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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Apr 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Carol-737878 said: Joan, it sounds as if you & I had similar experiences with husbands who after so...
(Quote) Carol-737878 said:


Joan, it sounds as if you & I had similar experiences with husbands who after some time just turned away from being the men of faith they were. It's just so hard to tell how a relationship will progress. I look wistfully at those couples who have been married a number of years & seem to still be in love with each other, those who are sitting next to each other in the pew during Mass. I want to know their secret is to staying faithful to each other & to their faith! Realistically, all relationships can be so different depending on life circumstances & on the individuals themselves. Keep praying for each other & with each other on a daily basis could be the secret or at least part of it. It's certainly something to ponder because we cannot see down that road.

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What I have come to find out is that the couple who "seem to still be in love with each other and sitting next to each other in the pew during Mass" struggle just as much as everybody else, married or divorced. The difference is how they respond to a difficult situation. My former spouse definitely hit the "midlife crisis" hard when he turned 40 (bought Harley, joined Harley gang, ect.). THere is absolutely nothing that I did or said that would change any of his choices. I moved forward in my life, spending the time that we would normally spend together in prayer. I also continued my education to increase my take home pay, in anticipation of having to support myself and possibly the kids. The additional prayer time allowed for me to reflect on God as my "husband", protecting me from evil and taking care of my needs. Fortunately God is always faithful and was able to give me the strength and intuition to do what was best for me and our kids. According to scripture it is better to remove yourself from an unfaithful non-believer than it is to stay in their presence, which is the choice I made.


The shared faith journey is a GIFT to those who are faithful. If one partner strays, the other one is called to continue on without them and not be pulled into the distruction of the nonbeliever. We are on this faith journey with GOD as our partner; he is always faithful, always present and will never do us harm.

Apr 20th 2013 new

(Quote) Joan-529855 said: What I have come to find out is that the couple who "seem to still be in love wi...
(Quote) Joan-529855 said:


What I have come to find out is that the couple who "seem to still be in love with each other and sitting next to each other in the pew during Mass" struggle just as much as everybody else, married or divorced. The difference is how they respond to a difficult situation. My former spouse definitely hit the "midlife crisis" hard when he turned 40 (bought Harley, joined Harley gang, ect.). THere is absolutely nothing that I did or said that would change any of his choices. I moved forward in my life, spending the time that we would normally spend together in prayer. I also continued my education to increase my take home pay, in anticipation of having to support myself and possibly the kids. The additional prayer time allowed for me to reflect on God as my "husband", protecting me from evil and taking care of my needs. Fortunately God is always faithful and was able to give me the strength and intuition to do what was best for me and our kids. According to scripture it is better to remove yourself from an unfaithful non-believer than it is to stay in their presence, which is the choice I made.


The shared faith journey is a GIFT to those who are faithful. If one partner strays, the other one is called to continue on without them and not be pulled into the distruction of the nonbeliever. We are on this faith journey with GOD as our partner; he is always faithful, always present and will never do us harm.

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Joan i am with you....on several of your posts. My ex and I were both "cradle" Catholics and started our Faith journey together. (funny how close we were then....building this kind of foundation) We raised our boys Catholic...and, as a family...we went to Church. Later as communication withered she stopped going. I couldn't beg her to come to Mass with me...with her citing a litany of excuses. In fact, the last 8 years of the marriage I went alone. You were right earlier when you alluded to "people/spouses changing" We must remain vigilant...and not take a marriage for granted. I think a marriage takes a 100/100 committment...just as my Father said. (think it's in my profile)

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