Ten months is a very fresh wound, especially when one has been married such a long time.
Several ears ago a CM man in your position posted a beautiful poem he wrote entitled "Without Her There Is No Me".
That's not quite right. Without her/him, there is no "we" -- but there IS a me, and you must uncover who he is. He's not the unmarried 21-year-old you. He's not the 35-year-old you. He's not even the 70-year-old you. He is someone new whom you have to get to know, because all these years your focus has been on "us" and "her".
Start working on figuring out who you are now. In my experience, that's what makes it get better -- and once you know who you are now, you are ready for a new relationship, if you want one.
Wishing you all the best. :rose
I am so very sorry for your loss.
Ten months is a very fresh wound although I do understand you were grieving before she died.
I remember saying that when my husband died I lost 50% of myself. We were very close.
I continue to think of him frequently and know we will have eternity together.
It has been 7 years and I have my strength and balance back. I am a whole person again with wisdom, energy and enjoying life. It takes whatever time it takes. There are no short cuts. You will find little things that help you. Push yourself to go out to dinner with friends, family when the opportunity comes up. Reading the bible every night before I went to bed helped me a lot and I read the New Testament beginning to end more than once. It is full of love and compassion. Daily mass did not help me although I thought it would.
When you feel whole again and have found the "new" you is the time to consider dating again if you want to.
I truly wish you the very best.
I am so sorry for your loss. I am nine months out over the sudden loss of my husband. One of my CM friends offered a book that I have been reading "Second Firsts" by Christina Rasmussen. The book, along with prayer, talking to people and staying active have helped me to cope. Know that you are richly blessed and abundantly loved by a God with a plan for you. His plan is perfect even if you can't see that right now. Don't ever stop thinking about her, just allow your heart the time it needs to heal and grow and make room for whatever God has planned for you.
I will keep you in my prayers.
Also the recommended book- Second Firsts is GREAT!!