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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

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I have read some posts by some of my fellow singles that they feel like they are lesser than those catholic who are married or are in religious life. Although I can understand those feelings (as I have had them myself from time to time), I don't believe that is the case. Yes, it can be tough at times to be a catholic single adult, and it does seem to get tougher the older you get.


Yet, I can't say I have felt less welcome in the church being single. I would say the church is probably more welcoming and understanding of singles than society as a whole.


I wonder what others think....

Apr 29th 2013 new

(Quote) Patrick-341178 said: I have read some posts by some of my fellow singles that they feel like they are lesser than th...
(Quote) Patrick-341178 said:

I have read some posts by some of my fellow singles that they feel like they are lesser than those catholic who are married or are in religious life. Although I can understand those feelings (as I have had them myself from time to time), I don't believe that is the case. Yes, it can be tough at times to be a catholic single adult, and it does seem to get tougher the older you get.


Yet, I can't say I have felt less welcome in the church being single. I would say the church is probably more welcoming and understanding of singles than society as a whole.


I wonder what others think....

--hide--



The church treats Catholic male singles differently than Catholic female singles.... there is a little start to the question....

Apr 29th 2013 new

(Quote) Patrick-341178 said: I have read some posts by some of my fellow singles that they feel like they are lesser than th...
(Quote) Patrick-341178 said:

I have read some posts by some of my fellow singles that they feel like they are lesser than those catholic who are married or are in religious life. Although I can understand those feelings (as I have had them myself from time to time), I don't believe that is the case. Yes, it can be tough at times to be a catholic single adult, and it does seem to get tougher the older you get.


Yet, I can't say I have felt less welcome in the church being single. I would say the church is probably more welcoming and understanding of singles than society as a whole.


I wonder what others think....

--hide--
Many parishes are limited in what they can offer to different categories of its members. It seems the emphasis is on the mainstream membership -- adult, married Catholics, who I assume constitute the majority of Church membership. There are so many other groups that don't always appear to get as much attention -- the elderly; sick/homebound; unemployed; divorced/separated; adult singles; and young people. Fortunately a number of parishes have some programs to include the aforementioned categories. The Church certainly doesn't intend to neglect any particular person or group of persons, but each parish is limited as far as personnel and resources are concerned.

In general though, there is a welcoming atmosphere in most Churches and all are treated equally in that sense.

A suggestion to those who feel a particular group is being ignored -- volunteer to start a program. That doesn't necessarily involve running it -- just assembling a particular group to see if there is enough interest, then to find a leader for that group. Our own parish offers several programs and activities for youthful Catholics; we have visits (including Communion) to the hospitalized and homebound -- also phone calls to those on a sick-list; a bereavement program, and sessions for divorced/separated Catholics. Not all of them are full-time, year-round programs but they are helpful to those who find themselves in a particular situation described above.

Some homilies are geared toward certain groups, or at least include them as a form of recognition, and acknowledgement of their existence and appreciation of their unique sets of problems.

Some Church organizations are open to all, no matter what their age or marital status might be. Volunteering is a good way to receive added blessings and benefits, although that isn't the primary goal of participating.

Apr 29th 2013 new

(Quote) Ray-566531 said: (Quote) Patrick-341178 said: I have read some posts by some of my fellow sin...
(Quote) Ray-566531 said:

Quote:
Patrick-341178 said:

I have read some posts by some of my fellow singles that they feel like they are lesser than those catholic who are married or are in religious life. Although I can understand those feelings (as I have had them myself from time to time), I don't believe that is the case. Yes, it can be tough at times to be a catholic single adult, and it does seem to get tougher the older you get.


Yet, I can't say I have felt less welcome in the church being single. I would say the church is probably more welcoming and understanding of singles than society as a whole.


I wonder what others think....


Many parishes are limited in what they can offer to different categories of its members. It seems the emphasis is on the mainstream membership -- adult, married Catholics, who I assume constitute the majority of Church membership. There are so many other groups that don't always appear to get as much attention -- the elderly; sick/homebound; unemployed; divorced/separated; adult singles; and young people. Fortunately a number of parishes have some programs to include the aforementioned categories. The Church certainly doesn't intend to neglect any particular person or group of persons, but each parish is limited as far as personnel and resources are concerned.

In general though, there is a welcoming atmosphere in most Churches and all are treated equally in that sense.

A suggestion to those who feel a particular group is being ignored -- volunteer to start a program. That doesn't necessarily involve running it -- just assembling a particular group to see if there is enough interest, then to find a leader for that group. Our own parish offers several programs and activities for youthful Catholics; we have visits (including Communion) to the hospitalized and homebound -- also phone calls to those on a sick-list; a bereavement program, and sessions for divorced/separated Catholics. Not all of them are full-time, year-round programs but they are helpful to those who find themselves in a particular situation described above.

Some homilies are geared toward certain groups, or at least include them as a form of recognition, and acknowledgement of their existence and appreciation of their unique sets of problems.

Some Church organizations are open to all, no matter what their age or marital status might be. Volunteering is a good way to receive added blessings and benefits, although that isn't the primary goal of participating.

--hide--


Parishes probably need us to take a stronger role in ministry to just about anyone... in need..

Apr 29th 2013 new

I dislike the Church being treated as some kind of dating agency. Yes, in days gone by singles would meet other singles through friends and family and end up marrying. I don't think the Church should be doing more to set up singles, what I think it should be doing is teaching the Truth of the Church and how to apply that to single living.

It is not enough to organise a "singles' night" if it just ends up being no better than some random secular event; that should not be the purpose of the Church proper.

