Honestly, and I seem to be in the minority here, but I think it's up to the guy to drive, at the very least in the beginning. But in general, it should be up to the guy. But then, I also think it's up to the guy to do the initial "asking out". Call me old-fashioned (I've been called worse). Chivalry isn't dead. 50/50 is nice in theory, but real life isn't 50/50. My parents have been married since 1980 and they don't split anything 50/50. Dad works up to 70 hours a week and mom stays home to homeschool the kids and run the house. She doesn't begrudge him that he "gets" to go out to work and he doesn't get jealous of her for "getting" to stay home. They recognize their roles and they are happy. My grandparents have been married since 1957. On one date, he took a train from New Jersey to midtown Manhattan to get her, than they took another train to a party they'd been invited to down the Jersey shore, and at the end of the night he rode the train with her back to NYC before getting on a last train back to the shore (he was staying there for the night with his friends). All of that and NO ONE said "well, when is she going to come see you?" Why not? Because it was unheard of for anyone to expect a woman to do half the traveling. Now? Guys seem to think they should get a free pass to act like children or forget your birthday because "Hey, I'm the one doing all the driving, when are you gonna pick up the slack?"
Besides, have you read any of these member stories? More often than not, the woman ends up moving to be near the man. She should up and change her whole life AND do half the traveling in the dating process too? Seems a bit much.