Faith Focused Dating. Create your Free Profile and meet your Match! Sign Up for Free
A place to learn, mingle, and share

This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Feeling the lonliness?

Apr 21st 2013 new

Hello fellow divorced or annulled brothers and sisters. I went to a special event at our parish tonight - praise and worship, speaker, adoration. I was reminded how lonely it can be to have a wonderful spiritual encounter with the Lord, but yet not to be able to reach out and hold hands with a special someone who also shares that encounter. I find myself sad when I see happy couples together in mass, or parents with children at mass who have the luxury of being able to tag-team it with the cranky ones. Balancing housework, homework, car repair, job stress, school meetings, etc. is just NOT meant to be done alone.

Looking for tips to battle the lonely times and stay hopeful in God's plan for us. God bless you! hug

Apr 21st 2013 new
(Quote) Caroline-930073 said: Hello fellow divorced or annulled brothers and sisters. I went to a special event at our parish tonight - p...
(Quote) Caroline-930073 said:

Hello fellow divorced or annulled brothers and sisters. I went to a special event at our parish tonight - praise and worship, speaker, adoration. I was reminded how lonely it can be to have a wonderful spiritual encounter with the Lord, but yet not to be able to reach out and hold hands with a special someone who also shares that encounter. I find myself sad when I see happy couples together in mass, or parents with children at mass who have the luxury of being able to tag-team it with the cranky ones. Balancing housework, homework, car repair, job stress, school meetings, etc. is just NOT meant to be done alone.



Looking for tips to battle the lonely times and stay hopeful in God's plan for us. God bless you!

--hide--


I so know the feeling, Caroline. I have all sorts of phrases that I run through my mind: Jesus, Mary and Joseph, I love you, please save souls; Jesus, I offer this up but please help me...it hurts a lot; this too shall pass; remember your gratitude list, Meg. You have so much to be grateful for....These are the things I think and then I give myself permission to feel my pain and in a few hours or a few days, I feel better. I don't know that there is any escaping it in a healthy way; I have fully realized that pain is a part of life, whatever the pain is and it comes and goes, along with joy and the good times and good feelings...Perhaps this sounds glib but for me, it has just been to roll with it and accept the feelings. I believe I am meant for married life and this is painful to be alone...so be it. It is what it is until and if God decides differently. Meanwhile I have to cheerfully hang on.
Apr 21st 2013 new

Thoughts:

When I think of dealing with feelings of sadness, it is helpful for me to remember they are a natural reaction to loss of some kind, whether it be security, companionship, personal well being, or whatever. In any case, it is also helpful for me to remember that at that time it may be important to consider the need for growth on a deeper level than where I have been before, and to discover how to find and embrace contentment with life as it is, not how I would wish it to be. I am also reminded that even if I could be in a different state of life, e.g., married, that does not mean it will be without tears or challenge associated with other losses.

By spending time cultivating thoughts, leading to feelings of acceptance and appreciation for what is and my current state of life, then anxiousness subsides, and the mind and heart open to creative living in the here and now.

"But I have cried to God: and the Lord will save me" (Psalm 54:17).

There is a beautiful video you might enjoy: Eucharistic Adoration at Catholic Underground. God bless.

Apr 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Caroline-930073 said: Hello fellow divorced or annulled brothers and sisters. I went to a special event at our paris...
(Quote) Caroline-930073 said:

Hello fellow divorced or annulled brothers and sisters. I went to a special event at our parish tonight - praise and worship, speaker, adoration. I was reminded how lonely it can be to have a wonderful spiritual encounter with the Lord, but yet not to be able to reach out and hold hands with a special someone who also shares that encounter. I find myself sad when I see happy couples together in mass, or parents with children at mass who have the luxury of being able to tag-team it with the cranky ones. Balancing housework, homework, car repair, job stress, school meetings, etc. is just NOT meant to be done alone.

Looking for tips to battle the lonely times and stay hopeful in God's plan for us. God bless you!

--hide--

Caroline,

After posting a response to the blog on contraception a moment ago, and considering your note here and others I've read on this site recently, I must ask... WHAT IS *WRONG* WITH THE CATHOLIC CHURCH?

I joined the Church almost 18 months ago, and attended regularly for a year before that. Since I have begun my affiliation with the Church, I have come to realize that if you're not married, you're forgotten. There is ONE parish in the Tampa area with an active Young Adults group. There must be countless Catholic singles in the area who wish to meet and marry someone who shares our faith, but I'm not seeing too many of them here and certainly am not finding them at my parish or others I visit.

Due to rotating shift work, I am unable to lead such a group or attend regularly.

I have been alone for over a year now after moving to Tampa. The parish I attend has provided little consolation as I've fought career loss, isolation from my children (who live in a different state) due to inability find child care (rotating shift worker...), and trying to get a social life of sorts started. I've been invited to a local Baptist church (was Bapist before becoming Catholic last year) and grow very uneasy with the thought taking the person up on his invitation. Still, it seems as though I'll be wasting my time trying to find a spouse within the Catholic church.

