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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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When I find a woman's profile compelling -- and by "compelling", I mean when a profile makes me think she and I share enough in common to make me want to initiate contact -- what is the best way to go about making the introduction? Because, clearly, I must be doing something horribly wrong.

Generally, I'll write something like:

----
Hello,
I really enjoyed reading your profile! I think we may have a few interests in common, and I would like the opportunity to get to know you better.
All the best,
Eric
----

Depending, I may offer a genuine compliment on a beautiful smile, or inquire about one the interests she mentions.

Yet, almost without fail, these messages seem to fall into a gargantuan black hole! Don't get me wrong -- I don't expect every inquiry to receive a response: after all, she may read my profile and feel no interest. And that's fine -- that's what dating is all about. But to practically *never* receive a response... I must be doing something wrong.

Since I've heard it said that women expect the man to make the approach, I have to conclude my approaches are lacking. Of course, I have to assume that at least some of the women with whom I try to make contact would view my profile, so I wonder if my profile needs repair?

I'm a decent guy: I'm hard-working, talented, resourceful, a good father, loyal, attentive, communicative, and though I'm not Brad Pitt attractive, I certainly wasn't beaten with an ugly stick, either. So I have to think I'm not "advertising" myself properly.

So, for the Ladies, here's the age-old question: what are women looking for in a first contact? And what am I doing wrong?

Thanks!
Mar 30th 2014 new
I usually respond to messages I get unless they are too old for me.
Mar 30th 2014 new
(quote) Eric-1075760 said: When I find a woman's profile compelling -- and by "compelling", I mean when a profile makes me think she and I share enough in common to make me want to initiate contact -- what is the best way to go about making the introduction? Because, clearly, I must be doing something horribly wrong.

Generally, I'll write something like:

----
Hello,
I really enjoyed reading your profile! I think we may have a few interests in common, and I would like the opportunity to get to know you better.
All the best,
Eric
----

Depending, I may offer a genuine compliment on a beautiful smile, or inquire about one the interests she mentions.

Yet, almost without fail, these messages seem to fall into a gargantuan black hole! Don't get me wrong -- I don't expect every inquiry to receive a response: after all, she may read my profile and feel no interest. And that's fine -- that's what dating is all about. But to practically *never* receive a response... I must be doing something wrong.

Since I've heard it said that women expect the man to make the approach, I have to conclude my approaches are lacking. Of course, I have to assume that at least some of the women with whom I try to make contact would view my profile, so I wonder if my profile needs repair?

I'm a decent guy: I'm hard-working, talented, resourceful, a good father, loyal, attentive, communicative, and though I'm not Brad Pitt attractive, I certainly wasn't beaten with an ugly stick, either. So I have to think I'm not "advertising" myself properly.

So, for the Ladies, here's the age-old question: what are women looking for in a first contact? And what am I doing wrong?

Thanks!
Eric,
I think your approach is just fine. Do you know if these women that you send a message to actually look at your profile? If it's any consolation Eric, this happens to women all the time on this site too. We send a message or an emote with a brief message, and we get the cold shoulder. I sometimes wonder if anyone on this site really is interested in actually meeting someone or whether they just want to be able to say "well, I tried but there isn't any one decent out there." Sorry for your frustration!

Peace,
Kimberlie
Mar 30th 2014 new
(quote) Eric-1075760 said: When I find a woman's profile compelling -- and by "compelling", I mean when a profile makes me think she and I share enough in common to make me want to initiate contact -- what is the best way to go about making the introduction? Because, clearly, I must be doing something horribly wrong.

Generally, I'll write something like:

----
Hello,
I really enjoyed reading your profile! I think we may have a few interests in common, and I would like the opportunity to get to know you better.
All the best,
Eric
----

Depending, I may offer a genuine compliment on a beautiful smile, or inquire about one the interests she mentions.

Yet, almost without fail, these messages seem to fall into a gargantuan black hole! Don't get me wrong -- I don't expect every inquiry to receive a response: after all, she may read my profile and feel no interest. And that's fine -- that's what dating is all about. But to practically *never* receive a response... I must be doing something wrong.

Since I've heard it said that women expect the man to make the approach, I have to conclude my approaches are lacking. Of course, I have to assume that at least some of the women with whom I try to make contact would view my profile, so I wonder if my profile needs repair?

I'm a decent guy: I'm hard-working, talented, resourceful, a good father, loyal, attentive, communicative, and though I'm not Brad Pitt attractive, I certainly wasn't beaten with an ugly stick, either. So I have to think I'm not "advertising" myself properly.

So, for the Ladies, here's the age-old question: what are women looking for in a first contact? And what am I doing wrong?

Thanks!
Welcome, Eric! I think that is a great message to send a lady...Perhaps some are not paid members? I don't know but it very polite and sweet. Hang in there!
Mar 30th 2014 new
(quote) Joan-930276 said: I usually respond to messages I get unless they are too old for me.
Eric meet Joan, ...Joan meet Eric.
lovestruck!

Well, there ya go... highfive

Mar 30th 2014 new
(quote) Michele-1074439 said: Eric meet Joan, ...Joan meet Eric.


Well, there ya go...

Boy, that's original! tongue laughing



theheart
Mar 30th 2014 new
(quote) Eric-1075760 said: So, for the Ladies, here's the age-old question: what are women looking for in a first contact? And what am I doing wrong?

1.) What are women looking for in a first contact? I've had a rough week here, so I'll leave this one alone. wink

2.) What are you doing wrong? Aside from becoming, perhaps, a little impatient after only a week... nothing. You have the right idea, so just keep doing what you're doing right now.




theheart
Mar 30th 2014 new
(quote) Victor-544727 said: Boy, that's original!




Yea, I can be very cleaver when I try. wink laughing

If only it was that simple, right?
Mar 30th 2014 new
laughing I mean 'clever'..
Mar 30th 2014 new
(quote) Michele-1074439 said: I mean 'clever'..
No, you were probably right the first time. rolling eyes




theheart
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