Marriage almost always leads us there, if by no other reason then loving requiring a death to "me". The opportunities to die to myself in marriage are "legion", and they occur "7 times 70" every day. However, do I see them as gifts from God to help transform me into an "Alter Christus", an unconditional lover? Or do I bristle? feel that my dignity has been disrespected? or my rights violated?
I believe in healthy boundaries, non-toxic relationships, and the completely destructive power of emotional abuse. But these are the things we need to discern right now, in the dating phase of the relationship. And even should some of these dysfunctions wound our potential partner, are they capable of understanding what is involved in a sacramental marriage? are they willing to endure "till death do us part"? If so, then Love can endure and heal, and redeem, and restore. But if not...then perhaps it is not the cross that Christ had in mind for us.
I will keep both you and your son in my heart and in my prayers.