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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people 45+. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is told in chapters 11-25 of the book of Genesis.
Learn More:Abraham & Sarah

At what point should I simply give up on the search for a husband? Does this mean that I am simply at a place of acceptance for what I have been since my divorce in April 1995 -- single?
My life is settled, meaning stable, and that is good. I have so much more than many people my age -- three highly functional adult children, an education, fascinating work, a home that I own. I also have had the love of a good man who died just 5-1/2 months after we started dating. That love, my "being seen" for such a short time, allowed me to blossom and grow in unfathomable ways, causing a ripple effect through my life and others' lives.

I'm not trying to feel sorry for myself by starting this thread. I just have more time than usual in which to ponder my situation. Please share how you address this question yourselves, my friends. Sure I'm not the only person here with these struggles. cool
May 27th 2013 new
When the casket is wheeled into the church and they place the baptismal ceremonial robe across the casket and the priest sprinkles my reamins with Holy Water. I don't think one should ever give up and never stop changing because the ohly times this happens is in death. I think we need to re-evaluate our thinking and be open to love in every shape and form and be open to all possibilities. Throw away the check list and allow God to lead and keep working on one's self to become the best person we can and then when the right person comes along they will recognize it. If marriage was not in the cards, then you have still lived your life full of love, happiness and peace and shared it with others, hopefully some that are less fortuante. Yes intimacy with another is very painful at tiimes and lonely but at the same time, go before the blessed sacrament and He will fill you with all that you need at that moment. Love begins and ends there.
May 27th 2013 new
I would also suggest since you help form functionally children - share your life with other young children and help them. Don't even think about whether the right one is going to come along. If he does great, if he doesn't you will have foster loved with people and helped another life grow.
May 27th 2013 new
I haven't given up and I've been divorced over 30 years. I think that, for the most part, we simply need to change our focus. For a while I started sewing for a charity. A friend was crocheting matching baby hats, blankets, and booties for the NICU at the children's hospital. I became more active in my parish. I also started taking classes. I will be taking Astronomy classes soon. The Red Cross can use volunteers. You can go to your local library and join a book club. A lot of bookstores also have them. I am not sure if I will ever find Mr. Right, but I have long ago decided that I will live a full active life. I have not given up the search, it is just not going to define me. It is also important to let your close friends know to be sure to invite their single men friends to whatever they are hosting. They don't need to be trying to hook you up, but you truly never know. I have met the parents of my kids (33 & 35) friends over the years. It makes for good dance partner at weddings etc. if you are athletic, join a cycle group or some other casual thing. Hope it helps! You will be in my prayers!
May 27th 2013 new
(quote) Christine-960631 said: I haven't given up and I've been divorced over 30 years. I think that, for the most part, we simply need to change our focus. For a while I started sewing for a charity. A friend was crocheting matching baby hats, blankets, and booties for the NICU at the children's hospital. I became more active in my parish. I also started taking classes. I will be taking Astronomy classes soon. The Red Cross can use volunteers. You can go to your local library and join a book club. A lot of bookstores also have them. I am not sure if I will ever find Mr. Right, but I have long ago decided that I will live a full active life. I have not given up the search, it is just not going to define me. It is also important to let your close friends know to be sure to invite their single men friends to whatever they are hosting. They don't need to be trying to hook you up, but you truly never know. I have met the parents of my kids (33 & 35) friends over the years. It makes for good dance partner at weddings etc. if you are athletic, join a cycle group or some other casual thing. Hope it helps! You will be in my prayers!
Christine, thanks for your wisdom. My focus shifted more out to the world after my youngest child left for college 2 years ago. Since March 2012, I've served on the board of directors of my local food co-op. That really helps fulfill my desire to help our planet continue to offer healthy food to the world, it helps my striving for social justice and it has provided me with a neat community to whom I hadn't really reached out.

Mary, something that you wrote reminded me that I needed to go to Adoration at my church tomorrow. Thank you both for your comments and support.

I wonder if men ever feel like giving up.
May 27th 2013 new
I gave up in my heart a long, long time ago.
I'm just here for the longshot chance. The Steve McGarett "maybe, just maybe" chance.
May 27th 2013 new
(quote) Marge-938695 said: I gave up in my heart a long, long time ago.
I'm just here for the longshot chance. The Steve McGarett "maybe, just maybe" chance.
Marge,
I'm holding the hope for you. hug I'm holding the hope. hug
Margo

May 27th 2013 new
I am under 45, but ran across this post.

Prayers for all of you. I've struggled with this, too. Being along is the worst thing. I've decided to start branching out, after career loss last year that was paralyzing, and to just do things...anything to keep from being alone.

This will put me in company of other people, which is the first thing I need. And perhaps I will meet someone that way (or here.) Prayers that the same will work for you.


Michael
May 28th 2013 new
The dream never dies. I'm still open to dating and a relationship. I do participate when I can and stay positive. I am only alone when I think I am. When I remember who is really with me, I am never alone.

May 28th 2013 new
(quote) Michael-780154 said: I am under 45, but ran across this post.

Prayers for all of you. I've struggled with this, too. Being along is the worst thing. I've decided to start branching out, after career loss last year that was paralyzing, and to just do things...anything to keep from being alone.

This will put me in company of other people, which is the first thing I need. And perhaps I will meet someone that way (or here.) Prayers that the same will work for you.


Michael
Thank you, Michael. I feel as if I know you, based on our exchanges in the forums.
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