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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people under 45. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

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My dear friends in faith,
I wish someone could explain to me why there are so many people on this website who don't accept all the Church's teachings. Especially in regard to premarital sex. As a Catholic I don't believe I could qualify my self as a Catholic if I believed that sex is okay out of the union of Marriage. I mean these are "fundamentals" if you will to the life of a Catholic. I am not trying to be negative or a Debbie downer, but am I really that old fashioned that I believe anyone who joins this site should be a 7 out of 7!!! This world is so consumed with itself.... there is a great quote by St. Titus- "If you want to win the world for Christ you must have the courage to come in contact with it." I want to win the world for Christ by coming in contact with it, but not at the expense of my soul. I feel the call to marriage, but not in the way some people on here expect it. I am going to be very blunt by saying that if you find yourself on Catholic Match and you are not waiting till marriage to engage in sex, you are living a lie. You can not serve God and wealth( the world)....I am writing this message not to be mean or over Orthodox, but for the people on here who strive to be a 7 out of 7.My friends who are, its not an easy task, but you are so pleasing in the site of God and I want you to know you are not alone. As for the people who aren't you have my prayers and compassion for conversion. Just remember that every nail, whip, and spiked chain Jesus was lashed with during his scourging was done for the sins of impurity. Just imagine any time we sin against this virtue we are forcing Jesus to go back to that spot and feel the excruciating pain of the scourging over and over again. God Bless you all.
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Jul 7th 2014 new
Bridie = = = only 21 yrs and so wise. THANK YOU THANK YOU for taking the courage to write about this. YOU are so right about everything you have been so brave to "put out there" I have thought these same thoughts but must admit, I admire your strength to put it out there in black and white. EVERYTHING you have said is the truth and you will be rewarded. Thank you, thank you, thank YOU.
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Jul 7th 2014 new
Hi Birdie,

welcome to CM and the Forums.Some will respond to this Topic by saying that some members checked NO to certain questions, because they have engaged in that particular behavior in the past,and don't want to come off as a hypocrite.Even though they currently do not engage in that said behavior.

This is the explanation that has been given countless times in the Forums on this 7/7 Topic over the years I have been here anyway.

The way the 7/7 questions are posed, indicate to me,that we are being asked if We Accept them in principle,not;have we ever fallen from Grace.Apparently,some do not understand them they same way.

Having said that,in my personal experience/contact with those Women who say they Do Not Accept the Church's teachings;I have found that to be accurate.They DO think Sex before Marriage is okay,or that Artificial Birth Control is okay.I can't remember ever encountering any conflict with what they have answered in the 7 questions on Church Teachings,with what they actually believe in practice.

My conclusion is that Liberalism in the Church, has wrecked havoc on the belief and spirituality of many Catholics.There is no longer black or white,or any moral absolutes.No,this is to be shunned.Everything is a shade of gray.Either the clergy are not preaching Catholic morality and Doctrine,or Catholics are not following it.Or a little of both.We are in a sad state of affairs,and the whole Body of Christ suffers from it,as does the World.If all of the Catholics in the World believed all of the Church's teachings,and lived them out,the World would be a better place.

God give us all the Grace to Accept ALL of the Church's Teachings,and to live them faithfully to our death!
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Jul 7th 2014 new
Ooops,sorry I misspelled your name Bridie! embarassed hug
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Jul 7th 2014 new
It is hypocritical that a dating site promoting the principals of the Catholic faith allows membership to those who are not living their lives as advised by the Church. There are plenty of secular dating sites where contraception, premarital sex, etc...are the norm. Why should 7 out of 7s have to wade through profiles of members not following the tenets of the C.C.?

I would hope that non 7 out of 7s would learn from this site and eventually become 7 out of 7s but this also could work the opposite way. Members who abide by the principles now may over time relax their views if they feel alone in maintaining their core values. The world is full of ways to make even strong people weak.

I saw a post in the forums recently that divorced members are not supposed to use this site for dating purposes. A double standard because I get sent "matches" that include members who are divorced,etc.. and I am listed as a 7 out of 7.
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Jul 7th 2014 new
(quote) Michelle-989480 said:
I saw a post in the forums recently that divorced members are not supposed to use this site for dating purposes. A double standard because I get sent "matches" that include members who are divorced,etc.. and I am listed as a 7 out of 7.
There is always the possibility that a divorced member is actually free to marry because their ex-spouse is deceased.

