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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people under 45. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

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Not Working?

May 19th 2013 new
I haven't been on here that long but I feel like I'm already a failure in this. I trust God to lead me but maybe this isn't the right path? I'm not sure what to do, do I give up or do I keep my head up and truck on? I'd really like someone's opinion on this, please.

God Bless,
Nikki
May 19th 2013 new
First, a hug

Second, this is reality. Hardly anybody meets someone right away, and many meet no one at all. It doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. Honestly, I think in most cases it means the other sex is missing out on a good bargain. smile

Third, treat CM as a place to have discussions with people who (mostly) share your world view. Make friends -- guys AND gals. You can find enrichment in these friends and in the discussions you will have with them, and that is valuable.

If you keep your expectations low, CM is a lot of fun. If you think it's a Fairy Godmother who will deliver Prince Charming on a plate, your heart will ache as all of ours did before we learned the above lessons. WELCOME!

May 19th 2013 new
I agree with Marge. Treat CM as a place where you can connect with other Catholics who are on the same journey. CM is a good place to share your thoughts, ask questions, and make friends. CM may eventually lead you to Mr. Right or help you build connections that will support you on whatever path that God has chosen for you.
May 22nd 2013 new
Nikki,

I'm not gonna lie but I somewhat feel the same way. I have only been on here for a week now and at this point I'm just trying to make friends. I guess when the right time comes and I find someone then cool but at least in the week I've been on here I've made a couple friends already. Don't get me wrong I would like find someone to share life with and to help me with my little girl but I guess now isn't the right time. I guess time will tell but in the mean time I hope you find at least good friends out of this. Take care

Rick
May 23rd 2013 new
I've been on here 3 months and have sent probably 100 messages. I 've only gotten 1 reply so far so either I'm totally repulsive or the men on CM are not serious about making friends and possibly life partners.
May 23rd 2013 new
(quote) Nicole-958786 said: I've been on here 3 months and have sent probably 100 messages. I 've only gotten 1 reply so far so either I'm totally repulsive or the men on CM are not serious about making friends and possibly life partners.
Or... your choice of men to contact correlates poorly with those who are interested in you.

One observation: this being a Catholic web site, many of the members are looking specifically for others who are in accord with the Catholic faith. Some of the responses in the Faith section of your profile are likely to dissuade some who might otherwise be interested in you.


May 23rd 2013 new
Hey everybody, wave

I share the weeping weeping OK. Now that I've done that, I cannot believe how many people believe in all sincerity that they will meet the love of their life in under five minutes, five hours, five days or five weeks. Relationships are not fast food. This is not McDonalds!

In real life, not everyone I meet in a week is Catholic. I do attend Mass regularly, so those people I know are Catholic. But the rest of the week, I might not meet a single Catholic at work, the grocery store or wherever. Why would anyone expect to meet the love of your life at the snap of your fingers? Just fill out a profile, do the personality test, discover you are choleric/melancholic or whatever, do the trivia quiz, and PRESTO! - a Catholic spouse is delivered in under 48 hours! WOW! rolling eyes

Can anyone do that for a job, a new car, or anything else significant? The answer is NO.
For a new job, you have to develop a resume, make sure you have references that you can contact, do your homework on who is hiring, check job boards, send out dozens of resumes to dozens of employers, and guess what? You MIGHT get an interview. But just snap your fingers and order a spouse. rolling eyes I don't mean to sound uncharitable, perhaps sarcasm is getting the better of me this evening, but maybe a reality check is in order.
May 23rd 2013 new
Nicole,

Hugs as well. It kind of reminds me of the middle school dances, all the new teens want one, then they stand in groups across the gym from each other, the boys shuffling their feet and trying to work up the nerve to go over and ask someone to dance. The girls analyzing and praying and watching every move the boys make, hoping through sheer will the boys will come over and ask them to dance. :-))

And, I only partly jest.

Marge is right though, participate in other aspects, get to know people and let what happens happen.
May 24th 2013 new
All good things take time. Hang in there...cm is a tool....not a delivery service.....use the tool while you have a subscription....Good luck!
May 27th 2013 new
Nicole,

I feel the same way... sending messages to ladies but rarely receiving replies. I think most women view the fact I am divorced and have children as a problem, which is unfortunate because I have so much to give to a woman who appreciates that lessons and experiences from my past have led to a desire to build a marriage on the right ground now and to ensure I marry someone who shares my faith and desire to bring it into our home. People are looking for that "perfect" person who doesn't exist, and I often wonder if we would let our guards down just a bit whether more of us here would find someone with whom to build a loving marriage that helps both of us (and our future children) get to Heaven.

Keep the faith. I've been a member for awhile. Recently annulled, I'm now taking a proactive role in reaching out to ladies. Haven't given up hope yet, but the worries you have are shared by many here (including me.)

This site is simply one tool to find a mate. Involvement in the forums is a big help, because it puts your name out in the presence of others reading, who often check profiles of those who post messages. :-)


Blessings,

Michael
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