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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people 45+. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is told in chapters 11-25 of the book of Genesis.
Learn More:Abraham & Sarah

Unmarried at your age!

Apr 14th 2013 new

I'm sure this topic has been covered in the past but I don't check out the forums very often so I'm going to bring it up again. For the last 10 years I've heard countless comments from people I work with and even some people from Church about my single status. They range from astonishment to suspicion. The most common thing people say to me is "your too picky!". The "picky" part is that I'm looking for a man who is a practicing Catholic who accepts all the the teachings of the Catholic Church. One guy at work even implied he thought I was gay! My older single sisters have experienced similar treatment. I've noticed that if your single but have been married than opinions are less harsh; they seem to get a "pass". This week I walked past a guy I work with as he was talking to a young gal about "fixing" her up. He stopped and said that I was single too. As usual she assumed I was divorced and looked shocked when I said I was never married. He jumped in with the "she's too picky" comment.

I know I shouldn't care what others think about me but I'm only human and really am starting to feel like others perceive me as some kind of social reject. Do guys get this kind of attitude too?

Apr 14th 2013 new

I have also never been married but have not picked many of these types of comments, but if someone says that I am too picky I usually agree. The truth is that it is very difficult to find someone that is a practicing Catholic that is also compatible and local.

Apr 14th 2013 new
(Quote) Louise-877216 said: I'm sure this topic has been covered in the past but I don't check out the forums very often so I...
(Quote) Louise-877216 said:

I'm sure this topic has been covered in the past but I don't check out the forums very often so I'm going to bring it up again. For the last 10 years I've heard countless comments from people I work with and even some people from Church about my single status. They range from astonishment to suspicion. The most common thing people say to me is "your too picky!". The "picky" part is that I'm looking for a man who is a practicing Catholic who accepts all the the teachings of the Catholic Church. One guy at work even implied he thought I was gay! My older single sisters have experienced similar treatment. I've noticed that if your single but have been married than opinions are less harsh; they seem to get a "pass". This week I walked past a guy I work with as he was talking to a young gal about "fixing" her up. He stopped and said that I was single too. As usual she assumed I was divorced and looked shocked when I said I was never married. He jumped in with the "she's too picky" comment.

I know I shouldn't care what others think about me but I'm only human and really am starting to feel like others perceive me as some kind of social reject. Do guys get this kind of attitude too?

--hide--


Wear your cross at all times, and you might get a different reception from others.
Apr 14th 2013 new

God's timing, I will work on happiness within in the meantime.

Apr 15th 2013 new

I have had a busy but full life so far. Return to school at 28, got AA, BA, Credential and taught many years in preschools. I beleive in following the will of God and so now I search for a mate. I have a great job, settled in Los Angeles, CA and now I am searching for the one that God has for me.

Apr 15th 2013 new

My never married younger sister, who is 44, gets this comment ALL of the time. She owns her own home, is very attractive, well educated and makes a very good living. I have come to the conclusion that most men are afraid of her, because she is just too "perfect", and she won't let them control her. She definitely knows what she wants and will get it (which is why she has been so successful in her career). Men tend to seek out the insecure young women who don't have the ability to take care of themselves.
Another point that I have noticed is being over 5' 6" is not good for a woman; most men prefer the tiny delicate, petite, women who need someone to hold their purse, ect.


Sorry I couldn't be of much help to you but being a never married woman over 40 is definitely difficult; don't compromise. God is faithful.

Apr 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Louise-877216 said: I'm sure this topic has been covered in the past but I don't check out the forums very o...
(Quote) Louise-877216 said:

I'm sure this topic has been covered in the past but I don't check out the forums very often so I'm going to bring it up again. For the last 10 years I've heard countless comments from people I work with and even some people from Church about my single status. They range from astonishment to suspicion. The most common thing people say to me is "your too picky!". The "picky" part is that I'm looking for a man who is a practicing Catholic who accepts all the the teachings of the Catholic Church. One guy at work even implied he thought I was gay! My older single sisters have experienced similar treatment. I've noticed that if your single but have been married than opinions are less harsh; they seem to get a "pass". This week I walked past a guy I work with as he was talking to a young gal about "fixing" her up. He stopped and said that I was single too. As usual she assumed I was divorced and looked shocked when I said I was never married. He jumped in with the "she's too picky" comment.

I know I shouldn't care what others think about me but I'm only human and really am starting to feel like others perceive me as some kind of social reject. Do guys get this kind of attitude too?

--hide--


Welcome, fellow Canuck!
I'm in the category myself. I've never given up on the thiought of marriage. I'm not holding my breath till it happens. I am participating in life as fully as I can each day.
Life is a dance...when the music starts playing, I want to be up on the dance floor.
wave Canada

Apr 15th 2013 new

Thanks for the feedback. I too lead a full life with a challenging job but I still feel like I'm missing something very important; marriage. I've always felt called to it and even though I feel frustrated, I've never given up hope....for some reason, I just can't stop hoping and praying. I guess I just don't want to feel like people who don't understand are judging me. Anyone have some good comeback comments that won't sound defensive?

Apr 15th 2013 new

Well if its any consolation, I get the: " why haven't you re-married?, you're so young..." I think they don't realize that I am 46 and I don't feel "that young" anymore like when I got divorced at 34. Of Course it is mostly the secular world that doesn't understand marriage is a sacrament that is spiritually binding. So the understanding of anullment just falls on deaf ears.

And then on the other end of the stick, when I am finally annulled, and have been able to come up for breath after raising 4 kids on my own, I am written off by 7/7 because I've already been married and have children. Well so much for taking my vocation seriously.

Bottom line. It is all about doing God's will. And if our final goal is heaven, then the only way to get there is by doing his will - with a travelling companion or not. C'est la vie, madames et monsiers. or Asi es la vida!



Apr 15th 2013 new

I LOVE this topic! My favorite response: "No, I only have torrid affairs"


Honestly......You are right.......Me? Yeah I know....on first dates/communication.....eventually it gets asked; "So you've never been married?" "why have you never been married".......Me: If I knew trust me I'd fix it. And it is SOoooo very easy to get into that funk, those thoughts that creep in.. esp after a break up(for me several months ago)...what is wrong w/ me? What am I doing wrong? Why didn't I see this(the reason it didn't work out).


Anyways....Yeah...i do find myself esp when w/ some friends saying dumb stuff like...Oh can i borrow your husband...and always making sure my shoes don't look too comfortable...yep that is a bit neurotic! anyhoo keep the faith girlfriend!

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