Not sure what help I can offer other than to say there are many of us who lack a supporter--be it a spouse, significant other, etc., and must do everything alone. It is not okay that the Church has so little that helps those of us who are unmarried build community with others in our situation within the church. Social isolation is a very real problem for many people today.


Praying for you,

Michael

Apr 22nd 2013 new

I don't have any tips, but just wanted to give you a hug & let you know you are not alone.

Apr 22nd 2013 new
(Quote) Michael-780154 said: Caroline, After posting a response to the blog on contraception a moment ago, ...
(Quote) Michael-780154 said:



Caroline,



After posting a response to the blog on contraception a moment ago, and considering your note here and others I've read on this site recently, I must ask... WHAT IS *WRONG* WITH THE CATHOLIC CHURCH?



I joined the Church almost 18 months ago, and attended regularly for a year before that. Since I have begun my affiliation with the Church, I have come to realize that if you're not married, you're forgotten. There is ONE parish in the Tampa area with an active Young Adults group. There must be countless Catholic singles in the area who wish to meet and marry someone who shares our faith, but I'm not seeing too many of them here and certainly am not finding them at my parish or others I visit.



Due to rotating shift work, I am unable to lead such a group or attend regularly.



I have been alone for over a year now after moving to Tampa. The parish I attend has provided little consolation as I've fought career loss, isolation from my children (who live in a different state) due to inability find child care (rotating shift worker...), and trying to get a social life of sorts started. I've been invited to a local Baptist church (was Bapist before becoming Catholic last year) and grow very uneasy with the thought taking the person up on his invitation. Still, it seems as though I'll be wasting my time trying to find a spouse within the Catholic church.



Not sure what help I can offer other than to say there are many of us who lack a supporter--be it a spouse, significant other, etc., and must do everything alone. It is not okay that the Church has so little that helps those of us who are unmarried build community with others in our situation within the church. Social isolation is a very real problem for many people today.




Praying for you,



Michael

--hide--


Michael, do they have 'Meet Up" groups in our area? I think it is national. You could meet a lot of people based on the type of Meet UP group you join..they won't all be Catholic by any means but who knows what will happen?

rosary
Apr 22nd 2013 new
Obviously I am still in the very beginnings of the divorce process, but the best advice I have is just getting out there. No I don't have someone when I am home and just want to talk, and I don't have a lot of moments where you just want a spouse, BUT I have built stronger more incredible friendships. People who I can rely on for anything and everything. I'm meeting new people by going to support groups and just expanding my networks and support. It isn't easy, but I have learned that I can be okay without my spouse. Would I rather us be together? Yes, but it isn't that way, so I have to learn new ways to beat the loneliness. (((Hugs)))
Apr 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Meg-920823 said: Michael, do they have 'Meet Up" groups in our area? I think it is national. You could mee...
(Quote) Meg-920823 said:

Michael, do they have 'Meet Up" groups in our area? I think it is national. You could meet a lot of people based on the type of Meet UP group you join..they won't all be Catholic by any means but who knows what will happen?

--hide--

Meg, thank you for your reply. I am checking out Meetup groups... though rotating shift schedule frequently precludes attendance. This is a major frustration, but is out of my control. Still, I'm pursuing the options I can...

Apr 22nd 2013 new
(Quote) Michael-780154 said: Meg, thank you for your reply. I am checking out Meetup groups... though ro...
(Quote) Michael-780154 said:





Meg, thank you for your reply. I am checking out Meetup groups... though rotating shift schedule frequently precludes attendance. This is a major frustration, but is out of my control. Still, I'm pursuing the options I can...

--hide--


MIchael, I can't believe how many there are...every interest under the sun...or one can start one. Maybe you could start one for those with your schedule....Seriously,,,,one never knows.
Apr 22nd 2013 new
(Quote) Ashley-954445 said: Obviously I am still in the very beginnings of the divorce process, but the best advice I have is just getting ou...
(Quote) Ashley-954445 said: Obviously I am still in the very beginnings of the divorce process, but the best advice I have is just getting out there. No I don't have someone when I am home and just want to talk, and I don't have a lot of moments where you just want a spouse, BUT I have built stronger more incredible friendships. People who I can rely on for anything and everything. I'm meeting new people by going to support groups and just expanding my networks and support. It isn't easy, but I have learned that I can be okay without my spouse. Would I rather us be together? Yes, but it isn't that way, so I have to learn new ways to beat the loneliness. (((Hugs)))
--hide--


It's weird. I generally enjoy doing things by myself unless I think about the potential of having a loved one with me....Guess I shouldn't think about it, huh?

laughing When and if God is ready, it will be changed for all of us as long as we do our part.
Posts 1 - 10 of 52