You can apply filters to your matches so that you only receive 7/7 and marital status never married, annulled, or widowed.
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Jul 7th 2014 new

Welcome Bridie,

Though this subject has been brought up before, thank you for addressing it. Clearly, it's worth revisiting.

One would not expect to find such rejection to the fundamentals of the faith by those purporting to be Catholic. And yet, thousands upon thousands here do. The question is: why? Two things come to mind: poor catechesis and the ill effects of modernism & relativism. (The latter has unfortunately gravely affected the former.)

These heresies suggest everything is equal. (This is absurd; even a toddler knows all things are not the same and definitely not equal.) This rejection of acts being good or evil leads to a denial of sin (separation from God) and, ultimately, the existence of God.

They exalt the individual and his choice, disregarding God and all that He has revealed to us through Sacred Scripture and, especially, the Incarnation. Does this sound familiar? All sin is born of pride; the created man elevates himself above the Creator God. They put forth the false premise that truth is subjective and that each can have his own. By denying objective truth, we deny the Author of Truth.

Remember the words of St. Augustine: "If you believe what you like in the Gospels, and reject what you don't like, it is not the Gospel you believe, but yourself."

Adopting subjective moral positions means denying a fixed order in nature (given to it by God) that is binding always and everywhere. This is the source of mass confusion as well as sin.

This affront to God and departure from reason has drastically affected the way people think. In reality, simply affirming a wrong premise from the beginning (relativism), logic is completely abandoned and false conclusions are drawn. As St. Thomas Aquinas--the Angelic Doctor--reminds us, "An error from the beginning is an error indeed."

Let's take a simple yet illustrative example from one of those pesky seven questions:

The assumption is that everyone here--unless otherwise stated--is proclaiming to be Catholic. Yet, countless offer a resounding "No" to the question of sex before marriage. We are all sinners, but nowhere is there a suggestion or qualifier stated that to answer "yes" one must have never fallen short of the ideal.

So what's the problem? The problem is that people in vast numbers have rejected the ideal itself!

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Jul 7th 2014 new
I understand the view and arguments of the people responding to this thread who are confused or upset with the ideas or shall we say "Cafeteriaism" of non 7 out of 7s, or frustrated with CM's seeming hypocrisy, or making use of it as a soap box to vent....etc. (No offense, we all do that at times.) But for some reason today I feel the need to state the obvious. No one is perfect, all fall short of the glory of God, we all have our own sins and struggles. And so maybe we can look at it this way, a lot of these people who are non 7 out of 7s are at least being honest. Some of them have even been misguided and lived a long time in an environment that influenced them to think its acceptable. Another statement of the obvious; not everyone claiming 7 out of 7 is truthful, or if they are in theory, can stumble in practice. And for those who would not consider dating a non 7 out of 7 its a filter. I think it is true that either party, if divided in two sides, can be influenced by the other. But thats true in all aspects of life. We all see good and bad examples of living the Catholic Faith in the world. Do you really want to close the doors on everyone who doesnt agree with you? Never communicating, debating, possibly changing the minds of others? If that is truly what you (collective you) want, there are filters you can put up right here on CM to help you with that. You are free to respond or not respond to anyone, for any reason.
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Jul 7th 2014 new
Hi Bridie and welcome to the forums hug

I like to call those people (less than 7/7) CINO's (cheeno's) Aka: Catholic In Name Only. They want to believe they're Catholic, but they decide to pick and chose which 'rules' they want to follow, and which they want to disregard. That's not Catholic, that's Protestant (how the protestant churches came to be, they didn't agree with us).

I always X someone off if they're less than 7/7. I used to keep them in, but I found it becomes an issue, especially with birth control and premarital sex. So, as nice as a guy seems, as much as we might have in common, I skip his profile if he's not in agreement with all 7 of the faith questions.
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Jul 7th 2014 new
Howdy Bridie... Welcome to CM...

Just a heads up for you...There have been countless forum threads on this topic... Get ready for some fireworks... hehe...

I often wonder why the CM staff chose these seven teachings of the church for us to display on our profiles... There are many teachings and guidelines of the catholic church...

As many folks have advised in the past when this topic comes up... The best way to find out why a person doesn't accept a particular teaching... Ask them ... I do... Sometimes I get an answer, sometimes I dont...

Take care now...


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