself if you gave up this beloved pet; would you be able to have the same feelings toward this woman for giving you that ultimatum? And finally, if she exhibits more of that behavior in the future, is she someone you could see yourself spending a long, grace-filled, happy Catholic life with her? If not, then it would be time to bow out gracefully, thank her for a beautiful 6 months, and tell her that given the circumstances, you don't think you're compatible.

A man who offers no insult to the lady, whether or not he thinks she was at fault is a true gentleman and soldier of Christ, and his actions will be rewarded in the future. We need more gents like that in this world. wink

Apr 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Mike-646924 said: Hello Everybody: Ok What wpuld you do If? Lets say your in a Nice (beautiful) Relationship (oh say...
(Quote) Mike-646924 said:

Hello Everybody: Ok What wpuld you do If? Lets say your in a Nice (beautiful) Relationship (oh say 6 months or more) And everything is goin just Dandy; (everything is clicking) Then all of a sudden! Lets say he has a Dog (lovess the Dog) and she does too; oh yeah his kids are all grown; But its just him and the Dog; And durin a conversation she says (to him) you know "i love your dog" But however i'am not quite comfortable with the dog; (around) so he say's what are you saying? She say's to him "its either ME or the DOG"? What would you do; Ok my answer would be to her is: Ok Let me think about this; let me sleep on it and we will talk about it tomorrow; then the next day; She asks the same question? Well what did you decide? its either ME or the DOG? I would say you know what? (sorry) But i choose the dog! So how aboutit? What would you do/ choose? (think about it)!! Mike "Peace"!!

--hide--
Mike -- I posted comments to Pat's list.

One thing I would ask is if you are paying more attention to the dog than you are to your lady friend? Doubt that is the case, but it does happen. Also, is your dog a Rottweiler, pit bull, or German Shepherd or one who snarls and growls when she's around? Dogs that are regarded as inherently viscious can be scary. Or....it could be that your dog is a keen judge of character and is trying to tell you something.

She's put you in an awkward spot, and it sounds as if she isn't willing to sit down and see what compromises can be made. You might be seeing a red flag over this.

Hopefully you two can work this out. The dog might be traumatized if it goes to a different home -- another thing to consider.

Apr 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Roystan-340472 said: He should stay with the dog. It's rare that a woman will chase off some kid punk who's ...
(Quote) Roystan-340472 said:

He should stay with the dog. It's rare that a woman will chase off some kid punk who's broken into the house to steal beer by biting him in the leg. And even if she did, she wouldn't be able to summon up much of a bite force anyway.

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Good point, Roystan!! When local police give crime prevention lectures, they frequently mention the best type of alarm system available -- a barking dog.

Maybe Mike can persuade his lady friend that having a dog is for her protection.

Apr 11th 2013 new
If not, then it would be time to bow out gracefully, thank her for a beautiful 6 months, and tell her that given the circumstances, you don't think you're compatible.



A man who offers no insult to the lady, whether or not he thinks she was at fault is a true gentleman and soldier of Christ, and his actions will be rewarded in the future. We need more gents like that in this world.

[/quote]

I'm sorry, bow out gracefully and THANK her for a beautiful 6 months which were obviously not genuine to begin with after she just wasted his time? laughing rolling eyes eyepopping WOW.
Apr 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: Nice people don't give ultimatums...except in matters of life/health, such as: Drugs or the f...
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

Nice people don't give ultimatums...except in matters of life/health, such as: Drugs or the family, you choose.

--hide--
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