(Quote) Kerry-970208 said:
I am new to CM and it's hard to know where I fit in. I am almost 49 (tomorrow), and newly wid...
(Quote) Kerry-970208 said:
I am new to CM and it's hard to know where I fit in. I am almost 49 (tomorrow), and newly widowed. I have 3 boys, the only one still at home is 13. I am broken hearted over my beloved spouse's death from cancer and I have never been alone in my life, paid bills, dealt with broken appliances or cars, etc. At church I feel like a fifth wheel--everyone I know seems to have a spouse and kids. I thought of myself as a catholic wife and mom--even had a blog--and now--I don't know what I am or where I fit in. I hate feeling this way.
Hi Kerry, I'm sorry for your loss.
Below is an article in my Archdiocese newsletter, which I find helpful. Maybe it will do the same for you.
HEALINGS IN THE HEART OF
By Rev. Rodney Kneifl
Have you ever looked at the front cover of
a 1000 piece puzzle and thought, “I must
put this beautiful picture together”? When
the time comes to open the puzzle box and
we begin to sort out the pieces, we realize
that this will not fit together as quickly as a
child’s five piece game. We usually begin
by looking for difference of color, shape,
or size and the border pieces to start the
building process on the table. Almost
every person begins to pray for patience
about 5 minutes into the puzzle process.
This is going to take longer than we
Healing at Different Speeds
Some hurts in a person’s life are so large
and there are so many strings attached to
the situation, like the pieces of a 1000 part
puzzle; it takes a while for Jesus to con-
vince us of His way and style of bringing
about total cure. A change of the way of
life, the way we speak, act, or live is a
turning toward the kingdom. A form of
healing begins because we desire to return
to the Kingdom of Jesus’ love. It can be
hurtful to leave that old life style and the
darkness that was so familiar to our life.
There is great light and love from Jesus
when we give up blaming everyone else
for our troubles, acceptance of our broken-
ness and even asking Jesus to love those
areas of our lives that have not been loved
for so long. Jesus is also ready to release
us from the bondage that keeps us in this
way of darkness, blame and difficulty.
Jesus can literally heal us in the blink of an
eye. All that Jesus does is always in
accord with the Father’s love and will; that
the best may be done for each one of us.
Jesus Christ the Redeemer came as a help-
less infant. He wanted to be like one of
Five Ways God Uses Problems
The problems we face will either defeat us
or develop us depending on how we
respond to them. Unfortunately, most peo-
ple fail to see how God wants to use prob-
lems for good in our lives. Here are five
ways God wants to use the problems in our
1.God uses problems to DIRECT us.
Sometimes God must light a fire under
us to get us moving. Problems often
point us in a new direction and moti-
vate us to change. Is God trying to get
our attention? “Trust in the Lord with
all your heart; and lean not unto your
own understanding. In all thy ways
acknowledge Him, and He will direct
you paths. “ (Proverbs 3: 5-6)
2.God uses problems to INSPECT us.
People are like tea bags. If you want
to know what’s inside them, just drop
them into hot water! Has God tested
your faith with a problem? What do
problems reveal about us? “When you
have many kinds of troubles, you
should be full of joy, because you
know that these troubles test your
faith, and this will give you patience”
(James 1: 2-3).
3. God uses problems to CORRECT us.
Some lessons we learn only through
pain and failure. It’s likely that as a
child your parents told you not to
touch a hot stove. But you probably
learned by being burned. Sometimes
we only learn the value of something
by losing it. “It is good for me that I
have been afflicted; that I might learn
thy statutes” (Psalm 119: 72).
4. God uses problems to PROTECT us.
A problem can be a blessing in
disguise if it prevents us from being
harmed by something more serious.
Last year a friend was fired for refus-
ing to do something unethical that his
boss had asked him to do. His unem-
ployment was a problem, but it saved
him from being convicted and sent to
prison a year later when manage-
ment’s actions were eventually
discovered. “You intended to harm me,
but God intended it for good”
5. God uses problems to PERFECT us.
Problems, when responded to correctly,
are character builders.
God is far more interested in your character than yourcomfort.
Your relationship to God and yourcharacter are the only two things we’re
going to take with us into eternity. “We
can rejoice when we run into prob-
lems...they help us learn to be patient.
And patience develops strength of charac-
ter in us and helps us trust God more each
time we use it until finally our hope and
faith are strong and steady” (Romans 5:
Here’s the point :
God is at work in
our lives-even when we don’t recognize it
or understand it. But it’s so much easier
when we surrender to his plan for our life.
It is never easy going through life’s hurts
and difficulties. There are many ways that
Jesus will bring a conclusion to the bro-
kenness. Jesus has good ears; He can hear
even the tiniest whisper in our heart, that
we need help. He honors that deep request
from within. Take the first step and bring
your pain to Him.
We have nothing to fear
from Him. Jesus is good at healing.
“They carried to Him all those afflicted
with various diseases and racked with
pain: the possessed, the lunatics, the para-
lyzed. He cured them all” (Matthew 4:24).
Jesus knows how to handle all the pieces
in our lives