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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

I'm wondering what you all have to say.
Jan 11th 2014 new
(quote) Robert-856893 said: I'm wondering what you all have to say.
No. It is not bad marrying someone after knowing them for six (6) months. The truth of marriage is that you continue to discover each other each day of being married. It is the other reason why both must continue to work with each other to keep the sparks in a flame. :-)
Jan 11th 2014 new
Impossible to know anyone after knowing them for only 6 months. Here is the pattern my mother told us to follow:

Be friends with someone you like
Get to know each other for at least a year, or more.
If you really like them, and you think you match, and there is respect, understanding, match as to religion, your mother likes him a lot, he is not controlling, and easy to anger, plus there is love then....
Be engaged for at least a year. You'd be surprised all the baggage that comes up even after a year of engagement. It's better to break up then, than to end up divorced, and God forbid, with children.
After you have passed all these test, then, and only then, go buy a wedding dress, get married in the church, and live happily ever after.
Oh, I forgot, invite me to your wedding.
Victoria
Jan 11th 2014 new
Every relationship is unique - they aren't one size fits all, there isn't a simple answer. Many factors come into play - maturity and stability being big ones. (Spiritually, emotionally, etc.) If it's a yes or no question - then no - I believe in most cases it doesn't work out in the long run.

There are exceptions of course, and I'll venture to say the older the couple is - the more realistic they are in terms of life experiences, expectations, compromises, challenges. I've known some older couples who met and married rather quickly and are doing just fine - they are very happy.

Bottom line - every lasting relationship takes commitment, loyalty and a unselfish mindset from both parties, and a strong drive to keep God at the center of their marriage. Some people have the emotional maturity to do that early on - while some never truly reach that level.


Jan 11th 2014 new
It depends.

My cousin married his now wife after 7 years of dating. But my ex married his now wife after 6-9 months of dating and they seem happy. It really depends on the situation.

As for me - I'd prefer to date for longer - the older I get, the more cautious I am about marriage.
Jan 11th 2014 new
I think it's usually wiser to wait till you've known them at least a year.
Jan 11th 2014 new
(quote) Robert-856893 said: I'm wondering what you all have to say.
Robert, focus on quality, not quantity. I have known many couples who were engaged or married within 6 months and all those situations have been successful, so far. Marriage longevity from 13 years - 50 years. If the 2 are mature, have done their due diligence in terms of premarital preparation, are truly compatible, have a sacrificial love relationship, and have God at the center of their life, I would think they would have marital success.

Sadly, ppl marry without having a handle on the basics, i.e., willingness to compromise, accepting influence from the other spouse, knowing and supporting each other's dreams, talking about perpetual problems without the discussion escalating into an argument, communicating authentically, etc.
Jan 11th 2014 new
I think this is a situation by situation basis. However, I feel that a couple knows within 3 months if they will be together for the long romantic "haul". It is life that challenges and makes you grow as the months and years go by. Life will always bring challenges and change and it is your decision to change and grow with them. heart lovestruck!
Jan 12th 2014 new

1. There are no rules.

2. I wouldn't do it myself.

3. One of the best marriages I ever saw was a co-worker who married on two weeks' acquaintance. The gal accepted him only because she hated her father and wanted to move out. Rocky knew that, married her anyway, and they were a terrific pair 12 years later.

4. One of my longtime CM friends married this past August, to a man she met last April. They are perfect for each other. I think, though, that when you are "up there" in age, you know enough about yourself and what you're looking for that you pay attention to the important things and are less distracted than you are in your 20s.

Jan 12th 2014 new
(quote) Robert-856893 said: I'm wondering what you all have to say.
It depends. One of the best marriages I ever witnessed lasted over thirty years, ended by the death of the husband and took place after one week of knowing each other.

Pete asked me to marry him four weeks from our first date, we didn't marry for another nine months, but went another twenty-five years until his death.


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