Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.
Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael
But you asked a good question: How does one get a response from someone else on this site? I'll give an honest answer, not sugar coated, about getting women to communicate with you.
1. Create an online presence that establishes you are open and safe to communicate with. Many women are very hesitant to "cold" communicate with a man. If women can see a bit more of who you are and how you deal with people, then they will likely feel more assured that you are (or are not) a gentleman. How do you do this? Post in the forums, be in the chat rooms. Pray in the prayer room. Attend events. Get to know the men and women in the community, not just the isolated women you are interested in. Completely fill out your profile. Post several pictures of you with variety.
2. Write properly. In the online media this is critical. Words, spelling, punctuation, and grammar convey a lot to the reader. It might not seem fair, but it is true. We make a lot of conclusions based on what we read, second only to the photos we see. Disjointed and improper writing conveys (right or wrong)aprs on who is such. Women (probably men, too) will fear and avoid that.
3. Pursue but don't hunt. I know-- subtle difference, but this is important for many women. Women want to feel treasured and desired, but not like a piece of meat. Take your time to get to know her and appreciate the all of her, not just her pretty face or beautiful body. Sometimes when men "hunt" the women feel objectified, and that is a major turn off! It makes many of us feel threatened.
4. Be patient. Be open. God's timing and plan is perfect!
5. Pray. Put God at the center of your dating and relationship efforts. And keep Him there! The most beautiful relationship you can have with a woman will be with God in the center.
I wish you well in your search, Sir Jaime.
I'm sorry to hear you are haved bad experiences. I would have to agree with what Dawn said. If a guy's profile doesn't say much or they don't use proper grammer I usually don't look twice at the guy. If they sound like a good, interesting person in their profile I will give them a shot.
I hope you meet the person God has planned for you and enjoy the time you spend searching.
I'm not sure exactly how to answer that question because it varies by individual. If you have been on this site long enough, then you have had expereinces on here about lack of responses, etc, etc. That makes up at least 10% of all threads in "Single Liiving" in some form or another What I do suggest is to use proper grammar in communications. When I see a woman with poor writing skills, it is a turn off and dont even bother. I hope you don't take offense. Just thought I'd throw it out because how you communicate can say a lot about you.
I would not use the word "Judging" but rather Preferences. Everyone has them even you, and most of us, probably without knowing it make decisions everyday based on those preferences such as where we eat, shop, who we hang out with, call often etc.etc.. It's based on what you have learned over time, and what you feel comfortable with. We just have to respect what each other prefers, and remember that what we want in another person often may be what we ourselves are or aspire to be. Hang in there, be positive, and always keep striving to be the best person you can be.
Hugs Jaime!! I wish I had a good answer for you, but I don't. I don't really have a clue why some people respond and others don't. I am still trying to figure this entire thing out myself. As for me, I've sort of decided to participate in the forums, where at least sometimes, I can engage with others, without the overall cloud of matching. I haven't really scanned profiles, other than the ones that pop up every so many days in my search thing. And, the viewed me or the match thing. Which brings a question, if someone views your profile should you say hi?? I don't know, as it seems to me, if they viewed the profile and had wanted to say something they would have done so, but you read the top of the page and it says something like these people viewed your profile and were interested in knowing more. . .but it isn't like there is a button on the screen that says I viewed you and would like to know more about you, maybe they just viewed your profile in passing?? I don't know lol.
A lot of I don't knows in this message, which I know is not very helpful. One thing I do know, do not and I really mean this, do not assume you are getting no response because someone thinks you are ugly, that is an assumption that just breeds negative feelings and makes you feel bad and may be the furthest thing from the truth. All of us can go there and none of us should. I know more easily said than done.
External beauty is a shell that may or may not reflect the true beauty of a person, which comes from inside period. And, has absolutely nothing to do with the worth and dignity of a person. Cultivate charity, dignity, kindness, a fine mind, a giving heart and a grateful, joyous soul and that will radiate through and transforms everything about you and around you.
Life is exquisite. Embrace it, contemplate it, cherish it, contribute to it and share it in any way possible.
First, I can't speak for everyone but I think it would be safe to assume many of us feel this way one time or another. This online thing is not easy. I feel many men my age overlook me because I am not young enough or thin enough ect. It seems to me that people want perfection when it comes to looks. Are you approaching women who look like "real" woman and not the fantasy women the media has deemed as beautiful? I read on a profile once (but not here) "if you are not drop dead gorgeous, don't bother contacting me". Sad but true.
Second, God is guiding you Jamie, but you need to keep yourself exposed so you and right woman can find each other. If the women are not responding, that means she's not the one so don't lament but keep on moving forward. Don't give up. Keep hitting that send button to as many women as possible and the right one will repond if you are meant to find someone here.