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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

May 14 new

Yeah, but I remembered...after only, what? Four years? scratchchin

Do I get a prize? mischievous

May 15 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: Are you saying that only women are capable of being considerate and unselfish? I think that if yo...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

Are you saying that only women are capable of being considerate and unselfish? I think that if you are you are doing a disservice to the good men who are capable of these actions. Every human being natural tendencies are narcissistic. To be considerate and unselfish is a choice that either sex can make. Women because of the nurturing element of their personalities often find it easier. It does not mean that men are not capable of it and indeed there are many examples of it in good Catholic men.

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I was was not saying that "only women are capable of being considerate and unselfish". I did say that some complaints by women about men seem to amount to wanting men to be more feminine or more womanly.

May 15 new

(Quote) Elizabeth-384374 said: Umm...wouldn't a man want a woman to remember stuff like food allergies too? I hav...
(Quote) Elizabeth-384374 said:

Umm...wouldn't a man want a woman to remember stuff like food allergies too?

I have said before and it needs to be said again, both sexes should not be grouped together like this - individuals of both sexes want different things; however, as a group, almost all of humanity would like to be treated with kindness and courtesy.

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No a man would want to forget about her allergies so that she'll have a seizure so that he can seize her and kiss her disguised as mouth-to-mouth resus. I guess you have not run into the trick yet? eyebrow

May 15 new

(Quote) Roy-964611 said: Paraphrasing CS Lewis: "A woman means by unselfishness chiefly taking trouble for others, whil...
(Quote) Roy-964611 said:

Paraphrasing CS Lewis: "A woman means by unselfishness chiefly taking trouble for others, while a man means not giving trouble to others. Therefore, both sexes, without conscious hypocrisy, can and do regard each other as radically selfish."


Continuing with this thought, a woman likes it when someone pays attention while a man likes it when someone doesn't demand attention. There's no right or wrong here, just the need for understanding and love to bridge the gap.

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Thanks for an interesting contribution, especially the words, "a man likes it when someone doesn't demand attention".

May 15 new

(Quote) Naomi-825244 said: John, that's awesome!!! If someone actually was listening to me and brings something up later...
(Quote) Naomi-825244 said:

John, that's awesome!!! If someone actually was listening to me and brings something up later, I'm always so happy and my thoughts jump from "I told him that?" to "wow! he must care for me or something!"

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Thanks for letting me know that you identify so strongly with the reaction of the women in the situation I described. It's still surprising that so little could mean so much. scratchchin

May 15 new

(Quote) Pauline-931463 said: John, it might seem a simple act but by that act you showed to her that you listened and when w...
(Quote) Pauline-931463 said:

John, it might seem a simple act but by that act you showed to her that you listened and when we listen, we show the other person, that they are worth it, you care about them and are not self centred. well done

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G'day Pauline

Good onya for letting me know that a woman from Down Under also agrees that it doesn't take something as big a thunder to strike a woman deeply.

John

May 15 new

(Quote) John-184825 said: No a man would want to forget about her allergies so that she'll have a seizure so that he can...
(Quote) John-184825 said:

No a man would want to forget about her allergies so that she'll have a seizure so that he can seize her and kiss her disguised as mouth-to-mouth resus. I guess you have not run into the trick yet?

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Are you trying to be funny? Because I am revolted that anyone would think going into anaphylactic shock -someone dying- could be humourous. Anaphylactic shock is not a "seizure" - my dog has those and I'll get to that in a bit- rather it causes your airway to close and your blood pressure to drop rapidly. If not treated people can - and have- died. I have gone into anaphylactic shock - thankfully in a hosptial- and it took an hour before I was able to "come to" in the sense that I understood and remembered where I was and what I was doing there.

My dog has eplispy - ie, seizures. Let me explain in vivid detail what happens: She knows when she is about to get a seizure and starts to eat anything that has salt in it. This includes dirty kleenex and garbage. If I don't give her extra medication or if the extra medication doesn't work, the seizure happens. She'll sit up, like she's about to shake her head as many dogs do, but her head gets "stuck" and it looks like she's screaming in pain but no sounds comes. Rather, her body twitches back and forth, she falls over, and she continues to twitch. This is the grand mal seizure. Her mouth is agape the entire time, her tongue sticks out to the side, she is foaming at the mouth, and the twitching can last for up to 2 minutes. Thank God that it only lasts a few seconds anymore with the new medication. Once the twitchy is over, the seizure isn't. She'll lie there for a good minute to two, eyes dilated - all this time from the onset of the seizure, I'm petting her and singing/talking to her- and be completely unable to respond. Her breaths are shallow. It's only after this that she starts to break out of the seizure. She'll try to get up but can't. Her legs can't support her right away. She'll fall down to her side, her legs slipping under her if I don't catch her in time. Once she can stand, she'll sniff start to sniff everything around her. However, she still isn't oriented and is in a dream like /drunken type state. Thank God again that my pup is a "happy drunk" because in several epilepsy forums I've heard of people and animals that come out of the seizure snarling and biting. They have no idea what they are doing as their brain is basically rebooting. Once she can walk on all fours to some degree, I need to let her outside immediately because she has no control over any of her muscles. This drunken puppy stage can last up to a half hour but typically only last 5 minutes with her. It's after this the seizure is completely over and her brain has rebooted. At this point, I need to give her more medication and an asprin.

Does any of that sound fun? Does it sound like something that another person would risk happening if they even liked the individual with allergies or epilepsy? What you described isn't even humane let alone Christian. Food allergies and epilepsy aren't things to be played with - they are life and death situations.

May 15 new
Truly listening and conversation engagement is the key to all relationships. That is why it is so important to women and means a lot when men actually listen to them. I would think it is the same for me.
May 16 new

(Quote) Roystan-340472 said: Do hyperthymesiacs impress each other in the way in which you would like to be impressed, or is...
(Quote) Roystan-340472 said:

Do hyperthymesiacs impress each other in the way in which you would like to be impressed, or is an imperfect memory and the accident of remembering something of significance to the significant other the necessary key to an "ooh, you remembered" bonding moment?

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The referent is not the key to win "oohs" from OZ. That a he heard me is what she sees and is seized by.

May 16 new

(Quote) Eileen-890971 said: Hello John, I think you are right that it is BIG when a man remembers some part of the ...
(Quote) Eileen-890971 said:

Hello John,

I think you are right that it is BIG when a man remembers some part of the communication. Actually, you are saying the woman felt it was BIG. Do you know the little numbers at the deli and you are waiting for,your number to be called? You are kind of daydreaming, making out the rest of your grocery list, making your todo list and all of a sudden, the clerk calls your number and you come out of your stupor thinking "that's me". Well, it is something like that...kind of a surprise but you are anticipating it.

I like your subjects, John. You have a computer mind John and not all men are like that. Kudos to you!

Eileen
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Hi Eileen,

Thank for the matching, explanatory example. Just hope my number isn't up yet. eyepopping

Also I appreciate the kudos.

John

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