(quote) Kerry-970208 said: I have a 13 year old son with Asperger's syndrome (a milder form of autism) that has always been extremely difficult to handle--incredible stamina for hanging on and refusing to do what you say for HOURS even when small, such as you put him to bed, he got up, you put him back to bed, he got up again, and this would go on for 4 to 5 hours.
Now, we have tried everything with him--therapists, neurologists, psychiatrists galore, school interventionists, calling the police, looking for in patient hospitaization to get his meds stable (which he often refuses to take) only to find out that since he only has CHIPs insurance, no one will take him as an inpatient unless he is actively homicidal or suicidal..
Now, my husband is deceased. My son is four inches taller and outweighs me. I cannot get him to take his meds or do anything. I have two older boys, now grown, and never had this much trouble with either one. This is a 24-7-365 fight over everything, and I have lost all control.. Trying to regain control over a 13 year old very strong and almost always very angry is turning into an impossible task. Taking away priviliges doesn't work--he has few as it is, as we are poor, and he doesn't seem to care of he loses them. Nothing motivates him except seeing me cry.
Kerry -- some states have provisions for situations such as this. In Wisconsin, there are group homes staffed by professional counselors, plus some "day care" programs. They are government supported, so your financial situation won't become worse. Obviously, if you could afford to pay, it would be expected. They work with the youngsters as best they can -- trying to help them toward independence.
Sometimes meds are counterproductive and make the symptoms worse. It's different in each case, of course, but there isn't anything that will work for everybody. Sometimes it's necessary to try out different meds to see what works and what doesn't.
You might try your local health department for information about such programs or to see what else might exist in your area. You're apparently feeling intimidated because of his physical size compared to yours. No doubt he's picked up on that.