I also think that a lot of people whinge too much about what the Church isnt' doing for them as an individual. They should whinge about what the Church is not doing for society. People need to stop being so self-centred. Nothing stopping a single person having a chat with other people after Mass on a Sunday. Or organising something themselves and using the Parish newsletter to promote.

There are catholics in real life and on this site who think fornication, contraception, abortion, redefinning marriage to accomodate same sex couples and co-habitation are okay. Let's start with teh Church addressing those issues instead of facilitating events that brings these people together.

Apr 29th 2013 new

(Quote) Marian-83994 said: Parishes probably need us to take a stronger role in ministry to just about anyone... in ...
(Quote) Marian-83994 said:



Parishes probably need us to take a stronger role in ministry to just about anyone... in need..

--hide--



I was addressing what we need to do for society in my post above. I wonder if due to the "coming persecution" if we will have to take a stronger more protective, proactive and helpful role toward others.

Apr 29th 2013 new

Hi Patrick,

I do feel that soceity has many unecessary labels and stereotypes. As Catholics we are set apart and we need not fall into the demands of people because we are guided by the church.

We know our worth because we are sons and daughters of God and we have this previlege regardless of marital status, social and economic background as we know the bible tells us nothing can separate us from Christ Jesus.

I know personally groups of people who think that it is better for you to be in a relationship than to be single, even if it means being without someone who is married, of the same sex or even who someone who does not know his or her partner's worth. That is their opinion - just that and nothing more.


Singlehood is a calling and if someone is called to this, he or she should live this life in submission to God's will just as in other vocations.

Apr 29th 2013 new

(Quote) Naomi-698107 There are catholics in real life and on this site who think fornication, ...
(Quote) Naomi-698107


There are catholics in real life and on this site who think fornication, contraception, abortion, redefining marriage to accomodate same sex couples and co-habitation are okay. Let's start with the Church addressing those issues instead of facilitating events that brings these people together.

--hide--

I know at least one Catholic like the above. She no longer attends Church regularly, is on anti-depressants, and seems at least semi-miserable. Her son cohabitated before marriage, got his wife-to-be pregnant, but did marry her, and they act like everything is lovey-dovey. Then the CM blog spoke of married mens' sexual activity that excludes the wife. I know a now-divorced woman whose ex-husband preferred porn on his computer instead of her. She told him it was either her or the computer. He left w/ his computer.

I thought I knew a devout Catholic but then she started talking that fornication and cohabitation are OK.

I wonder about many of the Local people I know. I seems like they are continuing to join the sexual revolution. Had a long conversation w/ an early 20s woman at my Apt Complex on Saturday who cohabitates. The cynic in me wonders how long it will be before, as an ex-CM woman told me, her BF throws her to the ground like a papercup and steps on it.

Apr 29th 2013 new

(Quote) Naomi-698107 said: I dislike the Church being treated as some kind of dating agency. Yes, in days gone by singles wo...
(Quote) Naomi-698107 said:

I dislike the Church being treated as some kind of dating agency. Yes, in days gone by singles would meet other singles through friends and family and end up marrying. I don't think the Church should be doing more to set up singles, what I think it should be doing is teaching the Truth of the Church and how to apply that to single living.

It is not enough to organise a "singles' night" if it just ends up being no better than some random secular event; that should not be the purpose of the Church proper.

I also think that a lot of people whinge too much about what the Church isnt' doing for them as an individual. They should whinge about what the Church is not doing for society. People need to stop being so self-centred. Nothing stopping a single person having a chat with other people after Mass on a Sunday. Or organising something themselves and using the Parish newsletter to promote.

There are catholics in real life and on this site who think fornication, contraception, abortion, redefinning marriage to accomodate same sex couples and co-habitation are okay. Let's start with teh Church addressing those issues instead of facilitating events that brings these people together.

--hide--
I'm not sure that setting up the Church as a dating service was intended in Patrick's post, but, yes, it's not intended to be that.

Some of the main goals of the Church are to present the "Good News", offer the Sacraments, and others.

There are groups of people who have "special needs" (if you'll pardon the expression). What we're talking about here, fir example, are young people -- young adults. There are groups set up that present a well-rounded program as well as various activities that offer spiritual and social events. There is much to be gained on the spiritual side -- open conversations about the importance of chastity, for example. Such groups are intended to bring people together and be spiritually productive -- going into the world to love and serve the Lord. This, of course, includes being of service to society.

Groups for the even younger Church members can be set up to provide catechetical sessions -- learning more about the Faith and how to carry this knowledg into the real world.

Those who are sick and homebound often lose their connection with their parish they served (some of these were "founders" of their parishes). The shortage of priests makes visits to all of these people impractical at least -- impossible at most. It's an opportunity for lay people to minister to these special people who have needs that the mainstream doesn't have. That includes home visits, having an EME bring Communion, phone calls to check on their well-being, and so on.

There are other categories, as well. Ministering to others as a group can encourage them to continue in their individual roles. Even those who are infirm and can no longer can attend Mass can be encouraged to do spiritual reading; spiritual reflecting, and, very importantly -- offer their prayers. Their own suffering can be offered up -- both for themselves and for others.

The possibilities are endless......

Apr 29th 2013 new

(Quote) Marian-83994 said: The church treats Catholic male singles differently than Catholic female singles....
(Quote) Marian-83994 said:


The church treats Catholic male singles differently than Catholic female singles....

--hide--

How does the church (as distinct from members of the church) treat males singles different than female singles?

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