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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Where to begin?

Jun 7th 2013 new
Where do you begin to learn how/where to meet people and deal with this whole process called "dating"? I seriously haven't been on a date since 1989 when I met my ex-husband. Any and all help, thoughts, suggetions will be welcomed.
Jun 8th 2013 new
Dana, here are my thoughts and suggestions:

First, prepare yourself that you are free and ready to date.

Pray to God for guidance; make your aspirations known to Him, even though he knows already. By doing so, he will prepare you to know which aspirations he finds worthy and which ones you still have to work on, and maybe have to give up. Maybe you will also discover those you should also take up.

So, are you sure that God can bless every one of those expectations of yours? And if you have aspirations that are not properly ordered or are not really free to date, all your future dates are doomed to ultimate failure if he's not in the mix. So, is it about fun for a time, or is it about everlasting happiness? We each have to decide this.

For those married before, this should imply at least two things: first, your previous marriage was discerned and annulled. Sorry, I didn't check your profile. If not, get that going; see your parish priest. Second, if you gave unresolved personal circumstances; get those handled too. You owe it to yourself and to possibly a man in your life, if it be God's will. An active parish life for us never hurts. Pursuing interests or causes that show our dedication and practice to those matters important to us is also a natural way to cross paths with others of like minds and compatibilities.

Beyond this, assuming that you have already done all this... well, maybe all you need is be still and go about your normal life and let God's mysterious ways have some room to work in it?

The one thing I really find attractive in a woman is one that doesn't just sit around waiting, doing nothing; she does things in a way that would make life with her interesting. Men tend to have more of the seek out mentality and God will usually put a man properly disposed on the path He wants him on.

In every circumstance where God is actively in the mix, results are amazing!



Jun 8th 2013 new
Thank you for your thoughts. My marriage has been annulled and I am free to begin dating. My ultimate goal is to find the person God has picked for me, hopefully he has picked one for me smile Praying I spent a lot of time in prayer after my divorce and during the annulment process and have made great progress, but there is always work to be done and I don't think God is ever finished with us.

I guess it's just going to be a very frustrating, scary, intimidating process since I haven't dated since high school. I guess patience and God's guidance is what I need. Blessings to you, John.
Jun 8th 2013 new
Yes, Dana, it is a complicated, scary, confusing process--this dating as a single-again person.
My prayer is for God to show me His will unmistakably. The prayer to the Archangel Raphael is a good one as are the ones other people have suggested.
Keeping busy, putting yourself in places where meeting new people is a given, searching out resources such as local singles groups with a church affiliation, books, workshops.
I appreciate that I can come to these CM forums & voice my questions and concerns, especially in the Women's room, and receive advice & prayers.
Jun 8th 2013 new
(quote) Dana-782979 said: Thank you for your thoughts. My marriage has been annulled and I am free to begin dating. My ultimate goal is to find the person God has picked for me, hopefully he has picked one for me I spent a lot of time in prayer after my divorce and during the annulment process and have made great progress, but there is always work to be done and I don't think God is ever finished with us.

I guess it's just going to be a very frustrating, scary, intimidating process since I haven't dated since high school. I guess patience and God's guidance is what I need. Blessings to you, John.
Welcome to CM, Dana!

No worries; have a great weekend.
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